She Sleeps
by bloftus
Summary: What if Bella never recovered from the catatonic week after Edward left? What if Charlie couldn't take care of her? What happens when Edward comes back and can't find her? WARNING: This story contains both rape and physical abuse.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight…sigh…**

A/N: This is my first attempt at a FanFic…reviews would be much appreciated. I don't know if this will continue, I guess it depends on the kind of response I get. This is my version of what happened after Edward left…Rated M to be safe…probable language and mature themes later on. (if it gets that far)…now enough rambling…enjoy!

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BPOV

_Bella, I don't want you to come with me_…and with those words my world imploded.

CharliePOV

I still couldn't believe my little girl is in such a horrible place, but what could I do? She wouldn't eat. She wouldn't move. Comatose the doctor called it. I hoped it would pass but two weeks after "the incident" she was no better than the day he left her in the woods. I should have sent her to Renee, but I just couldn't do it. I didn't want to lose her. I made the decision to get her professional help. That was three weeks ago to the day and I remember it like it was yesterday.

_****Flashback****_

_I walked into Bella's room and she was sitting in the same spot on her bed, just like always. She didn't even blink when I came in. I walked over to her bed and sat down. I didn't know if she could hear me but I had to tell her anyway. "Sweetie, I don't know what to do anymore. You are not getting any better and I can't help you anymore so we are going to a place where you will get the kind of support you need." She stared straight ahead, not moving. I got up and began packing some things for her to take with her, clothes, pictures, some CDs. I hoped that having some familiar things would help her cope. By the time I got everything ready, got Bella into the car and arrived at the Seattle Mental Health Center the sun was setting. I carried her inside and couldn't help but notice how small she seemed._

_****End Flashback*****_

The house hasn't been the same since she left. I can't stand to be in the kitchen anymore, but I do go and sit in her room at night when I can't sleep. I visit the hospital once a week to see her. So far there has been no improvement. They have to sedate her to make her sleep and feed her through a tube. As I sit in the rocking chair in the corner of her room thinking about how it was before _he_ left I am overcome with rage. If I ever see Edward Cullen again it will be the last thing he ever does.

BPOV

Time passes, but it has no meaning. I have no idea how long I have been here, time blends together. All I see is white all day. I can't move. I can't eat. I can't sleep. Everything reminds me of _him_ and I can't handle it. I know Charlie is worried, but I can't help it. I am lost. My world crumbled around me the day _he_ left and I can't pick the pieces up. The doctors here are kind but everything is bright and hard and uncomfortable. I miss my home. I miss Charlie. I know it seems like I can't hear or feel anything, but I see, hear, feel and remember everything that has happened since I came to this place.

_*****Flashback*****_

_I hear the door open but I care who it is. A man in a white coat stands in front of me and begins to speak. "Hello Bella, my name is Matt and I am the orderly assigned to you. We are going to be great friends you and me." He smiles at me and it makes me feel uneasy. I don't know why though. Matt is speaking again "So I will be in every day probably a few times a day to check and see how you are doing. I will bring your food and take you for your baths and sessions and when you are ready for it I will bring you to the recreation area. Doesn't that sound nice?" It sounded like I would be under constant supervision but who am I to complain._

_*****End Flashback****_

True to his word, I saw Matt very often. I had therapy sessions twice a week. I had yet to say a word at any of them. I am not ready to talk about anything yet. Matt brings me three meals a day, not that I eat them, and takes me to the bathing room every other day, where a female orderly takes over. It's the same thing every day, but I don't care. I don't have to think about anything, they do it all for me. Little did I know that things were about to change.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything Twilight related…wish I did though.**

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BPOV

Matt told me I was going to get to see the recreation area today. I had no idea why; I wasn't making any progress. I wasn't even curious about what was there, but I went with Matt anyway when he came in to take my untouched lunch tray away. (They were still hoping I was going to start to eat regular food). Matt brought me to a big open room with large windows on two of the walls (with bars of course, they didn't want any of us crazy people escaping).

There were other patients around, some were with visitors, while others were painting or drawing. It was supposed to be therapeutic I guess. As I looked around the room, one person caught my eye. A girl not much younger than me was sitting in the corner not doing anything. She was just sitting, yet she looked familiar. I just couldn't place her. While I tried to place the girl in my head a new sound caught my attention. I looked around quickly with more interest than I had shown for months. This did not go unnoticed by my shadow, Matt. "Bella? Do you like the piano? It's right over there. Would you like to play?"

I was walking toward it before I even realized that I was moving. As I drew closer I slowed down, afraid if I got to close the music would stop, just like it did when _he_ left. When I finally saw who was playing, it was like someone punched me in the chest. It wasn't _him_. I knew it wouldn't be of course. Why would _he_ come back for me? A large warm hand landed on my shoulder suddenly. I jumped away looking quickly for the source.

Matt stood behind me looking stunned. I knew he was surprised by my reaction. It was more than I had shown in the month I had been here. I guess hearing the piano shocked my senses back into some form of working order. Suddenly the room seemed brighter and more crowded. I backed myself into the closest corner and sank to the floor. Matt walked up to me slowly. "It's ok Bella. Let's just get you back to your room. Ok?"

He reached down and picked me up like I was nothing and carried me down the hall to my room. I was so shaken by what I had heard in that room that he sedated me sooner than normal. As the sedative pulled me under, I thought I felt Matt run his hands down my sides and just skim the outside of my breast, but I couldn't be sure as I was pulled under by the drugs.

CharliePOV

I was going to visit Bella today. I hoped she was making progress but I wasn't getting my hopes up. As I drove to Seattle I couldn't help but dwell and the last visit…it was painful to say the least.

_****Flashback******_

_I walked into the hospital and I went to the desk to sign in. The nurse there asked me to empty my pockets of everything. You weren't allowed to bring anything in that might be dangerous to the patients. After she was satisfied that I was fit to enter, she told me to follow her. And follow her I did. We walked through the door behind the desk and down the hall to a small waiting room. "Her doctor will be right with you. Please have a seat." _

_So I sat and waited and wondered what the doctor would have to tell me this week. _

_"Mr. Swan welcome back." He startled me. _

_I didn't hear him approach. "Dr. Thomas. I would say it was good to see you, but considering the circumstance—". I stopped speaking when he held up his hand. _

_"Of course. Let me give you an update on Bella's progress and then I will take you to see her. She is still refusing to eat and gives no reaction to people coming or going. She won't speak and needs to be sedated to sleep." I cut him off there. _

_"So basically she is no better than when I brought her in." _

_Dr. Thomas looked me in the eye, "While it is true that she has not made any improvement, she is getting the necessary help. We are taking it one step at a time. I will take you to see her now." I followed him down another hallway to the door at the end. As we entered the room, I saw a familiar sight that was just as heartbreaking as always. My baby girl was sitting on her bed staring into space. And just like Dr. Thomas has said she gave no indication that she even knew I was there. I sat with her and told her all about things at home and at work. After an hour, I could take it anymore. I got up told her I loved her and left._

_****End Flashback****_

That was a week ago. As I pulled up to the hospital I said a prayer to whatever god was listening that Bella had made some progress. I walked up to the front desk and told the nurse who I was here to see. The procedure was the same as always. I had to empty my pockets and followed her into the back where I waited for Dr. Thomas to come update me on my daughter.

"Mr. Swan, I am glad to see you. You came on a good day. Bella ate solid food this morning and she is even out of her room. Would you like to see her now?" My jaw dropped and I stared at him with amazement. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. We walked down the hall but this time we didn't enter her room we turned the corner and walked into the recreation area.

I looked around for her and finally found her sitting on the floor next to the piano listening to another patient play. She looked different. Not happy exactly but peaceful. For the first time in a long time I had hope again. "What brought on this change?" The doctor looked at Bella for a moment longer before answering.

"Yesterday we brought her out here to see if she would show any change in behavior. She reacted to the music on the piano so much that Matt, her orderly, thought it would be a good idea to see if he could persuade her to eat something if he promised to take her to the piano again. I think this was the push we needed. Is there any reason you can think of that she would enjoy the piano so much?"

I thought about it for a minute and couldn't come up with anything. "No. Her mother wanted to play at some point, but like most of her plans it fell through. I guess Bella must have liked it more than she let on." I walked over to where Bella was sitting on the floor and sat down next to her. "Bella?" She kept looking at the piano. I tried again. "Bella, it's me Charlie." After a minute of sitting and waiting, she turned her head and looked at me "Dad?"

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A/N: Well Bella's eating (a little), talking, and showing interest in something, things are looking up…for now. If you are confused about anything feel free to PM me and I will get back to asap. As of right now I plan to continue this story, but reviews would help me update faster! Push the button…you know you want to…even if it to tell me how much I suck… ;)


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer....I don't own Twilight...**

BPOV

I woke up the morning after the piano incident with a sense of purpose for the first time in a long time. I knew what I had to do. I had to hear the music again, even if it wasn't _his_ music. I heard footsteps outside my door and Matt opened it, he was carrying my food tray just like always. "Good morning Bella. I have your breakfast here. The doctor has agreed that if you eat some of it you can go back to the rec room with the piano. Doesn't that sound good? I will leave this here and be back in a half hour. Try and eat as much as you can." He left without looking back. I stared at the food and all I saw was a pile of mush.

Everything was wrong and different since _he _left. I picked up the fork and took a bite of what I thought could pass as eggs. As I swallowed I couldn't help but cringe and wait for the bad taste to hit. When it didn't I opened my eyes, surprised. This wasn't too bad. I took another bite and then another. I tried the eggs, hash browns, and toast. It wasn't long before I was full. The food felt strange in my stomach. It was something I hadn't felt in awhile. When Matt came back, he was very satisfied with the amount of food I ate, even though it was less than a quarter of what I was given. "Very good Bella! You're making progress. You can go to the rec room now if you want before your session." He looked at me like I should be jumping up and down, when really I was terrified. If he thought I was making progress just because I ate a little solid food, he didn't know as much as he thought. I was beyond broken. I had a giant hole in my chest that wouldn't heal. And Matt had no idea the amount of pain I was in. But I just nodded my head like he expected me to.

I got off the bed slowly. He waited until I was even with him, then he put his hand on the small of my back as if to guide me out the door, but since the door was too small to fit two people across he let me go ahead. As I stepped forward his hand dropped lower and rested on my ass. If that wasn't bad enough he gave it a squeeze. It happened so quickly that I thought maybe I could have been imaging things, but I knew I wasn't. I glared at him for a minute before continuing. I hope it was just an accident. Maybe he didn't even realize what he did. Somehow this thought didn't comfort me though.

When we reached the rec room it was very quiet and the same girl from before was sitting in the corner with the same expression on her face. I still couldn't place her. Matt told me he wouldn't be far and left me to do whatever I liked. I moved to the piano and sat on the floor. It was quiet. If I stayed still enough I could almost hear the music I so longed to hear. I don't know how long I stayed there, but Matt came to take me to my therapy session with Dr. Thomas. As I entered his office, I looked around for the first time. The walls were full of books and awards and certificates. On his desk was a photograph of a young couple smiling at the camera. Their happiness was plain to see and just looking at it was like having all the air sucked out of me. I couldn't breathe and I wrapped my arms around myself to hold myself together. None of this went unnoticed by Dr. Thomas. "Bella? Are you alright?" I just nodded my head. I obviously wasn't ok but I wasn't going to tell him that. I wanted out of this place even if it did have a piano. After my session Charlie was coming to visit so I pulled myself together and sat down.

He asked me the usual questions. _How are you feeling? Do you want to talk about what happened? Can you explain why you reacted so poorly to the Cullens leaving?_ When we said their name I had to hold myself together again. I didn't answer any of his questions. I just didn't want to talk about it, or anything for that matter. The session ended without a word on my part. Matt came to walk me back to the rec room and when I got there someone was playing the piano again. I just about ran to my corner. I don't know how long I was there for when I noticed Charlie sit down next to me. "Bella?" I didn't have to look at him to know the pained look on this face. I could hear it in his voice. "Bella, it's me Charlie." I don't know if it was the fact that he felt he had to remind me who he was or the shear agony in his voice, but I looked at him. I mean really looked at him for the first time since _they_ left. "Dad?"

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A/N: Sorry this is kinda short...but I wanted to get it up tonight since I won't be updating again until Friday at the earliest...also I just wanted to let you know that the story should start picking up now...I have a few curve balls I want to throw in...as always...review, review, review! Thanks!!

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	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight…Thanks to SMeyer for creating it though!!!**

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BPOV

Charlie and I sat for what felt like hours. He did most of the talking, but every so often I would comment about something that had happened. I could tell it made him happy that I was paying attention. There was one question I had to ask though. "How are you feeding yourself?" He looked a little embarrassed. "I've been eating at the diner." I cringed inwardly. It was my fault he had no one to prepare meals for him.

I looked out the window and the sun was set. I could see Matt crossing the room. I knew it was time for Charlie to go and time for me to go back to my room. Suddenly I didn't want to leave. I knew it was irrational, but someone was playing the piano the whole time I was talking and I felt connected to it. When Charlie saw Matt approaching he stood up and looked down at me expectantly. I couldn't move. The very thought of leaving the beautiful music paralyzed me. I gazed up at Charlie with fear in my eyes. "Bells?" he asked. Matt was now standing next to him. "Come on Bella it's time to go." I just shook my head and began edging away from him. Matt looked at me in surprise and what I thought was a bit of annoyance.

He took a step forward and I shot upright, but continued to back away from him. "I don't want to go. I want to stay here. Please don't make the music stop." I was begging and I didn't even care. "Bella you have to go back to your room. You can't stay here all night." Matt said as he continued to advance on me. I did the only thing I could think of, I put the piano between us. "Bella, please don't be difficult. You don't want to cause a scene in front of Charlie." Charlie! I had forgotten he was still here. He was looking at me with pity and disappointment. He thought I was better and this just proved how broken I really was. While I was looking at Charlie, Matt came up behind me and grabbed both my arms. I screamed. "Get off me! Let me go! I don't want to leave! Please just let me stay! Dad!! Daddy!!!!" Matt was dragging me father away from the only salvation I had found, the sweet peaceful piano music.

Matt threw me rather roughly onto my bed and crossed the room back to the door. He looked back at me one time. "I will be back with your medication after I talk with Dr. Thomas." With that he walked out. I jumped off the bed and ran to the door, I knew it was useless, but I had to try anyway. I pulled on the handle and ranted and raved until I sank to the floor in exhaustion. Just when I had lost all hope of getting back to the piano, the door opened. But it did not lead to the relief I was seeking. Matt stood there with my medication in his hand. I tried to push past him, but he was too big. He grabbed my arm and dragged me back to the bed. "Bella you are making this harder than it needs to be. Stop struggling!" In one quick movement he had injected the sedative into my stationary arm. I felt the drugs take hold almost immediately. My last thought before I slipped into my dreamless sleep was that this happened much faster than normal. They must have increased the dose.

CharliePOV

Bella was talking! I couldn't believe it. We sat and talked until the sun set. She was attentive the whole time, even asking me a question. "How are you feeding yourself?" I looked a little embarrassed. "I've been eating at the diner." Luckily I was saved from having to say more by the arrival of Matt. I stood up getting ready to leave and I looked down at Bella. She looked terrified. "Bells?" I didn't know what could cause this kind of reaction. She knew Matt. He was here to take her to bed. "I don't want to go. I want to stay here. Please don't make the music stop." She was begging to stay by the piano and I had no idea why.

"Bella you have to go back to your room. You can't stay here all night." Matt said as he continued to move toward her. She had moved so the piano was between them. "Bella, please don't be difficult. You don't want to cause a scene in front of Charlie." I sounded like Matt was scolding a child. Something about it seemed off, but it got Bella to look at me. I could tell she had forgotten I was here. It made me sad for her and disappointed at the same time.

She seemed like she was really getting better, but it seemed like I was wrong. While she looked at me, Matt managed to get a hold of both her arms. Bella did not like that one bit. She screamed and struggled and tried to kick Matt in the shins. "Get off me! Let me go! I don't want to leave! Please just let me stay! Dad!! Daddy!!!!" It broke my heart to hear her yelling for me as she was dragged away. I knew it was for the best but it was still hard to see. I waited for awhile to see if Matt or Dr. Thomas would come tell me what was going on, but no one came.

The drive home was hard. The longer I thought about Bella screaming for me the worse I felt. By the time I got home I was have one giant pity party, so I went to sit in Bella's room. I sat on her bed for while and thought about what I had lost. My ex-wife left me and took my baby girl with her, Bella stopped coming to visit for the summers, and just when I thought I got her back…the Cullens leave and take her away from me again.

I sighed and stood up. It was not doing any good to dwell on the past. As I walked to the door the floor creaked. I paused. That wasn't there before. I know because I checked before Bella moved in. I knelt down and searched for a loose board. I pulled it up and to my surprise there was something there. I pulled out an envelope with three pictures in it and a CD.

I looked at the pictures briefly and saw that they were of Edward and Bella. The difference in dynamics of the pictures was amazing and it made me wonder what happened to make things change so quickly. I put them aside and studied the CD for a moment before I stood up and went to the stereo in Bella's room and put the CD in. I listened to the first song and didn't recognize it so I flipped through the rest of the songs. I knew it was someone playing the piano but I didn't know who. I took the CD and brought it with me when I went downstairs. I didn't know what I was going to do with it yet but I figured I should keep it just in case. I grabbed a beer from the fridge and went to the living room to watch the game.

I woke with a start and looked at the clock. 3:00 AM. Wow I must have fallen asleep after the game. I got up and went to the kitchen to throw out the beer can I had dropped on the floor. I saw the CD sitting on the table and it hit me like lightning bolt. Bella was upset today because she had to stop listen to the piano music. Well what if I brought this CD to the hospital? She could listen to piano music all the time. It seemed like a perfect idea and I told myself I would bring it her tomorrow. I trudged up the stairs with a new sense of hope.

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A/N: Sooo….I started writing this chapter with more action in mind, but I got to over 1000 words and decided that I would post it now. I promise things are going to start happening…Review please!!


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to the fabulous SMeyer…**

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CharliePOV

I was in the kitchen making a pot of coffee the following morning. It was easier to be in here since I knew that Bella was making progress. Baby steps true, but it was better than nothing. I poured myself a cup of black coffee and sat down at the table to think. I stared at the CD on the table. Last night things were so clear. If Bella wanted music then I would bring her this and she would be fine, but what if it was hidden for a reason. I had no idea who the person playing was but what if it reminded her of Edward. I didn't want to think about the consequences that would bring.

I wasn't a doctor. I didn't know what this would do to her, but Dr. Thomas might. So I picked up the CD grabbed my keys was out the door and on my way to Seattle before you could say Boo. I would let the professionals figure it out.

I meet with Dr. Thomas to discuss the CD idea. "Dr. Thomas, I found this CD hidden under a loose floorboard in Bella's room. I don't know exactly what it is other than someone playing the piano and I thought since she was so upset about leaving the music last night, you could play this in her room and she would be happier." Dr. Thomas looked at me for a moment before reaching for the CD and putting it on. We sat and listened for a full minute before he spoke.

"Do you know who is playing this?"

"No. No one I know could play that well."

"Well, it is good that you brought me this Charlie. I will see what we can do about letting Bella hear it."

"Can I see her? I just want to make sure she is ok after last night."

"I don't think that would be the best idea. She is not very stable at the moment and I am afraid that the smallest thing might send her spiraling back into a comatose state, so we have her isolated from anyone but myself and Matt."

I just stared at Dr. Thomas for a moment. Bella was unstable? No one could see her? Naturally I was upset, but he was the doctor. "Ok Dr. Thomas. Thanks for all your time. Just let me know how she is doing will you? I'll be back next week."

I got up, shook his hand and walked back to my car. As I started driving home, I couldn't help but think this was going to be a very long week.

BPOV

I woke up feeling very groggy and disoriented. Then the events of last night come back to me. I didn't know what the Matt and the doctor would do about my "episode" but I knew it wouldn't be good. Speak of…Matt pushed the door open and stood there with my breakfast tray. He didn't speak as he placed it on the bed and turned to leave the room. I wanted so badly to ask him if I would get to go back to the piano music today, but I was afraid of what he would say so I kept quiet.

I ate what I could of my breakfast, which was a little more than yesterday, and then I just sat and waited for Matt to come back and tell me what was going on. When he didn't come back for my tray I started to get anxious, but I figured he was probably just busy with other patients. Finally, after what seemed like hours, but I couldn't be sure as I had no way to tell time in here, he came back. I jumped off the bed hoping to leave immediately. Matt closed the door behind him and crossed the room to sit on the end of my bed. I watched him move and became more and more nervous because one he never closed the door when he was still in here and two he looked like he was planning something. He was watching me with calculating eyes.

"Bella, I know you are expecting to go the rec room today, but after what happened yesterday Dr. Thomas and I both believe that it is not a good idea. You became to dependant on the music too fast. So you are going to be staying in here for awhile." My jaw dropped and I my knees gave out. How could they do this to me?! Don't they understand that the music was all I had to get me though the day? I sat on the floor starting up at Matt.

"Please don't do this. I need the music. Please I'll do anything." Matt smiled a little, but it did not make me feel better.

"Anything huh…well it just so happens that Charlie stopped by today with a CD that he found under a loose floorboard in your room." I froze. I didn't hide anything under the floor. I didn't even know I had a loose floorboard. Matt held the CD up for me to see and it hit me like a freight train. It was the CD _he_ made me. Suddenly the rec room didn't matter anymore. I had to hear that CD. It contained the music that I imagined was coming from the piano and I knew I didn't do it justice.

"Can I listen to it? Please?"

"Well Bella I guess that depends. See I talked to Dr. Thomas and he wasn't sure whether this would help or hurt you so he told me to figure it out. And if I tell him that you shouldn't be listening to it I am quite sure he will dispose of it." I hung my head and felt the crushing pain that came when I hoped too much. After yesterday I was sure Matt wouldn't let me listen to it.

"But I could be persuaded to let you listen to at least one song today." I lifted my head to look at him, shocked by his comment.

"Please Matt please let me listen to it. I need it"

"Well Bella here's the problem. This job doesn't really leave a lot of time to go out and have a life and a man can get kind of lonely hanging around crazy people all day." The confusion I was feeling must have shown on my face because he continued. "Bella you are very beautiful, probably the prettiest thing I get to look at all day and I would like to see more of you. Do you understand?"

I had no idea what he was talking about. I wasn't pretty or desirable in anyway. I mean _he_ obviously didn't think so. I shook my head and Matt sighed.

"I was hoping it wouldn't come to this. If you want to hear the CD I want you to strip now."

I was horrified. This wasn't like Matt. He was kind and gentle and…I stopped myself. He had squeezed my ass and tried to touch my breast. God I was so stupid! How could I forget that? I didn't know what to do. I knew that this was my only chance to hear _his _music again and if I didn't I knew the pain would swallow me whole, but no one had ever seen me naked. Not even _him_.

"Why are you making me do this?" Matt just smiled. "I told you Bella, I'm lonely and you are beautiful. Now this is a limited time offer so unless you want this CD to be destroyed I suggest you get off the floor and take off your clothes!" He was yelling by the time he finished.

I stood up slowly and started to take off my shirt. I was shaking so badly that it took me a few tries to grab it. I pulled my shirt off in one quick motion. "Good girl. Now your pants." I pulled my pants off and threw them on top of my shirt. I was now standing in nothing but my bra and underwear. Matt looked me up and down. "Beautiful. Exquisite." I tried to cover myself with my hands and that made him angry. "Stop it! Now take off your bra. I want to see your breasts." I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"Please no more. I just want to hear the music."

"Damn it! Stop begging and take off your fucking bra!" Matt looked very angry and I was scared. I reached behind me and undid the clasp on my bra and let it fall to the floor. I immediately covered my exposed breasts with my hands. "Bella put your hands down let me see you." I shook my head. I didn't want to. Matt got off the bed and grabbed my arms forcing them to my sides. "Gorgeous. You look even better than I thought you would." He leaned so close I thought he was going to kiss me but at the last minute he turned his head and kissed my neck. I shivered and it wasn't from the cold or excitement.

"See that wasn't so bad was it. Now get dressed while I go get a CD player." Matt walked away while I scrambled into my clothes. I was sitting in the corner of my bead holding my knees when he returned. He set the CD player on the floor and looked at me. "I think you have earned one song for today." He sat down next to the CD player and pressed play. Immediately the sweet sound of my lullaby filled the room. Just hearing it again brought back so many good memories of Edward and our time together. I cringed and waited for the onslaught of pain that usually came when I thought his name. But there was no pain. Not today. It had to be because of the music.

I didn't question it as I continued to listen. I wasn't tired when the song started, but by the time it was over I was laying on the bed drifting off to sleep without medication for the first time since Edward left. I would probably pay for thinking his name but right now I just didn't care. I don't know when Matt left but I fell asleep thinking of happier times and the beautiful creature that I still loved.

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A/N: Well…Matt's true character is finally coming out…ass! I having so much fun writing this…the response I have been getting is fantastic…so for all you reviewing thanks!! It means the world to me that you like this story enough to take the time to review it…and as always…Review please!


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight…or any related characters.**

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BPOV

I was 99% sure I was dreaming for a few reasons. One, I was outside in our meadow. I haven't been outside in almost a month and a half and it's been even longer since I was in the meadow. Two, I was wearing my prom dress from junior year, which I haven't seen since I made Alice get rid of it. And three, Edward was walking toward me.

I started hyperventilating. I couldn't believe it. He was here, even if it was a dream. The closer he got the harder I stared at him. He was perfect. My wonderfully perfect Greek god. He stopped a few feet from me. "Bella?" I was shaking so badly that I was surprised I remained standing.

"Edward? Why…why are you here?" He looked at me confused, and then flashed that crooked smile that I loved so much. "I'm here because I love you of course. Do you want me to leave?" I was too stunned to answer. He loved me? Then why did he leave? "Bella? Do you want me to leave? I can if you wish." He looked sad and started to turn around. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come. Just know that I love you no matter what."

I could feel the tears start to fall. "Edward wait!" I called. He was almost to the other side of the meadow, but was back at my side in an instant. He swept me up in a crushing embrace and swung me around. "I knew you wanted me here!" He was smiling so broadly that it made me giggle. It was a strange sound, my giggle. I hadn't felt the need to laugh in a very long time. I was so very beyond happy at this point, but I still had to ask him some questions.

"Edward, don't take this the wrong way, but I'll ask you again. Why are you here?" He put me down but didn't let me go. "Bella, I love you. Forever and always. I will always be here."

"But you left me. You left me alone and broken. And…and I went a little crazy when you left." I looked away as I said the last part. If I looked in his eyes I would forget what I was trying to say.

"Silly Bella. I never left. How could I? You are my life and my only reason to live. If I left you I would be nothing." He was smiling as he said it and it almost made me believe that this was real and everything else was a terrible dream, but something wasn't right with him. There was one way to know for sure if this was my Edward. "Edward, what would you say if I asked you to change me into a vampire right now?"

He looked down at me still smiling. "I would do anything you asked love. You know that." This wasn't my Edward. This was some horrible imposture. I pulled away from him so fast that I actually managed to get away. It was only because I surprised him though. He looked at me still smiling and a little startled. "Bella what's wrong?" I took a step backward. I needed to get away from him. I didn't know who this was but it wasn't Edward. My Edward was stuck on me staying human.

"Bella stop. I just want to take care of you since you clearly aren't doing a very good job of taking care of yourself." Now I was the confused one. How did he know what I was or wasn't doing? I looked down and saw that the dress was gone and I was once again in the hospital gown and I looked thin and too pale to be healthy. I quickly looked at Edward again, but he was gone. I ran toward the other end of the clearing thinking he left the same way he came in. Before I got there, I collapsed on the ground too exhausted to move.

I woke with a start. I was sobbing uncontrollably and I didn't know why. I remember have a strange dream but I didn't remember what it was about. I think Edward was in it but I couldn't be sure. I buried my face in my pillow to muffle my sobs. The last thing I wanted was Matt coming to check on me. I would have to see him soon enough as it is.

When I finally stopped crying, I laid in bed trying to remember my dream. I think I was in our meadow. I think Edward was there and I think he told me he loved me, but it was very fuzzy. I sighed and rolled over to face the wall and waited for Matt to show up with my breakfast.

EPOV

_Bella, I don't want you to come with me_…that was one month ago. I was an idiot. I thought I could live without her. Still this was the best option. I couldn't, no I wouldn't, put her in danger anymore. She would go on to live a normal safe life. And me, I would be miserable, not that I didn't deserve it. I deserved to endure a slow agonizing death for ever putting my Bella in danger.

I left my family. I couldn't take the looks on their faces or their thoughts. Not only were they all feeling sorry for me, they were pissed off. Everyone loved Bella, not like me of course, but they loved her none the less. Alice was so angry at me for making them leave she wasn't speaking to me. She considered Bella a sister and I forced her to abandon a sister. I knew I was driving Jasper up the wall with my emotions I just couldn't seem to care. Esme was depressed which made Carlisle unhappy. Emmett missed her "humanness" as he called it. Rosalie was the only one who wasn't in some small way angry with me, but she was still full of pity. She may seem shallow, but she really does care about her family. She didn't like seeing me like this. So I left. I just needed some space to figure everything out.

Before I left I made Alice promise not to look into Bella's future. We had done enough damage already. She was even less happy with me after that conversation. Now I was hunting, just not animals. I was trying to track down Victoria. She would pay for the part she played in trying to kill my Bella. No not my Bella, not anymore. I made sure of that when I left. I will never forget the look on her face when I told her I didn't want her. It was of course the blackest form of blasphemy I had ever uttered, but she believed me so quickly. I stopped myself there. It did no good to dwell on the past. It was done.

Victoria had a knack for getting out of trouble. I almost had her cornered in Mexico, but she slipped by me. I tracked her to South America, which is where I was now, but I hadn't seen her in days. I would keep looking until I found her. I had all the time in the world and nothing else helped distract me from the overwhelming sense of lose and pain I felt every time I thought of her. So I would hunt until I found Victoria and then I would lock myself away and suffer alone.

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A/N: That's right TWO chapters up today…you all get to benefit from my wonderful mood…As always let me know what you think…good, bad, or indifferent…Reviews are better than getting 104% on my Biochemistry test!


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight...**

BPOV

By the time Matt showed up with my breakfast I had pulled myself together. I didn't want him to see me so upset. I didn't know how he would react and I wanted as little to do with Matt as possible. Although I knew that was impossible as he was almost solely responsible for my well being. When he opened the door and brought my food tray over to me I was huddled in the far corner or my bed. I didn't want him to touch me. He either didn't notice my reaction to seeing him or chose to ignore it. Either way he turned and left without speaking. As my door closed behind him I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding. A least he was giving me some peace this morning.

I wasn't hungry but I knew there would be consequences if I didn't eat something so I forced some food down my throat. I didn't know what Matt had planned for me today, but I could guess it would be worse than yesterday so when he came back I stayed as far away from him as I could. "What's wrong Bella? You don't need to be afraid of me. You know that." He smiled when he said it. He sounded so genuine that if I didn't have the entirely too vivid memory of yesterday I would have believed him. "Let's go. You get to go back to the rec room today. I have some business to take care of so I won't be around today, but the other orderlies know to keep an eye on you and I will be back before you go to bed tonight."

The way he said it made me extremely uneasy, but I smiled a little when I realized that I had the whole day to myself. No looking over my shoulder and no huddling in the corner. Of course this meant that I couldn't listen to my CD today, which hurt me more than it should, but there was always tomorrow. Wait was I looking forward to tomorrow? I giggled when I realized that I was looking forward to a day in the future. I hadn't thought about anything other than the present and the past for over a month. It was strange and it was even stranger that I would probably have Matt to thank for that. Granted I hated him and he was a manipulative bastard, but he made me look forward rather than back and that was something I never would have accomplished on my own.

Matt was looking at me expectantly. I sighed and stood up to follow him. I knew that after hearing my lullaby, the piano would not hold the same meaning to me, but it was better than nothing.

When I entered the rec room, I looked around. There was no one at the piano yet and since I couldn't play and sitting in silence didn't seem like a good idea after yesterday I turned to the row of windows on the opposite side of the room. Matt stopped me with a hand on my shoulder before I took a step. I flinched and didn't look at him. "Behave today Bella. Someone will be reporting back to me your behavior today. Don't make me angry. You won't like what I tell Dr. Thomas if I get angry." He stopped and put a hand under my chin to turn my face to look at him. When I met his eyes they were dark and angry. "Is that understood?" I couldn't speak so I just nodded. "Say it bitch!" He hissed at me, low enough that no one else heard.

"Yes sir." He dropped his hand from my face and put the fake smile back on his face. No one even noticed the exchange between us. "Good girl. I will see you later tonight." With that he turned and walked away with a look back. I shivered. I was even more worried about tonight, if that was possible. I sighed and put it out of my mind. I didn't do any good to dwell on what was sure to happen. I turned back to the windows and went to sit in front of them. They were low enough that I could sit at a table and still see outside. It was dark and gloomy. A storm was coming. It seemed oddly appropriate.

I don't know how long I sat there before I realized that I could see my reflection in the glass. I hadn't seen myself since Edward left. I could think his name without totally incapacitating myself. It still hurt, but not as much as thinking about what Matt was going to do. I welcomed this pain. It made everything seem worth it somehow, knowing he was out there somewhere and happy. I was too thin and much paler then I was before. My eyes were dead, which was fitting since I felt dead on the inside. My hair was dull and ratty. It was longer than the last time I saw it too. It was strange, I felt like I had seen this face before, but I know I hadn't looked in a mirror for over a month so I wasn't seeing me.

As I sat thinking about where I had seen "me" before someone stepped in front of me and blocked my view. At first I was confused. No one ever pays attention to me. I wasn't worth it. Confusion gave way to anger. I just wanted to be left alone. The anger faded quickly to fear. As I looked at her face, I gasped. I know where I had seen "my" face before. It was the girl, the very same one who sat in the corner by herself. She stood in front of me now and was almost unrecognizable. She looked alive and happy, something I definitely wasn't, but I remember her face from before very clearly. It was why I felt like I knew her. She was me. Well not really but she looked exactly how I thought I would look, dead on the inside and frozen on the out.

"Hi. I'm Catherine. My friends call me Cat." She smiled down at me. I just continued to stare. I wasn't used to a stranger talking to me. When I didn't say anything her smile slipped a little. "Are you ok? You look like you could use a friend, and I know what I am talking about." I still couldn't speak so I just nodded. She sat down next to me. "Look I don't know what got you to where you are, but I know where you are. I can see it in your eyes. You're confused about why I would talk to you and you are scared that I will hurt you. Well I am talking to you because you look like you could use someone to unload on and I won't hurt you because I was where you are. I'm bipolar so I know what it's like to go though the gauntlet of emotions." She seemed like she meant every word she said, but I couldn't be sure.

"I'm Bella." I was still scrutinizing her face trying to see some ulterior motive behind her talking to me. She could be working for Matt. God now I sounded paranoid! She was right of course. I needed someone to talk to. Someone who wasn't going to be analyzing everything I said and I certainly needed someone who wasn't going to abuse me for making them angry. I needed an Angela. Thinking about my old friends brought on a new wave of pain. I missed them, well most of them. Angela, Ben, Mike, even Jessica. Lauren I could live without, but the others I missed. So I made a decision. I was going to just take it slow with Cat and find out if she was actually trustworthy.

"So Bella, care to tell me why you're here? You don't have to of course, but it helps to talk to someone who isn't going to analyze everything you say. I should know since I have been here for about 6 months now." She laughed, but it was darker than it should be, and it was laced with bitterness. She seemed too young to have a laugh like that. "How old are you?" I asked. I was suddenly very curious about this very forward girl.

She looked at me for a minute. "I'm 16. My dad died last year and my mother never fully recovered. She dumped me here 6 months ago. She wanted to travel and she didn't want to take care of her extremely moody daughter anymore. Don't get me wrong I love my mom, but she was never able to really take care of me. I was always a daddy's girl. When he died, I just didn't want to deal with anything anymore. I wasn't suicidal or anything, but my mood would change drastically over the smallest things. I couldn't figure it out, but I was working on it. And then my mother brings me here and tells me she wants to travel and that this place will make me better. She said it would only be for a few weeks then she would be back and we would be happy again. Needless to say she didn't come back and no one can find her, so I am stuck here until I turn 18."

I was so engrossed with her story that the sudden silence surprised me. "Don't you have any other family to go to?" I asked. She sighed. "No, both my parents were only children and their parents died when I was younger. So I am technically a ward of the state since my mother is MIA. And since she checked me in I can't check myself out until I am 18. The doctors can't even send me to the foster system since she was the one to sign the papers to get me in here." She looked sad and I was sorry I had brought it up. "I'm so sorry." I knew it wasn't even close to being enough, but it was all I could offer at the moment.

She smiled at me again. "It's not so bad though. Dr. Ashley is nice and Molly, my orderly, is like a second mother. Plus I turn 17 next week so I am down to one year left." She paused and looked in my eyes. "Please don't feel sorry for me. I wasn't telling you all this to make you feel guilty. I just want you to trust me. And I know trust has to be earned so I figure if I share enough, you will feel comfortable enough to tell me your story." She stopped talking and just looked at me.

I was astonished that she was so open about what happened to her. And she seemed lighter, happier that I knew. I wanted that feeling. I wanted to get to the point where it didn't hurt to think about Edward and the whole Cullen family. I doubted it would ever happen, but I wanted to try, for Charlie's sake if not my own. I opened my mouth to tell her my story, but before I could say a word a matronly looking woman appeared behind Cat. "Cat dear, it's time for your meeting with Dr. Ashley." She looked at me for the first time. "Oh, who's your friend?" She smiled at me.

"Molly, this is Bella. Bella, Molly." I kept looking between them. I could tell that Cat felt very comfortable around Molly and Molly really cared about what happened to Cat. "Well it's a pleasure to meet you Bella, but we really must be going." Cat stood up "See you later?" She was really giving me a choice about whether I wanted to see her again. "I'll be here all day." Cat smiled a brilliant smile. "Bye Bella!" She called as she followed Molly out the door. It caused people to turn in my direction and see what was going on. I sank down into my chair and turned back to the window. All I could think about was what I was going to tell Cat when she got back.

APOV

I was going to kill Edward. How could he be so stupid?! Didn't he know that he and Bella belonged together?! How could he think leaving was a good idea? I missed my sister and best friend, but a promise is a promise and I did promise that I wouldn't look into her future anymore. I wondered if she missed us or is she just moved on like Edward told her too? Thinking about Edward made me angry again. Not only did he make this stupid choice, but then he goes and leaves. He broke Bella's heart and at the same time he broke this family. Even Rose who never really liked Bella is upset that we had to leave. I felt a wave of calm pour over me. I sighed. Poor Jasper we were all driving him crazy with the roller coaster of emotion. Immediately I looked around for him. He was leaning against the wall across the room from me. The rest of the family had gone hunting and he decided to stay behind to get some peace and quiet and here I was making it worse.

"Sorry baby. I know you must be going crazy. I'll try harder. Promise." I smiled at him. He crossed the room and knelt in front of me at vampire speed. "Don't ever apologize for your feelings Alice. It's what makes you you. I know you miss her. We all do. I should know." He grinned and I had to laugh. It felt good. It felt right, and it made Jasper's grin get even bigger. I made myself a promise that I was going to try and laugh more, but it would be hard. Jasper leaned forward and touched his lips to mine. "We will get through this. All of us." I sighed and he kissed me again, harder and with more energy this time. I leaned into him and all thoughts of our family crisis left me, which was of course his intention. He knew me too well.

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A/N: Longest chapter yet!! Yay! Thanks to everyone who has reviews so far. I read every one and they make my day. So REVIEW PLEASE!!!!!!

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	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is my debt...sigh**

BPOV

I don't know how long I was waiting for Cat, but when she returned she looked happy to see me. "Hey Bella! Long time no see." She laughed which made me smile. She was a surprisingly easy to get smile around. She sat down in the same spot as before. "So…you looked like you were going to tell me something before I left?" She made it a question giving me the option of saying no if I really wanted to. I made a snap decision to trust her with my story.

"You will probably think I'm crazy. My story sounds like a fairy tale, with Prince Charming and everything. It's the ending that destroyed me, even though most normal people probably wouldn't have ended up here." I paused to see her reaction. She nodded for me to continue. I took a deep breath, glanced at her and then stared out the window behind her and told my story. I told her how I moved to Forks, meet Edward, feel in love, and had my heart broken when he left. I told her how I felt and how I ended up in this place. The only thing I kept for myself was the fact that my Prince Charming was a vampire.

This was the most I had spoken in a very long time and it felt good to get it all out. When I finished, the sun had set and it was starting to storm outside. Cat was looking at me kind of funny. She stood up and I was sure she thought I was crazy and was never going to talk to me again. It made me sad. I know I had only known her for a day, but I liked her already. Then she surprised me. She came around the table and pulled me up into a big hug.

"Oh Bella, I don't think you're crazy at all!" She pulled back to look in my eyes. "You loved him and he broke you, heart and mind, when he left. That is nothing to be ashamed of. In fact it speaks volumes about your character. You love with your whole heart and he is a bastard for breaking you! I am a little confused about why he left though. You said it was something that happened at your 18th birthday party?"

I was so overwhelmed by the depth of her conviction that it took me a minute to compose myself enough to talk. "Yeah. His brother, Jasper, has a bit of a temper and he took a swing at me at my party, nothing happened, but Edward was angry, probably because I was creating tension in the family. Jasper had been getting his temper under control before I came along. Or maybe he just got bored and he got tired of saving me all the time, mostly from myself. I don't know. All I know is that I still love him and I will until the day I die." Before I could stop myself I told her about the piano. "That's why I love piano music so much. He used to play for me. He even made me a CD with some of his music. They have it here and I get to listen to it sometimes. It is the only reason I get up in the morning anymore."

Cat was so busy looking at me that we both jumped at the voice that was suddenly behind me. "Bella, I'm home!" He laughed. Cat composed herself before I did. "Hey Matt! Long time no see. How have you been?" I didn't turn around. I was too busy trying to figure out how much of that conversation Matt heard. I knew that is he heard that I was still in love, even if it was unrequited, it would not be a good thing. "Cat, good to see you again. I am well thank you. I hear you are doing very well." I was looking at Cat when he said her name so I saw her reaction. "I'm surprised you remember me."

I could hear the smugness in Matt's voice. "How could I forget such a beautiful girl?" Cat blushed at his praise and I wanted to throw up. "Come on Bella, it's time to go back to your room." I flinched when his hand touched my shoulder, he noticed. Cat didn't. "Bye Bella. See you tomorrow?" I couldn't speak so I just nodded.

Matt forced me to start walking toward my room. As we got closer to the door Matt leaned down and hissed in my ear. "Making friends and still in love? Oh Bella you have been very naughty today." I shivered. I knew he heard the end of my conversation with Cat now I just had to figure out what he was planning to do.

I entered my room ahead of Matt so I didn't see him lock the door, but I heard it. I stood as still as a statue in the middle of my room. He walked around me and sat on the bed. "Now Bella. You need to be punished for disobeying me today. I told you that you would be being watched and still you managed to piss me off. So strip. Now!" I was afraid. I didn't know what he was planning to do, but I knew it would be worse than ever before. I stripped down to my underwear and bra. Then I hesitated. I really didn't want to be naked again, but I didn't want to make him angry. He noticed my hesitation. "NAKED, BELLA! NOW!!" I had never seen him this angry. I took off my bra and panties and stood in front on him shaking. I didn't want to see his face so I stared at the ground.

"Look at me Bella." I didn't move. "LOOK AT ME!!" I still didn't look at him. I heard him get up. He grabbed my chin and forced my head up to look him in the eyes. They were livid. "You had best learn your place bitch. This will only end one way and that's my way. You will do what I say when I say it or I will make you wish you had never been born." He didn't scream. He was calm when he said it. Little did he know that I already wished I had never been born. "Do you understand me?"

"No." I don't know why I said it. I meant to say yes, but my words betrayed me. It took a minute for what I said to sink in, but when it did, I could tell. His eyes were more angry than even and I felt the hand holding my chin start to shake. His voice was low and hostile. "What did you say to me you little bitch?"

"I said, 'No' I don't understand you and I won't do what you say." I don't know where this was coming from, but I figured I might as well go with it. He dropped my chin like it was on fire and took a step back. "So help me Bella, you will learn your place." I wasn't expecting it so I didn't see it coming. He backhanded me across the face so hard I hit the floor before I even felt the pain in my cheek, and when I felt it, I wished I couldn't. He looked down at me. "Do you want to rethink your answer?" I stared up at him. He wouldn't beat me, much. He couldn't. Dr. Thomas would know something was wrong the next time I saw him. So I took a deep breath. "Yes, what I meant to say was 'No I won't do what you say, you sick pathetic Fuck! You disgust me and I hope you burn in Hell!!"

"Well Bella, I'm very sorry you feel that way, but you really shouldn't make me angry." He was smiling again. "Why? You can't do anything to me. I'll tell Dr. Thomas and he will see the evidence for himself. You will go to jail." By the time I had finished my little speech he was laughing. "Dr. Thomas left this morning. Until they find a replacement therapist for the clinically depressed you belong to me." My stomach dropped to my feet. Dr. Thomas was gone and Matt was in charge of me from now on? I felt sick again. I knew by the time they found someone to take Dr. Thomas's place I would be in no condition to care. There was no one to hold Matt in check now and I was more afraid than ever before.

Matt had stopped laughing and was now staring down at me. He didn't say anything and since I was looking at his face I didn't see what was coming for me. He kicked me in the stomach, and didn't stop. He kicked, punched and beat me until I lay in a crumpled heap on the floor. I was crying. I hurt so badly I just wanted to die. But he wasn't finished with me yet. He kicked my shoulder just hard enough to roll me over so I was on my back looking up. "Now that that's out of the way. Let's have some fun." He undid his belt and pulled off his pants. I turned my head away. I didn't want to see him. "Oh now Bella don't be like that. Look at me. Look at what you do to me every time I see you." I knew what he was referring to of course, but I didn't turn to look at him.

I heard him sigh. "Bella you are only making this worse for yourself." He stepped over me so that one foot was on each side. He pressed the side of his foot into my already bruised abdomen. "Look at me." The pain was too much. I turned my head and looked up. He stood above me, hard and heavy. "See what you do to me Bella? Now is that fair? This happens every time I see you and every time I have to endure it alone. Well now you are going to see firsthand what happens when a girl is a tease." I tried looking away again, but he put pressure on my side until I looked back.

He grabbed himself at the base of his cock and started moving his hand up and down. I had never seen a man like this before. I always thought Edward would be my first, but he didn't want me enough to stay so that dream when out the window. But I guess I had always had hope that he would come back for me and I would be waiting to welcome him back. Now I could see that even if he came back he wouldn't want me anymore. I was dirty and I was even less worthy of him now than I was when we were together. I was glad he wasn't here to see me like this.

Matt could tell I wasn't paying attention to what he was doing. So he kicked me again. I cried out in pain. "Focus Bella! This is all for you after all. I'm imagining that this is your hand stroking me." I was going to be sick. He started moving his hand faster. "Oh yeah baby…just like that…don't stop…God Bella you feel so good! Fuck! I'm gonna cum baby…ya just like that don't stop…Ungh…_FUCK!_" He came all over my exposed breasts and stomach. The fact that he was fantasizing about me made me sick. He stood above me panting. "Well that was fun." He laughed to himself and walked over the bed. He pulled his pants back on and started towards the door. Before he left he pulled out a small towel. "Clean yourself up. I'll see you tomorrow."

I heard the door lock behind him. I couldn't move, but I felt too dirty to stay where I was. I crawled over to the towel he left on the floor and cleaned off my chest and stomach. It hurt so much to move, but I wasn't leaving a single spot on me. I finished cleaning myself up and I pulled myself up using the wall and the bed. I couldn't stand up straight because of the pain in my ribs and back. I knew I wouldn't be able to get dressed without passing out so I just fell into bed and pulled the covers over me. After I was safe in my bed I let the reality of what just happened consume me. I tried to muffle the screams in my pillow, but I am sure someone heard me.

I sobbed and screamed until the pain was too much and then I let the darkness take me. The last thing I remember was thinking that if he could see me now, Edward would be so disappointed in me.

CharliePOV

I was watching the game, when the phone rang. As I walked into the kitchen, it hit me that it was two months to the day that Bella left. "Hello?"

"Mr. Swan, it's the Seattle Mental Health Facility. This is Matt speaking."

"What's wrong?!" My thought immediately going to Bella.

"Nothing is wrong sir. I was just calling to let you know that Dr. Thomas has left the hospital and we are in the process of looking for a replace for him. But Bella is being taken care of so there is no need to worry about her. I also wanted to let you know that she has come down with what looks like the flu so it would be best if you didn't come visit this weekend. I will call you when she is feeling better."

"Are you sure she is ok?" I didn't like that she was sick and all alone.

"Of course sir. I am taking care of her. She is my only priority now."

"Alright well if you're sure. I'll stay away for now but tell her that I love her and I am thinking of her. And I will see her as soon as she is better."

"Of course sir. Have a wonderful rest of the day."

I hung of the phone and just stood in the kitchen for a minute. Something seemed off about Matt. It was almost like he was too polite. But I convinced myself that he was just trying to relieve my stress over Bella being sick. I shook my head and went back to the game. I would see Bella next weekend, whether she was still sick or not.

JPOV

I was hunting. I had convinced Alice to let me go alone. I couldn't take the emotions of my family for much longer. They were driving me insane and I couldn't even be mad at them for it. This was all my fault. If I hadn't taken a snap at Bella two months ago we never would have left. If only I had been able to control myself like my siblings this would not be happening. Alice was devastated, but she was trying to find happiness in the little things, for my sake. She was trying to pull everyone out of the depression they were in.

Esme felt the loss of Bella like the loss of her own child. And Carlisle was devastated that he couldn't help Esme. Alice felt the crushing loss like of her best friend and sister. She was also very angry with Edward. Any time he was around her rage spiked. Emmett was pissed. He loved Bella like a sister and felt very protective of her. And Rose, well Rose was smug, at first, and now she was just was depressed as the rest of us. Edward was the worst. He was in pain greater than anything I had ever known. It went deeper than even the pain of the change. He knew it was killing me so he left, which only intensified the feelings of the rest of the family so really it didn't help.

I caught the scent of a heard of elk and took off in their direction. I knew that this would be the only time I had to myself and I wanted to make the most of it so I didn't attack right away. I stalked them first. I took down the two biggest in one pass. I snapped their necks and drained them dry. When I was finished, I tried to come up with a way to avoid the house a little longer, but I knew I would have to return at some point. So I sighed and ran for home. When I stepped though the door it was like getting punched in the stomach, repeatedly. I knew that if something didn't change soon, this family would break. I just wished Edward could understand and fix it.

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A/N: Sooo...hands up - who wants to castrate Matt?? I do! I do! Things are not looking good for our heroine...When is Edward going to get his rear in gear and save he?!...Well that's coming I promise, but not for a while yet...so keep reading and even more importantly REVIEW!!! (I read them all...good/bad/indifferent)...Suggestions are always welcome!

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	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Just a reminder...this story is rated M for a reason and it shows up in this chapter...now that being said...read on!

PS: **I don't own Twilight**

EPOV

I spent the last month locked in this room. I had lost her trail. I had no idea where she went, but I lost her. I failed. I didn't hunt. I didn't deserve to sate my thirst. I didn't deserve to call myself a man. I wanted to die, but I knew that it would kill my family and as much as I wanted to end this sorry excuse of an existence. I knew that _she_ was still out there. I wanted to go back. I wanted to beg and plead and grove until she took me back. I needed to tell her I was an idiot and that I left to protect her. I fought the overwhelming desire to run back into her arms, for now. But I knew that I would go back and check on her soon just to make sure she was safe and happy. How could I not? I owed her that much. I should have stayed away from her in the beginning. It would have been better for her.

I was already wallowing on the past, so I decided to at least do it thoroughly. I closed my eyes and pulled her image from my perfect memory. I could see her as if she were standing in front of me. I could see everything, her beautiful hair, her gorgeous brown eyes, and how she looked when she blushed. I could even imagine her smell. God how I loved the way she smelled!

I pulled out a memory of her voice. _"Edward, I love you." _I sighed. This was going to hurt when it ended. "And I you Bella, my love and my life." The apparition in front of me sighed and she sounded sad. _"Then why did you leave me behind?"_ If I could cry I would be weeping. My cold, dead heart was breaking on the spot. "I left to protect you, love. I am no good for you. You deserve someone who doesn't have to worry about accidentally killing you, someone who can take you into the sun."

I knew what she would say to that. _"Edward Cullen you listen to me –"_ Then she stopped. Her beautiful form started to fade away, and she disappeared, but not before I heard something I had only heard once before when I had almost lost her. Her blood curling scream. She was terrified. _"EDWARD!!"_ I jumped to my feet prepared to attack before I realized that there was nothing to hurt. I knew it was all in my head but it felt so real. I was shaken. I was sorely tempted to call Alice and ask her to look into Bella's future, but that would open a whole other can of worms. I needed to make a trip home so I could look in Alice's head. Maybe she had seen something and just didn't tell me. I flew out the door and was on my way to the airport in seconds. I had to stop and hunt on the way but that was easy enough.

BPOV

I sat up gasping for breath. My chest hurt and I felt like I had been run over by a truck. Then the memories of last night came flooding back. I was going to be sick. I sat in bed trying to calm my racing heart. Nothing was working. I tried to get myself standing, but as soon as I put pressure on my legs they crumbled beneath me. The shockwave of pain I felt from hitting the floor was unbearable.

I must have passed out because the next thing I remember is Matt's foot connecting with my side. I groaned and rolled over trying to escape the pain, but he just kicked me again. "Get up bitch. You have to go meet the new doctor today. His name is Dr. Walsh and you can forget about telling him about yesterday. He won't believe you." I gave no outward indication that I had heard him so he reached down, grabbed hold of my upper arms and hauled me to my feet. The sudden movement made the room spin and I had to work very hard to keep the darkness at bay.

Matt looked me in the eye and for a moment I thought he was going to kiss me, but at the last moment he stopped pulling me closer to him. "Do you understand me you little slut?" It was at this point I remembered that I was still naked. I hadn't yet had the energy to put my clothes on. Apparently I took too long to answer because he shook me. "Answer me!" I took a deep, shaky breath. "Yes." He smiled and learned forward. Before I could even register what was happening his lips were on mine.

His kiss was fierce and demanding and I struggled against his hold. In some ways this was so much worse than him using me as a fantasy. To me kissing was reserved for those you had an emotional connection with, like Edward. And with that thought I was thinking about kissing Edward and him kissing me. This kiss was nothing like the one I was craving. It was warm and rough and too passionate. I wanted cold and gentle, and the one I wanted would have pulled away a long time ago. I stopped struggling. I knew that if Matt knew it was hurting me he would keep it up so I was hoping that by not reacting he got bored.

Sure enough after another few seconds he pulled away. "See. That wasn't so bad now was it?" He looked so smug that I had the sudden urge to wipe that look off his face. He released my arms and took a step back. "Now get dressed. You have a session with the new doctor in 5 minutes." I can only think of one reason why I did what I did next. I was clearly going to die in this place, if not in body then definitely in spirit, Matt would see to that, and I was never one to prolong the inevitable. I gathered all my strength, balled my hand into a fist, and punched Matt square in the nose.

He staggered a bit, but that was probably because I surprised him. I wasn't very strong so I didn't think I broken anything, but he was no longer smug. Now he was just pissed. "What the fucking hell?! That was a very stupid move my dear, one you will pay dearly for later, but right now you are going to put on your fucking clothes!" I had done what I wanted. I hope that he was angry enough to kill me later then I could get out of this place. I spared a thought for what Charlie would say, but the more I thought about it the better it seemed. Charlie could move on. He would no longer be the parent of a crazy person. He could have a somewhat normal life after I was gone.

I turned my back on Matt and began the painful process of getting dressed. As soon as I was finished he had the door open and was waiting for me to walk out. Apparently I didn't get breakfast this morning. I walked down the hall toward Dr. Thomas's old office. Matt didn't tell me where I was going, so I could only assume it was the same place. When I stopped outside the door I saw that I was right. This was the new office of Dr. Daniel Walsh. Matt knocked once and opened the door. "Dr. Walsh this is Isabella Swan. Bella this is Dr. Walsh." Daniel Walsh was tall and lean and quite honestly very intimidating. He just didn't scream _I'LL KEEP YOUR SECRETS!_

"Hello Bella. It's very nice to finally meet you. Matt has told me so much about you. Please sit down. Matt you may leave. Please return in one hour." Matt just nodded once and left the room, closing the door behind him. Dr. Walsh was looking at me expectantly so I sat down across the deck from him. "So Bella, why exactly are you here?" I didn't know what he was expecting me to say. I was only here because my father put me here. "Umm…I guess I'm here to get better?" It sounded like a question. "Bella everyone is here to get better. But why are you _here_? Why are you sitting across the desk from me?" Now I was really confused. These sessions were mandatory for all patients. "I'm here for you to help me." It didn't sound like a question this time.

"Wrong! You are here because you are told to be here. You have no choice in the matter and therefore I can't help you." I knew it. Matt had poisoned my doctor against me. He didn't want to see me get better because Matt didn't want me to leave. "Bella, I can't help you until you help yourself. You need to accept the hand fate dealt you and live your life to the fullest." Great not only did my doctor not want to help me but he sounded like the spokesperson for a self help guru. "Matt told me you are a compulsive liar Bella. He even told me that you might try to make me believe that he hits you. Why would he say something like that?"

My jaw dropped. He was making me out to be a liar?! "He told you that so that when I told you that he _does_ beat me, you wouldn't believe me, because if you did Matt would not only lose his job, but he would go to jail for a long time." Dr. Walsh just looked at me. "Bella I believe he told me this because he knows that you are craving the attention. Your mother got remarried. You had to move to a town that you hated. Your serious boyfriend dumped you and your father signed you in here because he couldn't take care of you. It sounds to me like you missed the attention." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Did he even hear what he was saying? "You can ask anyone who knows me. I hate attention. I despise being the center of attention and I would much prefer if not one noticed I existed."

"Well Bella, you are clearly in denial and until you are ready to admit the truth there is not much I can do for you. So I am going to call for Matt to take you back to your room. You tell him when you are ready to talk to me again." He couldn't be serious. This was total bullshit. I was the crazy lying attention whore and Matt was the one who was in the right here? I don't know how long I sat there contemplating what had just happened, but I figured it out. In one clean sweep, Matt had cleared the way for him to do whatever he liked. No one would believe a word I said anymore and I am sure he would continue to tell Dr. Walsh that I wasn't ready to admit the truth and was therefore not ready to talk. I was doomed.

I vaguely remember walking back to my room, but when I got there Matt snapped me out of my musing. He slapped my across the face again. "You fucking little bitch! How dare you hit me!" The slap didn't bring me to the ground like the previous one had, but I wished that it did. I wished a beating was all he had in store for me. He didn't say anything. He just started circling me like the vulture he is. When he was directly behind me he stopped moving. I could feel his breath on my neck and I could feel his hands on my waist. His hands traveled up the sides of my body to my neck. I was sure he was going to strangle me, but both his hands slipped underneath the collar of my shirt. In one sudden move, he tore my shirt off my body by ripping it right down the middle. Without missing a beat me undid my bra and pulled it off. I was standing naked from the waist up and still he didn't say anything.

His hands moved down to my chest and cupped my breasts. He squeezed, hard. It hurt, but it was bearable. It was when he pinched my nipples that I finally cried out in pain. He sighed against my neck. "Ah Bella, you know exactly what turns me on." He was demented. Matt obviously had something wrong in his head. After another hard pinch and roll that brought tears to my eyes, his hands resumed their path down my body. When he reached my waist, he didn't stop. One hand continued to move below the waistline of my pants. I started to tremble. I knew this was the punishment he talked about earlier.

When his hand cupped my center I jumped. At first he didn't do anything, but then he started to move. He stroked me with two fingers through my panties. I didn't give any kind of indication that I was aware of what was happening other than the fine tremble of my body. I tried to control myself, but I was terrified. "You feel better than I imagined, but I want to see for myself." His hand stopped moving and returned to my waist. Before I could blink he had ripped off my pants and panties. "Step forward." I didn't move. He was going to have to work for what he wanted. "Bella, you are making this more difficult than it has to be." He pushed my shoulder to get me to move, but he either forgot that I had zero balance or he just didn't care. I tripped on the pants that had pooled around my feet and ended up on my hands and knees next to my bed.

I heard a hiss behind me. When I turned around, Matt was staring at my exposed ass and visibly panting. "We are going to have so much fun together. Now stand up and lay down on the bed." I wasn't going to make this easy for him so I stayed put. He just shook his head and grabbed my upper arms. He threw me backwards on the bed. Immediately, I curled up into a ball and tried to cover as much as myself as possible. "Fine, be that way. It's no fun if you actually want it." He walked over to me and grabbed one of my arms. I tried fighting him, but I was so much smaller than he was. He pulled my arm up and tied it to a leg of my bed. I didn't know what he had planned for me, but I knew being tied up wouldn't be helpful.

I started kicking and screaming. I tried to reach his face so I could claw his eyes out. "LET ME GO! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME YOU BASTARD!!" He managed to dodge my attacks and grabbed my other arm. I was sobbing now. He moved to my feet. I continued to kick and scream and struggle against the bonds that held my arms in place. Despite my attempts to hold him off, he had my feet tired to the bed in no time flat. I was now laying spread eagle before him, totally helpless. "Matt please don't do this. I'll be better I promise. I'll do whatever you say without question. I'll never tell anyone about anything just please don't do this to me." He stood there and grinned at me.

"Oh Bella, it's too late for any of that to do any good now. This is the only way you will learn. No be a good girl and shut the fuck up!" He pulled off his shirt and pants. He wasn't wearing any underwear. I cried even harder if that was possible. I shut my eyes as he crawled over me and settled his hips between my legs. "Look at me Bella." I shook my head. I felt a sharp pain in my shoulder and my eyes snapped open in surprise. I looked over and saw a perfect impression of Matt's teeth. "Now then, maybe next time you will do what I tell you the first time." He pushed himself up so that his lower body was the only thing touching me. I felt the tip of his cock press again my opening. I shut my eyes again. I didn't want to see this. "This will hurt me more than you…actually no…it will definitely hurt you more." He laughed. My eyes were open again, but this time they opened with a scream and Matt pushed his whole length inside me at once.

He didn't give me time to adjust to his large member. He started slamming into me over and over again. I thought I was going to pass out the pain was so bad. But he didn't care. Again and again I felt him pullout then slam back in. It was excruciating. I wanted to die. This went on in silence for some time and then he started talking. "Oh God Bella…you feel so good…it's so much better than I could have imagined…ugh…fuck…your cunt is so tight and hot…it's like it's sucking me back in… oh God baby." He started moving faster and harder and I kept crying, but I couldn't keep still. I was in too much pain. "Ugh…I'm gonna cum…" I froze. He wasn't wearing a condom. I started to panic. "No Matt please, anything but that. Not inside please! Oh God no! Stop, please!"

He just kept moving, but I couldn't tell if he was close or not. I had no way of knowing when he would finish. "Bella I'm cumming!" I could feel it happening, but he kept moving and I kept pleading. "Stop! Matt no! Not there please! Oh God no more, please no more…EDWARD!!!" I knew he wouldn't hear me. Even if he did he wouldn't care what happened to me. Matt collapsed on top of me panting. After about a minute he got up, pulled on his clothes and left without so much as a backwards glace at me. I felt like someone had shoved a hot poker inside me. I felt like I had been torn apart. I curled up into the tightest ball I could and prayed for earth to shallow me whole.

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A/N: …I'll just let you all tell me how you feel about this one…click the button and let me know what you think…

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	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: I only own Twilight in my dreams...thankfully I sleep alot! Haha...but really it belongs to the fabulous SMeyer.**

APOV

Edward was coming home. I didn't know why, but he would be here in less than two days. He would stop to hunt in about two hours and then catch a plane to Miami. His connecting flight to Vermont would be delayed by a storm. I could call and tell him to move faster and catch a different flight, but I wouldn't. I was petty that way. I sighed.

"Alice what's wrong?" I looked at Jasper who was suddenly surrounded by the rest of the family. "Edward is coming home. He'll be here in about 28 hours." Esme looked overjoyed. I am sure she would have been crying if it were possible. Carlisle looked relieved. Emmett looked pleased. "Good. Now I can kick his ass!" Rose smacked him in the head but she too was smiling at the news that the family would be complete again.

"Could you see why he is coming home Alice or how long he'll stay?" Carlisle looked deep in thought. "No. His only thought right now is to get here. He hasn't thought of how long he will be staying." Esme had that determined look in her eyes. "That doesn't matter now. Once he's here and sees how happy we are to see him he won't want to leave again." It didn't matter how much I hoped that Esme was right. I knew Edward better than anyone. He had a reason for coming home and once he accomplished what he needed to do he would be gone again.

JPOV

When Alice announced that Edward was coming home I was happy. The emotions surrounding everyone were the polar opposite of what they were less than a minute ago. Edward was coming home. And if he thought he was leaving again, he had another thing coming. So help me, I would make him see reason. He wouldn't be breaking this family again.

EPOV

I sated my thirst on the way to the airport. Not because I wanted to, but because I knew that being on a plane full of people while I was thirsty was not a good idea. Not that I didn't deserve the pain, but I didn't want to disappoint Carlisle again. The flight to Miami was uneventful. It was an odd hour to fly so the plane was relatively empty. The flight attendant was overly helpful and her thoughts bored me. Of course there was only one person I wanted to hear and I that would never happen.

When we landed in Miami, I saw that my connecting flight was delayed by 8 hours. I sighed. It was the middle of the day in one of the sunniest place in the United States. My phone buzzed in my pocket. It was a text from Alice. _Enjoy your wait._ I gritted my teeth. She could have warned me there would be a delay, but them again she was very angry with me lately, not that I blamed her. I am sure the whole family would be waiting to get a piece of me when I got home. I hadn't exactly been easy to get a hold of these past two months. I still had not figured out what I would do after I picked Alice's brain for information on Bella. I knew it would be too hard to stay with them. Seeing the couples just made my separation from Bella more difficult. I guess I would just cross that bridge when I can to it.

BPOV

I eventually fell into a dreamless sleep. I don't know how long I slept, but when I awoke Matt was sitting in the chair across the room. "Morning sleepy head." He was smiling. I didn't say anything. I rolled over to face away from him. "Now don't be that way. I'm sorry for last night, but you really have only yourself to blame. If you weren't so God damn sexy I wouldn't have been tempted like I was." I froze. "Your body is perfect. Your face is beautiful and your hair. I just love your hair. The thought of your beautiful curls spread out on the pillow beneath me. Well let's just say that image has helped me more than once."

I was crying again. It wasn't enough that he took everything from me! Now he was going trying to make me hate myself. "Get up and get dressed. I have laid your clothes out for you. We are having a little outing today, just the two of us. I have already cleared it with Dr. Walsh. He thinks it will do you some good to see the outdoors. I'll be back in 5 minutes. You will be ready to go." I heard him shut the door and rolled back over. I knew that if I didn't do what he said he would beat me again. I was still broken from yesterday so I dragged myself up and pulled the clothes that he laid out for me on. It was a short black skirt that fell about halfway down my thighs. A white, long sleeve blouse and a white satin bra completed the outfit. There were no panties, but there were thigh high stockings and black stilettos that he wanted me to put on. I put the stockings on. They stopped just above the end of the skirt. The shoes were another story. I had trouble walking as it is. There was no way I was putting on four inch stiletto heels.

I felt naked without underwear on. But I didn't have much time to think about it because Matt entered the room about 30 seconds after I finished dressing. He looked me up and down before he spoke. "Put the shoes on." I shook my head. He opened his mouth, but before he could speak I started talking. "Look, I can't walk normally without tripping. And I am assuming that what you have planned will be disrupted by having to carry me because I broke my ankle." He was silent for a moment. "Well you are right about one thing. You can't walk normally, but you are wrong about my plans. I could care less if you break your neck. Nothing is going to stop what I have planned today. But fine. Go barefoot, but bring the shoes with you. Now let's go. My car is right outside." I was shaking as I walked past him out the door. The fact that he was so blatant about his disregard for my wellbeing did not bode well for me.

We drove for a relatively short time. I didn't know where we were going, but I knew it would be isolated. We reached our destination in about 20 minutes. It was the end of the road, literally. "Get out. We walk from here." I was shocked. He expected me to hike in my bare feet or in stilettos? I don't know why this surprised me but it did. Matt obviously didn't care about anyone but himself. I decided to go barefoot; at least I wouldn't break anything on the way. We walked for about an hour before we broke through the trees and into a clearing. I fell to my knees. I knew it wasn't the same, but it was so similar and it reminded me of the day he trusted me enough to show me who he really was. I looked around at my own personal hell.

The meadow looked so much like _our_ meadow that it was hard to tell the difference, but I knew it wasn't the same. Matt was staring at me on the ground. "Get up bitch!" He wasn't screaming, but he was loud. It was probably just to prove to me that no one would hear my screams. And I would scream. Matt walked a few feet away from me and set his bag down. I hadn't even realized he had been carrying one. He knelt down and pulled out a portable CD player. I was confused. He sent it down and started digging in his bag again. He pulled out a ball gag and a blindfold. NO! I wouldn't let this happen to me. Matt was distracted getting set up so I made my move. I slowly got to my feet and took a few steps backward. Just as I turned to make a run for it he looked over at me. "I wouldn't it I was you. I'll catch you and it will only piss me off, but by all means try."

I knew he was right, but I couldn't not try. Not with the evidence of my coming rape on the ground in front of me. So I ran. I heard him behind me and I knew he would catch me. I was weak and hurt and even if I managed to escape him I would die out here. I had no idea where I was or where I needed to go. He was closer now, but still I ran. It wasn't long before he caught up to me. When his hands closed around my upper arms I kicked and screamed and cried and fought. He dragged me back to the clearing and threw me to the ground. "SHUT THE FUCK UP!" I tried crawling away, but he kicked me in the gut. I curled up into a ball and screamed. I didn't look at him, but he must have gone back to his bag because one minute I was screaming and sobbing and the next I had a gag in my mouth and the blindfold over my eyes.

"That's much better." I tried screaming again, but it so muffled by the gag that I decided to save my energy for when it really mattered. I felt him put the stilettos on my feet. "Now be a good girl and stand up." I tried to find my balance blind and on unsteady ground. I fell before I was even standing up straight. "Well this just won't do. I'll be right back." I heard him move away from me and I reached up to take the blindfold off, but he was back before I could undo the knot. He pulled me to my feet and bent me over something hard but smooth. I think it was a bar stool but I couldn't be sure.

He moved away from me again and when he returned he pushed something into my ears. I realized they were headphones. Suddenly the only thing I could hear was my lullaby. This was worse than anything he had done so far to me. He was corrupting something that was pure and beautiful. It would never be the same for me. It was total sensory deprivation of sorts. I couldn't speak, hear, or see what was going on around me. I had no idea what he was doing. It felt like hours, but was probably only a few minutes. He lifted my skirt over my ass and suddenly I felt his tip press against my core. And in one quick thrust he was buried deep inside me. I screamed about the gag. I still hurt because of yesterday and this time he was much deeper. Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse he started to move. He was rough and hard and hurtful. Again and again he buried himself in me and I screamed every time.

He was moving so fast and hard that I felt the support beneath me wobble. I few thrusts later it broke, but it didn't matter because he grabbed onto my waist and kept me in the same position. It felt an eternity before he finished. But eventually he came and dropped me to the ground like a discarded doll. I landed quite painfully on the pile that used to be whatever was holding me up. He pulled the ear plugs out and removed the blindfold and ball gag. The sudden bright light blinded me for a moment. Tears were streaming down my face harder than ever. Matt was looking down at me. "Now you have even more reason to listen to that song. Every time you hear it you will think of me." He pulled on his pants, turned and walked back to his bag. He knelt down and started putting everything away. I wanted to die. I would never be able to listen to my lullaby again. Everything it represented was lost. Now it was just a piece of this horrible nightmare.

I shifted my weight as I became aware of a sharp pain in my back. I realized that I was on top of a pile of broken wood. It was the remainder of a bar stool and some of the pieces were large and thick. A plan was forming in my head. Matt was not paying any attention to me. I knew I couldn't run. I wouldn't last very long against him, but I might be able to stun him. My fingers closed around the largest piece of wood I could find. I kicked off the stilettos. I couldn't afford to fall now. I crept across the clearing as quite as could be. Before I knew it I was standing behind Matt and he was still packing things away. I pulled the piece of wood back and swung it, like a bat, with as much force as I could muster.

I hit him right in his temple and he went down. He wasn't unconscious, just stunned. I didn't give him the change to recover. I hit him again and again. I wanted to cause him as much pain as possible before he passed out so I made sure to hit him a few times in his groin. I know he felt it because every time I hit him he grunted in pain. Eventually I hit him across his temple again and he passed out. For a moment I was stunned.

I don't know where all that strength came from but I knew I had to get out of here before he woke up. I turned and stopped. It wasn't enough. I hadn't hurt him enough for all the pain he had caused me. I knew that I wasn't strong enough to do much more, but I had to do something. I reached down and quickly stripped off his clothes. He lay naked before me. I turned and found my discarded stilettos. I put one on and ground the heel into his crotch. I kick off the shoe and ran in the opposite direction. As I ran I dropped his clothes in random places. Before I dropped his pants I reached into the pocket and took his wallet. He owed me after all.

I didn't know where I was going, but I didn't care. I was free and it felt wonderful. Eventually I slowed to a walk. My feet were torn up and my arms were scratched from the trees. I kept walking until I stumbled across a road. I followed the road until I couldn't walk anymore. I was exhausted. So I sat and waited. I figured someone had to come by. Sure enough about 5 minutes after I sat down a car passed. I stood up and flagged them down. I knew I must have been a mess, but they stopped. A man was driving and a woman sat in the passenger's seat. "Are you all right Miss?" He looked normal enough, but then again Matt had too. "No. Please help me. If he finds me he'll kill me." This startled them both. Then the woman spoke. "How old are you honey?"

I looked at her for a moment. "Eighteen" I answered truthfully. The man looked at me for a moment longer before he unlocked the door. "Hop in." I let out the breath I had been holding and broke into a huge grin. "Thank you so much! You just saved my life." I got into the back seat and closed the door. As the car began to move I looked over my shoulder. He wouldn't be able to find me now. The farther away we got the better I felt, but as the adrenaline wore off, my body screamed in pain. The woman turned around and looked at me. "Where do you need to go honey?" I thought about it for a moment. I knew I was somewhere in the Seattle area. I also knew I couldn't go home. Charlie would probably put me right back in that place for running away. There was only one place I knew I would be safe. "Could you take me to the bus station please?" My saviors looked at each other. "Are you sure? You look like you could use a hot shower and a good meal and maybe a doctor." I felt the tears well up in my eyes. No one had really cared about me in so long. It was overwhelming. "I'm sure. I need to get as far away from here as possible. But thank you. You don't know how much it means to me that you would willingly take in a stranger." She smiled at me and turned back to the front. We drove the rest of the way in silence.

When we reached the bus station I was the first to break the silence. "Could you wait here one minute?" They both nodded. I ran to the ticket window. "One ticket to Forks please." The cashier looked at me for a moment. "$30 please." I took out Matt's wallet and handed the man the proper amount. I took my ticket and ran back to the car. I leaned against the passenger window. I handed the rest of Matt's cash through the window. It was about $100. "Please take this so your trouble." The woman started to protest, but I interrupted her. "Please! It will make me feel better." She slowly reached through the window and took the money. "Thank you again." I turned and walked back to the terminal.

I sat on a bench and waited for my bus to start boarding. My ticket said it was leaving at 5:20pm. It was currently 4:00pm. I took out Matt's wallet and started digging through it. I was tempted to take his credit card, but I knew he could trace it and find me so I immediately threw it on the ground away from me. I continued to go through his wallet until I found what I was looking for, a debit card. I flipped the card over to look at the back and my jaw dropped. I knew Matt was stupid but this was just a whole different level of dumb. There on the back of his card was his four digit personal identification number. I quickly looked up and found the atm. I walked over and took as much money as I could out. All in all it ended up almost cleaning out his account, a little over a thousand dollars. I laughed. I no longer needed this card so I threw it in the closest trash can, put the money in my bra and went back to wait for my bus.

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A/N: Matt deserved worse and don't worry he is not off the hook yet, but let's have a round of applause for Bella kicking Matt's ass!! And a standing ovation for the kind couple that saved her…you know the drill, PUSH THE BUTTON!!!

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	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight…sigh**

A/N: This is a short chapter…sorry…there is an explanation at the end. Enjoy!

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BPOV

The bus ride was uneventful. People stared, I knew they would. I am sure I looked like a train wreck. It didn't bother me as much as I thought it would. I stared back until they got bored or embarrassed and looked away. I spent the majority of my time planning. I knew where I was going, but I didn't know what I would do when I got there. I had a little less than $1000 to my name. It wouldn't get me very far. I was starving. I don't remember the last time I ate, but up until now I hadn't noticed. I was so concerned with getting away, getting free that I hadn't had time for anything else. I sighed. I knew I wanted to sleep for a year, but I also knew that was impossible. They would be looking for me soon. I had to figure out my next move.

I was so caught up in my own musing, that I didn't realize we had arrived. When the bus driver announced our stop, I jumped in my seat. I hurried to the front of the bus and stepped outside. I looked around. It was good to be home. I didn't think I would ever see this place again. I quickly moved into the cover of the trees. I didn't want anyone who knew my father to see me. I started walking. I knew I would get lost if I ventured too far in, so I stay close enough to the road to see it, but far enough in to remain hidden. And I walked. I followed the road until I found the turn off. I followed the dirt road and it felt like eternity before the house came into view, but when it did, I was home.

It looked exactly the same. I knew only three months had pasted, but it felt like a lifetime ago. I expected there to be some noticeable difference. I guess if you looked hard enough the grass was longer and the trees looked wilder, but you had to really look. I was suddenly nervous. It felt like I was trespassing.

I pulled myself together. They left me here. They LEFT me! I didn't owe them anything anymore. I walked up the steps to the front door and turned the knob. It was unlocked. The first thing I wanted was a shower. I felt dirty all over. I walked up the stairs to the second floor. I was on autopilot. I opened the door to what used to be Alice's bathroom. I didn't look at myself in the mirror. I didn't want to see. I turned the water on as hot as I could stand it and stripped off my clothes. I stepped into the scorching water and let it wash me clean. I needed so much more than hot water to make me clean again, but I would take what I could get for now.

I washed every inch of my body as thoroughly as possible, but I still felt dirty. I turned off the water when it started to turn cold and wrapped myself in a large, white, fluffy towel and faced the mirror for the first time. My face was relatively untouched. I had a few red marks on my neck, but nothing drastic. I dropped the towel and looked at the rest of my body. I looked even worse than I thought I would. My sides and stomach were purple and my back had deep scratches and large bruises. I slowly reached down and pick up my towel. When I looked at myself again I locked on my hair and the only thing I could hear was his voice. _The thought of your beautiful curls spread out on the pillow beneath me. Well let's just say that image has helped me more than once._

I snapped. I fled down the stairs to the kitchen and started searching. As soon as I found what I was looking for I ran back upstairs to the bathroom. I stood in front of the mirror and brought the scissors to my hair. I hacked it away until it was as short as possible. When I was done I stared at myself in the mirror and only then did I realize that I was crying. I knew there was no going back to the girl I was before. I wandered into Carlisle and Esme's room. I knew that Esme was about the same size as me and knowing Alice, they had left all their clothes here.

I pulled out a white blouse and the shortest pants I could find. I had to roll the pant legs up about 4 times before I could walk without tripping. Once I was dressed I went downstairs. I was still hungry. I started rummaging in the kitchen for something to eat. I found a can of soup and heated it on the stove. I only managed to eat about half the bowl before I was full. I cleaned up after myself and returned the kitchen to its former pristine condition.

It was sunny out and I was free. I went out to the back and lay on the grass. I was going to absorb as much sunlight as possible. I drifted in and out of consciousness. I was safe here. No one would find me. I stayed outside until the sun set. I was tired. I pulled myself upstairs to the first room I found. I pulled the dust sheet off the bed and crawled under the covers. I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

I woke from a dreamless sleep and I felt so much better. I felt renewed. I felt hope. And just as quickly as I felt it, it vanished. I was alone. I was on the run. And I was terrified. I huddled under the covers for as long as possible, but my body had needs that it demanded I take care of. I crawled out of bed and headed to the bathroom. After I took care of my biological needs, I went downstairs to find something for breakfast. I found some unopened cereal in the cabinet and I grabbed a bowl. As I ate I decided that it was time to catch up on what was happening in the world. I sat on the couch and turned on the TV. I nearly choked on my cereal.

The first thing I saw was my face, and then I heard it. _Police are searching for this girl, Isabella Swan in connection with the assault of Matthew Park. Mr. Park was found in the woods about 15 miles away from the Seattle Mental Institution where Mr. Park work and Ms. Swan was a patient. Mr. Park's injuries were not life threatening. Police are asking anyone who knows anything to call their local department. Do not approach Ms. Swan. Her current mental state is unknown._

I was in shock. That was the only word for it. I knew they would be looking for me, but they were making me out to be dangerous. I was pissed! I knew I should have bashed his skull in when I had the chance. I panicked. I couldn't stay here. They would find me and put me in jail or worse put me back with Matt. I jumped off the couch and ran to the door. Before I took a step outside I stopped. No one knew I was here and since the Cullens left no one would think to look for me here. I could stay here for as long as I wanted.

I wandered about the house. There was one room that I refused to go in and that was Edward's room. It would hurt too much to go in there. I decided to take a nap, since I could. I went up to Alice's old room and crawled back into bed. I don't know how long I slept, but it was still light outside so I decided to go back outside. I lay outside, watched the clouds, and let my mind wander. I thought about how my life should have gone if Edward never left. I closed my eyes and could see myself standing beside Edward, beautiful, pale, and his equal. We should have been together for eternity. But that all changed when he left. He didn't want me and I didn't deserve him.

I was crying again. I had to get control of myself. This was getting out of hand. So I decided then and there that I would not shed another tear for someone who didn't want anything to do with me. I picked myself up and walked back into the house. I found some pasta and sauce for my dinner. And I ate in silence. I was mentally and emotionally exhausted. Thinking of what should have been wore me out. I took a quick shower and crawled into bed.

I don't know what woke me, but it was still dark out. I listened carefully for anything that wasn't right. That's when I heard it, a creak on the stairs. That was strange. No one else should be here. "Hello?" I called out. Only silence answered me. Great Bella, tell whoever is out there exactly where you are. Of course in order for someone to find this house whoever was out there was probably a vampire which meant they could find me no matter what. For a second I allowed myself to hope. They had come back for me!

I was out of bed and opening the door before I realized how stupid that was. They weren't coming back. I knew that. I opened the door slowly. I couldn't see anything in the darkness. "Is someone there?" I was scared now. I heard a low hiss. I tried closing the door and turned to run back to bed. Before I took two steps, I was hit hard in the back of the head. As I feel to the floor I heard laughter and then nothing as the darkness took me over.

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A/N: Don't hate me! I'm sorry!!! But I wanted to get this up since I won't have much time this weekend. I have 2 papers due and an exam in the next ten days so stick with me. I may not get another chapter up this week, but I will make it up to you…I promise! Now, click the button and tell me what you think!


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything Twilight related**

A/N: So I know I said I wouldn't be posting for awhile, but the response to this story as been amazing. When I started writing this I honestly thought people would hate it and I wouldn't write more than a chapter or two, but that has all changed. You guys are amazing!! For all of you who have reviewed YOU ROCK!!! And to everyone who has added me to your fav/alert lists THANK YOU!! Seriously from the bottom of my heart thank you all so much. Now as a special treat here is the next chapter…enjoy!

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APOV

Edward would be home in less than two hours. And he would stop to hunt before he got here. Everyone was anxious for his arrival. It had been too long since our family was together, although this reunion would be bittersweet. We missed Bella and having Edward here would shine a spotlight on our one missing member. I missed my sister and I would do whatever it takes to get Edward to man up and beg for her forgiveness. Carlisle was in his office. Esme was out in her garden. Rose was doing her hair, again. Emmett was watching a game on TV. Jasper and I were sitting on the front porch.

I wasn't strictly paying attention to what was going on around me. I was too busy looking into Edward's future. I needed to see. So I didn't notice when the game Emmett was watching was interrupted for an important news brief. I did however hear Emmett gasp. "Everyone get in here now!" Everyone was in front of the TV in less than a second. "What's wrong Emmett?" Esme was the first to voice the question on everyone's mind. "Watch this. Bella's a watched fugitive." We watched in horror as the announcer told us about our missing piece.

_Police are searching for this girl, Isabella Swan in connection with the assault of Matthew Park. Mr. Park was found in the woods about 15 miles away from the Seattle Mental Institution where Mr. Park work and Ms. Swan was a patient. Mr. Park's injuries were not life threatening. Police are asking anyone who knows anything to call their local department. Do not approach Ms. Swan. Her current mental state is unknown._

For the first time ever my mind was blank. I couldn't wrap my head around what they were telling me. Bella hurt someone. Bella was in a mental institution. Bella is missing. I wasn't the only one who was having a problem coping with this. Everyone started talking at once.

"What?!"

"How is this possible?"

"Carlisle we have to do something!"

"Everyone stop for a minute. Alice, you didn't see any of this?"

I looked at Carlisle. "NO! I made a promise to Edward and as much as it killed me to keep it I did. I haven't looked into her future since we left and I wasn't there when she needed me!" I was panting, even though I didn't need the air. If I could have cried I would have been sobbing. "None of us were there Alice you can't blame yourself. Can you see anything about Bella now?" I was nervous. I had built a wall in my mind around Bella. I essentially blocked myself from seeing anything about her. I didn't know what would happen when that wall came down. "I'll try."

I closed my eyes and found the place in my head where the wall stood. I took a deep breath. There was no time like the present. One moment the wall was before me and the next I was assaulted by visions that I should have gotten months ago. I fell to my knees and cried out in horror. This couldn't be real. Oh God please tell me this is a mistake. I saw everything. I saw her on the floor in the forest. I saw them taking her away. I saw her retreat into her mind and avoid the world. I saw her opening up and then paying dearly for it. I saw her under a stranger crying out in pain as he violated her.

I was gagging on the ground. I heard Jasper. "Alice! Alice! What's wrong? What do you see?" I couldn't answer him. The images weren't done yet. I saw the same man take her to a clearing in the woods. She tried to run, but he caught her. I saw him force himself on her while she was tied down and blindfolded. I saw him drop her and I saw her cry out again. I saw her get up and attack him. Then she ran. The last thing I saw was her in our old house, and then everything went black.

Everyone was gathered around me, while Jasper held me in his lap and rocked me back and forth. I was dry sobbing. My sister was in so much pain and it was partially my fault. "Alice what happened? What did you see? Is something going to happen to Bella?" Anyone who didn't know Carlisle would say he was calm and collected, but we could tell his resolve was cracking. I took a deep breath. "Something already has happened Carlisle. Many things have happened. We need to go back. I don't care what Edward says we need to go back now!" I was screaming and I didn't ever care.

Carlisle looked at me for a moment. "Ok. Esme call the airport. Get us on a flight as soon as possible. Emmett, Rosalie go heard some dear. Edward will need to feed before we leave and we can't wait." He leaned close to Jasper and spoke softly in his ear. I wasn't listening to what he said. "I'm going to call Edward and tell him to come straight here. We can't afford to wait." Carlisle left the room leaving Jasper and me alone. "What did you see Alice? I can feel your pain. I already know it was bad." I wanted to tell him, I did, but it felt like I would be betraying her. I didn't want to share her humiliation. Besides, saying Edward was going to react poorly was an understatement. It would be best if he heard it directly from me rather than through the family. I just shook my head and burrowed into Jazz's chest. "I can't. Not yet."

I heard him sigh. "I am here when you need me. But for now let's go get ready." He pulled me up and we raced upstairs to get anything we might need for the trip. I looked into Edward's future to see if I could see his reaction to the news, but it was useless. I tried looking for Bella again, but all I got was darkness. It scared me. "I can't see her anymore Jazz. And it scares me." He pulled me into his arms and just held me. "We will be back in Forks soon and then we will do whatever it takes to help her." I didn't want to admit it, but I wasn't sure if we could help her back from this. I shuddered. "Edward will be back soon and I need to pull myself together to show him what I saw. You and Emmett need to be close by just in case. He won't handle this well."

When we had the few items we were taking with us in a carryon bag we raced back downstairs. The family was waiting for us. Esme was the first to speak. "We take off at 1:30am." I looked at the clock that was a little over 6 hours from now. "So long?" I asked. Esme looked at me kindly. "It's the flight that gets us there the fastest." She walked over and pulled me into her arms. "We all want to help her Alice." I sighed and hugged her back. "I know and I'm sorry for doubting you. I just can't help but feel this is my fault. If I hadn't made that stupid promise – " she stopped me. "This is all our faults Alice. We all left her alone, not just you."

I knew she was right, but I couldn't help how I felt. "Edward will be here in 3 minutes. I need to be the one to tell him something is wrong. He needs to see for himself otherwise he will be difficult about returning. I already told Jasper, but I think it would be best if Jasper and Emmett stayed close just in case. He is not going to like what I have to show him." Rosalie looked at me for a moment. "Is it that bad Alice?" I nodded. "It's worse." Rose and Esme looked sick. Emmett looked pissed. Jasper looked worried. And Carlisle, he looked like he was breaking inside. I know he thought of Bella as a daughter and it was killing him that she was hurting, but he was also aware of the pain this was causing the rest of his family and he couldn't do anything to make it better.

I looked around. "He'll be here in 72 seconds. Go!" Everyone disappeared. I turned my back on the door and started out the back window. I heard him open the door and walk in. "Alice? Where is everyone? Why did Carlisle tell me to come right here? I need to hunt." I didn't answer him at first. I was trying to control my voice. I was angry and worried and disgusted. I felt him move rather than heard him. When he spoke next he was directly behind me. "Alice? Are you alright?" I heard the confusion in his voice. I was keeping my mind blank. I wasn't ready to show him yet. I turned to look at him. When he saw my face he took a step back. _NO! I am anything but alright! _I screamed at him in my head. "I have something to show you and I know you won't want to see it, but since this is mostly your fault, it's something you need to see."

I let the images come back to me. It was just as disgusting the second time. I watched Edward's face. It crumpled in pain and he fell to his knees. "NO! Alice please stop it! I can't take it!" I knew I was being cruel, but he need to know what he had caused. I let the images come until there were no more. He was on his hands and knees and if he had anything in his system to throw up it would be on the floor now. I didn't speak. _Do you see what we did to her? I didn't look for her because I promised you I wouldn't and this is what I missed. We are going back whether you like it or not. We leave in 6 hours. I suggest you pull yourself together before then and go feed on the deer that Emmett and Rosalie have herded for you. And then come back so we can discuss our next move._

He stayed where he was and all he did was moan. I looked at him and sighed. "Jazz, Em, help him pull himself together and feed. He needs to be strong for Bella." They were at his side instantly and pulled him to his feet. He looked at me with broken eyes. "Go. She needs you now more than ever." He just nodded and the three of them disappeared out the back door. As soon as they were gone Esme, Carlisle and Rose appeared beside me. Carlisle looked at me. "Will he get over this Alice?" I gave him the only answer I could. "I don't know. It depends on what we find when we get home I guess." I closed my eyes and wished I could sleep. I needed the escape and I needed time to move faster.

EPOV

I was anxious. I missed my family, but I needed to know that Bella was ok. If Alice hadn't seen anything I was going to ask her to look. I just had to make sure. I stepped off the plane and turned on my phone. I had a message from Carlisle. _Son, come straight home. Don't stop to hunt. I'll explain when you get here._ I was worried. Why would he tell me to come straight home? It could be because they just wanted to see me, but coupled with the reason I came home to begin with I didn't think that was it.

It was difficult to keep a human pace through the airport. I wanted to get home as soon as possible. As soon as I was out of sight, I ran full speed. I needed to get home and find out what had happened. It seemed like an eternity before I reached the house, but it was probably only a few minutes. I walked in the house and saw Alice standing looking out the back window. "Alice? Where is everyone? Why did Carlisle tell me to come right here? I need to hunt." When she didn't answer I listened to her thoughts, only there was nothing there. She wasn't thinking anything, which is a very difficult thing to do. I moved closer to her. "Alice? Are you alright?" I was confused. Why was she so shut down? She turned and looked me in the eyes. I took a step back. She was angry, but also I saw a deep pain in her eyes. I could think of only one reason she would look like that.

_NO! I am anything but alright!_ She screamed at me. "I have something to show you and I know you won't want to see it, but since this is mostly your fault, it's something you need to see." I was scared now. I knew whatever she was going to show me would be bad but I wasn't prepared for what actually came. It took me a moment to understand what I was seeing, but when it finally clicked I wished to God that it hadn't. My face fell. This was the worst pain imaginable. I fell to my knees and begged her to stop. "NO! Alice please stop it! I can't take it!" I was dry heaving on the ground. I was so disgusted by what I was seeing. My beautiful Bella! What had I done?!

_Do you see what we did to her? I didn't look for her because I promised you I wouldn't and this is what I missed. We are going back whether you like it or not. We leave in 6 hours. I suggest you pull yourself together before then and go feed on the deer that Emmett and Rosalie have herded for you. And then come back so we can discuss our next move._ I heard her thoughts, but I couldn't respond. I was in shock, if that was even possible. I heard her sigh. "Jazz, Em, help him pull himself together and feed. He needs to be strong for Bella." They were at my side instantly. I couldn't even stand on my own.

They pulled me to my feet and I looked at Alice. "Go. She needs you now more than ever." I just nodded. I had to be strong for my Bella. The three of us raced out the back door. I followed the scent to a herd of deer. I was on autopilot. I drank my fill. I turned to go back to the house, and found my way blocked by my brothers. They both just looked at me. Emmett spoke first. "What did Alice see? She wouldn't tell us because she wanted to tell you first, but we need to know." He had a point. They should know what we were walking into, but I couldn't bring myself to tell them. "I can't tell you. It has to be Bella's decision to share. I will tell you that it is worse than what happened to Rose." Emmett and Jasper both hissed. I thought we were done, but now it was Jazz's turn to speak.

"I know you are hurting right now Edward, but you need to pull yourself together and figure out a way to make things right with Bella. Beg, grovel, and plead. I don't care how you do it, but you need to fix things with her. This family hasn't been right since we left and that's because we left a member behind. This isn't just about you anymore. We all love her like a sister so you need to fix it and fast." I just nodded. Jasper was right. I did need her. I couldn't live without her and I will do whatever it takes to show her that. We all turned and headed back to the house to wait for our flight.

**A few hours later**

We had spent the last 5 hours catching up. They told me what they had been doing and I listened. I didn't offer any information on what I was doing, and they didn't ask. I had nothing to share and they knew it. It was one o'clock when Alice said we needed to leave. We didn't bother with cars; we would have them shipped back to Forks later. We ran to the airport and boarded our plane. It was a relatively short flight, but it felt much too long. I wanted to see Bella. I needed to hold her in my arms and tell her that everything would be ok. I asked Alice if she had seen anything else, but she told me all she saw was black. This didn't make me feel better.

When the plane landed it was 2:30 in the morning. We ran to our house because that is where Alice had seen Bella last. As soon as we arrived I knew something was wrong. We ran into the house careful not to make noise so we didn't startle her. Her scent was everywhere, but I followed it to its most concentrated place, Alice and Jasper's room. I paused outside the door when the scent of blood overwhelmed me. I glanced down and saw a few drops of blood on the floor. It was Bella's blood. I opened the door and my eyes zeroed in on the bed. It had been slept in recently, but it was empty now.

"Edward, you need to see this." Carlisle said from the kitchen. I raced downstairs. The whole family was gathered around the table and they all looked somber. Carlisle held a sheet of paper out to me. It smelled like Bella's blood. I looked down at it. It was note written in blood.

_Just in case you even return to this place, you will never find her. She belongs to me now and we are going to have some fun. Don't waste your time looking._

My vision went red and I growled. Someone had taken my Bella from my house! This was unacceptable. Carlisle placed a hand on my shoulder. "The scent on the letter is unfamiliar to us, but maybe you recognize it." I took a deep breath. Under the sweet smell of the blood was another scent. "I don't know it, other than its human." My anger was giving way to panic. I had to find her. I looked around at my family. They all wore matching expressions of grief and anger. I locked eyes with Alice. _We will find her Edward. It will just take time._ "We don't have time to waste we need to start searching." I was desperate.

Carlisle was more level headed than I was. "We should talk to Charlie in the morning. The police may know something we don't." I sighed he was right of course, but I just wanted her home as soon as possible. "We will find her son." I looked at him. He looked so determined it was hard to doubt him. Esme came forward and enveloped me in her arms. I hugged her close and let go of my emotional control. She held me until I stopped my dry sobbing and I pulled back. I noticed that the rest of the family was gone. I hadn't noticed their departure. My mother looked at me. "You are not alone son. We will help you find her." All I could do was nod.

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A/N: A quick note about the times for the plane ride. I am only guessing on how long it takes to get from the east coast to the west coast, but also don't forget about the time zone differences. That is why it only appears to take them an hour to get to Forks; it should have been about 4. As always PUSH THE BUTTON!!…tell me what you think…and also this time it's for real…I most likely won't be posting again for 10 days or so…I have 2 exams and 2 papers…so please stick with me!


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: As always…I don't own Twilight**

A/N: Hey guys! I know you are all anxious to get to the chapter so I won't keep you here, but I'm back and I survived my week from hell…all I wanted to do was continue this story…so here goes!!!

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EPOV

Bella was gone. I left her so she would be safer and I ended up condemning her. I tried not to think about what she could be going through, but it was very difficult. I knew that if I could just hold her everything would be right in the world again. I was nothing without her and I would do whatever it takes to make her see that, but first we needed to find her. Carlisle and I left for the police station while the rest of the family discussed our search pattern for when we returned. I could only hope that Charlie had something to tell us.

I knew Charlie would be upset to see me. If anyone but Carlisle were with me I think Charlie would have tried to shoot me. We walked through the doors of the Forks Police Department to a flurry of activity. It looked like everyone on staff and more were concern about finding Bella. I searched the room for Charlie, hoping he would have some information on the whereabouts of his daughter. He found me first.

"YOU! What the fuck are you doing here?" He moved closer to us and Carlisle stepped forward. "Chief Swan, please calm down. We are here to help, if we can." Charlie's hand hovered by his belt. I think he was reaching for his gun, but it wasn't there. He continued to stare at me. "I think you've helped enough. Don't you?" I cringed. This was all my fault. Carlisle placed a hand on my shoulder. "Charlie, we don't want any trouble, but Bella is missing and we want to help. Regardless of the past. Do you have any information about her whereabouts?" Charlie looked at me a moment more before turning his attention to Carlisle.

"We don't know anything. She was a patient at the Seattle Mental Institution for the past 3 months. According to her new doctor, her orderly took her on a little trip to get her outside to see if that helped her at all. She attacked him and ran away. That was about 2 days ago. She hasn't been seen since. We tracked Matt's ATM card to the bus station, but the cashier doesn't remember where she bought a ticket to. She cleaned out his bank account though, about $1000 so she has money. She could be anywhere. I thought she would come home, but I was wrong. I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I haven't been a very good father these past few months."

Charlie paused and looked down. I could tell he felt guilty. I opened my mouth to tell him it wasn't his fault when Carlisle stopped me with a thought. _Wait. _I trusted Carlisle so I waited. When Charlie looked up again he looked right at me. "I don't like you. You left my baby girl broken in more ways than one. I have no respect for you and I don't know if you ever cared about her or if it was all some game to you. But if you did ever care about her, you will help me find her."

I was shocked. Charlie was asking for my help. Things must be worse than I thought. "I will never forgive myself for leaving. I love her with all my heart and soul. I thought she would be better off without me. I was wrong. I'm so sorry. And I WILL get a chance to tell her that. We'll bring her home Charlie, you have my word."

He looked at me. "Whatever your intentions were, I don't really care. I just want my baby girl safe at home again. Besides, if I were any kind of good father I never would have put in that place."

"This isn't your fault Charlie, it's mine."

"Damn right it's your fault! But that's beside the point. Follow me and I will tell you what we have so far." Carlisle and I followed him to the other side of the room. "This is where she disappeared and this is where the bus stop is." He pointed both locations out on the map. They were far enough apart that she couldn't have walked. I knew that. So someone had to pick her up. I couldn't help but wonder, were they kind to her? Did she feel safe? Charlie was still talking. "– contacted Phoenix police and they have a search party set up there. She would try to go somewhere she felt safe, so we assumed Phoenix was the next place after Forks and no one here has seen her." I nodded. It was a logical thought. They had no way of knowing just how wrong they were, but I wasn't going to stop them looking. Who knows, maybe they could find her.

Carlisle thanked Charlie with the promise to keep each other updated and we ran home. The family was waiting to ambush us before we walked in the door. No one spoke, but everyone's thoughts were on the same thing. _Do they know where she is? Do they know she was here?_ I shook my head twice. "They don't know anything other than she was last seen at the Seattle bus stop." This was too much. Bella was out there probably terrified, maybe even hurt. I was empty. I didn't want to feel anything. It hurt too much. I needed to be by myself so I could break down without the prying eyes of my family. I didn't say anything as I walked out the back door. I heard Carlisle tell someone to stay where they were. I reached the back lawn and ran for all I was worth; all the while hoping that God would strike my down so I wouldn't have to feel this anymore.

APOV

Edward and Carlisle left for the police station. I tried to see how it would go, but there were too many decisions to be made yet. The rest of us stayed at the house and began planning our search. We knew Bella was here last and at the most not even 24 hours ago, so this would be ground zero. Jasper took the lead on this. His military experience would be useful. "We start from here and radiate out. We are looking for anything out of the ordinary. We can't follow her scent because it disappears at the end of the drive. Look for tire tracks and get a picture if you can. Also look for signs that she struggled, but this is also doubtful. She was probably unconscious at the time. Alice, have you seen anything?"

He looked at me. I looked for Bella and all I saw was darkness. "No. It's the same as before, total darkness." Jazz didn't waste any time. "Ok then. We are looking blind, but we can assume a few things. One, we know whoever took her was human, so there is probably DNA on something in the house. If we can get a viable DNA sample, we might be able to figure out who took her. Two, humans don't drive as fast as us and she was taken at most 24 hours ago so that limits the area she could be in and they would have to stop to allow the driver to sleep, so they probably no very far." I was so anxious to start looking I was literally bouncing up and down.

Jasper looked at me for a moment before addressing the family again. "We need to wait for Carlisle to get back before we do anything. We don't know what they found out from Charlie and I am sure Carlisle will have something to say about all this." So we waited. I paced the living room looking into Bella's future for any sign that she was ok. At one point I thought I saw something, but it was only a flash of light and then it was gone. She was still alive then, at least I hoped so.

Esme excused herself to her room. I thought about how hard this all must be for her. She was destined to be a mother and now one of her daughters was in danger and she was helpless. Emmett and Jasper walked outside to blow off some steam. They would fight and I didn't need my sight to tell me the outcome. Jasper would win. I was the only one in the family to ever beat him, but I had an unfair advantage. Even Edward couldn't win, but he didn't lose. They usually tied. Rose just sat on the couch and stared. I am sure she was remembering what happened to her before she was turned, what was probably happening to Bella now. I felt sick.

Thankfully we didn't have to wait long. "They'll be here in a minute." Everyone was instantly back in the living room and waiting. We heard Carlisle and Edward race up the steps to the front door. When they entered the room no one spoke. I don't know what everyone else was thinking, but I was asking Edward if they knew anything. I guess everyone was asking the same thing. He shook his head twice to the unasked questions. "They don't know anything other than she was last seen at the Seattle bus stop." My heart sank. I had started hoping that Charlie would know something more. I even hoped a little that Charlie figured out where she was and sent someone to get her. At least she would be safe then.

I sighed. Edward looked like he was shattering before our very eyes. Wordlessly he walked to the back door and went outside. I knew he needed time to pull himself together, but Emmett made a move to follow him. Carlisle looked at him. "Stay where you are. He needs time to process all this." Emmett looked at Carlisle angrier than I have seen him in a long time. "He needs TIME! We don't have time Carlisle! Bella is out there probably terrified and maybe even hurt! He needs to pull his head out of his ass and stop thinking about himself. He's not the only one hurting right now." Everyone stared at Emmett like he had grown a second head.

I knew that Emmett loved Bella like a sister, but his outburst was still unexpected. He sighed. "I'm sorry. I'm not angry with you or even with him really. He did what he thought was the best thing. It's not his fault that it backfired in the worst possible way. I just want her home safe." Carlisle smiled at Emmett. "We all want that Emmett and there is nothing to forgive. We all love Bella and want her safe and whole again."

Carlisle didn't waste any time in filling us with what Charlie said. They really didn't know anything. When he was finished no one moved for a moment. Carlisle looked at me. "Go get Edward. You know him better than anyone. Help him pull himself together. He is more attuned to Bella than any of us. If we want to be successful we will need him." I turned to leave, but Carlisle stopped. "Wait one moment Alice. There is one more thing that you should all be aware of. You know Bella was in a mental institution, but we don't know what her current state of mind is. If we find her she may not want to see us. She may even try to hurt herself. So if you find her, use extreme caution." My heart broke. Esme voiced what was all our greatest hope. "It doesn't matter how she is now. Once she is back with her family everything will be fine." I sincerely hoped she was right. I turned and raced out the back door to find my brother.

BPOV

I was dreaming. I knew because Edward was with me and he was singing.

_Dear my love, haven't you wanted to be with me  
And dear my love, haven't you longed to be free  
I can't keep pretending that I don't even know you  
And at sweet night, you are my own  
Take my hand_

We're leaving here tonight  
There's no need to tell anyone  
They'd only hold us down  
So by the morning light  
We'll be halfway to anywhere  
Where love is more than just your name

I have dreamt of a place for you and I  
No one know who we are there  
All I want is to give my life only to you  
I've dreamt so long I cannot dream anymore  
Let's run away, I'll take you there

Forget this life  
Come with me  
Don't look back you're safe now  
Unlock your heart  
Drop your guard  
No one's left to stop you

Forget this life  
Come with me  
Don't look back you're safe now  
Unlock your heart  
Drop your guard  
No one's left to stop you now

I woke with a start and realized three things before I even opened my eyes. One there were tears on my face. The dream was everything I wanted, Edward to come back for me. Two, I was soaking wet and freezing. And three, my head was killing me. I opened my eyes and only darkness greeted me. I reached up to try and take it off and I found my hands were tied behind my back. I didn't know where I was. I remember lying in bed at the Cullen's and hearing a noise and then nothing. I rolled onto my side and groaned. I didn't know how long I was lying there, but I was stiff as a board.

"Welcome back my Bella. You were asleep for so long I thought I may have hit you too hard." He laughed. I froze. It was the some voice that haunted me for the last month. Matthew Park. I started crying again. I should have killed him when I had the chance. Now he was going to hurt me more than before, maybe even kill me. I should have been terrified at the thought of dying, but it gave me an odd sense of peace. If I were dead he couldn't hurt me anymore. Maybe I could piss him off enough that he would kill me before getting a chance to rape me again. Anything was better than that.

I stopped crying. "You fucking bastard! Let me go! I'll kill you when I get out of here!" I heard him move and then he kicked me in the gut. Hard. "Shut the fuck you bitch! You aren't getting out of here. Ever. No one knows you're here. They all think you ran away. You belong to me now you little slut!" He kicked me again and again. The pain was worse than anything I had felt before, but I didn't care. He was angry and that was good. "You are a weak, pathetic, loser! You can't get a normal girl so you are forced to rape your charges. I wonder why that is. Well I already know you're small. So maybe you can get dates but when it comes time to seal the deal they just laugh and walk away, or maybe you're just a pity fuck and they never return your calls."

He grabbed my throat and pulled me upright. "SHUT THE FUCK UP!" He was really pissed now, only a little farther. "Oh did I touch a nerve there Mattie? I'm sorry. Well if that's not that reason let's think of what else it could be. Do you still live with your mother? I bet that's it. You're a momma's boy. Or maybe they take one look at you and want to gouge their eyes out!" He was choking me. I couldn't breathe and in that one moment I was beyond thankful. "You stupid little bitch. I will kill you for that, but not before I have some fun with you. Besides I have explicit instructions."

He dropped me. I lay on the ground coughing and drawing in deep breaths. My throat burned and the tears began to fall again. He had more control than I thought. I guess God really did hate me. I couldn't even die with whatever dignity I had left. He was going to take it all. I was so busy relearning how to breathe that I almost forgot what he said. "Instructions? Who are you working with?" I felt him kneel next to me and he started removing my pants. "Like I would tell you that. Let's just say it's someone who hates you even more than I do."

I was so busy trying to think who it could be that I didn't realize he had removed my panties until a finger slammed into me. I screamed. "Ah music to my ears. Since I can't actually have sex for a few more days we get to explore all the things we didn't get to try before. I will make you beg for it like the slut that you are." He added another finger and began moving in and out of me. It hurt. Before long he added a third finger and was slamming in and out as fast as possible. He was actually scratching me inside. It was excruciating. I couldn't help the screams that poured from my hoarse throat.

"Will you please shut her the fuck up? She's annoying as fuck." I stopped screaming and Matt pulled his fingers out. I had heard that voice before. "You told me I could do whatever I wanted as long as it didn't draw blood or kill her. Were you lying?" Matt was still touching my leg while he was talking. As soon as he asked the question he was gone. I heard a growl. "Do not question me! I said you can do what you like and you can, but right now I want to meet our guest. Besides she's been screaming for the past 10 minutes. It's annoying." While she was talking I tried wiggling my head to slip the blindfold off. I had to be sure. I was so close. I could see light. "I wouldn't do that if I were you." The blindfold as repositioned over my eyes and retied.

"Who are you?" I was fairly certain I knew the answer to that question, but I needed to be sure. "You mean you don't remember me? I'm crushed. Maybe you'll remember this." She reached down and snapped my leg. I let out an ear splitting shriek. It was exactly what James had done to me. "Remember now bitch?! Your Edward killed my mate. He will pay dearly for that and you are the price." My leg was on fire. I was panting the pain was so bad. I felt the world start to go fuzzy and the last thing I remember thinking was _I wonder why Victoria is working with a human._ Then the pain became too much and I let the darkness take me.

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A/N: Does this make up for the 10 day absence?? I hope so…you all know the drill by now…tell me how much you hate it or love it. I can't do better if I don't know what I did wrong in the first place. PUSH THE BUTTON!! Thanks!

FYI: the song is: Anywhere by Evanescence


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

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EPOV

I don't know how long I was running, but I stopped when I could no longer hear my family and they could no longer hear me. I feel to my knees and let the emotions I had been trying to keep inside flow free. I let out a roar louder than any before. I was angry. How dare someone try to keep my Bella from me?! I would find whoever was responsible and they would be lucky if I killed them quickly. I was seething, but just as quickly as the anger came it was buried under grief.

This was all my fault. I would never forgive myself and I was afraid that Bella would never forgive me either, not that I deserved her forgiveness. The images Alice showed me were on permanent replay in my mind. I knew it wasn't good to dwell on what happened to her, but it seemed like a fitting punishment for me. If Bella had to go through, I at least owed it to her not to cringe away from the truth, no matter how much it killed me.

I heard movement in the trees and with no other warning than a slight breeze Alice was beside me. She didn't say anything, but she was thinking very loudly. _Edward, I know you're hurting. We all are. But you need to pull yourself together and be strong. We need to start looking for Bella and you are more in tune with her than we are. We can't find her without you. We need you. SHE needs you._ She was right of course. I was attuned to Bella. I could pick her heart beat out of a crowd with no difficultly, which would be very helpful in our coming search. And her scent. I would never forget that. I was the best person to look for her if we had any chance of finding her soon.

I picked myself up off the ground and turned to Alice. She gave me a small smile. "Come on brother. Let's go bring her home." She took my hand and we ran home in silence. The family was waiting for us in the living room. No one said anything, but Carlisle nodded to let me know that he understood. Jasper wasted no time in catching me up. "Ok we need to split up. It's likely that whoever took her went north to Canada or east to Seattle. It's also unlikely that they plan to stay in one place so we need to move quickly. Emmett, Edward, Alice and I will go to Seattle. Carlisle, Esme and Rose will head to Vancouver. Everyone needs to keep their phones close in case Alice sees something and we need to reach you quickly."

When Jasper finished his plan everyone nodded their agreement. He didn't have to say out loud why Emmett and he were coming with me. I could pick it out of his thoughts. _God forbid we find something bad Emmett and I will have the best chance of stopping him from doing something stupid._ I growled low in my chest. As if anyone could stop me from following Bella. Jasper didn't take offense. He looked apologetic. _Sorry, but it's true and you know that Carlisle and Esme would be devastated if you took yourself out. And Alice would never get over it so you're stuck with us. But let's not worry about that now._ I just nodded. He was right of course, not that that chanced anything. If Bella was no longer in this world I would follow her as fast as possible.

Emmett was getting antsy. "Let's go already. We're wasting time standing here talking!" And on that note we all were set in motion. The four of us going to Seattle piled into Emmett's Jeep and flew out of the garage. Carlisle, Esme and Rose piled into Carlisle's Mercedes and tore out after us. It seemed everyone was anxious to find Bella. Emmett wasted no time in getting the Jeep up to a steady 120mph. I leaned my head against the seat and closed my eyes wishing, not for the first time, that sleep could claim me. No one spoke and I didn't listen to their thoughts. I used the two hours ride to pull my head together. As we reached the city Alice was the first one to speak. "What's the plan Jazz?" We all looked to Jasper while Emmett pulled into a parking garage. "We split up, Alice with me and Emmett with Edward. If anyone finds anything call the others and wait until we are together. We meet back here in an hour."

I could have argued that I didn't need a babysitter and we could cover more ground alone, but it would only have wasted more time. Time we didn't have. "Emmett, make sure you have your phone on. Just in case." With a quick glace in my direction Alice and Jasper took off. I knew Alice would try her hardest to find her. Not that Jasper or Emmett wouldn't, but Alice was the only other one who knew what happened to her. Emmett and Jasper had an idea but no details. I looked at Emmett who just nodded and then we both took off in the opposite direction.

The plan was just to run through the city and hope that we picked up her scent or hope that someone was thinking about where she was. We ran through half the city and I started to give up hope. There was no sign of her anywhere. I couldn't even have Emmett call Carlisle. They probably weren't there yet. We reached the end of our half and turned to run a different path back when I froze. That scent. I knew that scent. It was the best and worst thing I had even smelled. It was my Bella. Emmett caught it too and had his phone in his hand before I could bark at him. He spoke too fast for me to follow. I was too focused on the smell. It was my lifeline.

Emmett hung up the phone. "Alice and Jasper are meeting us there. Apparently Alice saw us there and they are close by." All I could do was nod. We took off running following that sweet smell. It led us to an abandoned warehouse on the edge of the industrial area. Alice and Jasper were waiting for us. Alice looked as anxious as I felt. I could hear a heartbeat inside, but it wasn't Bella's. But that was her scent. I couldn't stand here anymore. I took off and was through the door before my family had even moved. I stopped just through the door. It was like getting punched in the stomach. The scent was so strong. I looked for its beautiful source. The room was empty.

Jasper and Emmett was beside me in an instant. Alice ran across the room and up the stairs to an office. She returned with a man in her arms. "This was the heartbeat we heard. But it's definitely Bella's blood. It's all over the floor." The man was terrified. His heart was racing. Alice set him down and untied his hands and removed the gag. "Oh thank god! She told me you would come, but I didn't believe her. She- she what was she? Her eyes…were red." We all froze. This man obviously had some contact with a vampire and that meant that Bella was in the hands of some malicious vampire.

Emmett started at the human. "Did she say who she was or where she was going?" The man just shook his head. "She hardly spoke to me other than to tell me that when the ones with yellow eyes came I should tell them to play the video." He looked to his left and we all followed his stare. I walked at a human pace over to the TV. I needed to know what was so important about this tape, but at the same time I didn't think I could press the button. My siblings were suddenly at my side. Alice reached forward and pressed play. My world collapsed and my vision bled to red.

APOV

Edward was faster than anyone. I knew he wanted to get far enough away to be unheard, but apparently he didn't go far enough. I heard a roar so loud I'm sure the rest of the family heard it in the house. This was killing him. If we didn't find Bella I didn't need a vision of the future to tell me that Edward would never recover. I came upon him in a clearing. I know he heard me, but he gave no indication that I was there. I didn't speak but I know he heard me anyway.

_Edward, I know you're hurting. We all are. But you need to pull yourself together and be strong. We need to start looking for Bella and you are more in tune with her than we are. We can't find her without you. We need you. SHE needs you. _He didn't say anything. He just picked himself up and looked at me. I gave him a tiny smile. "Come on brother. Let's go bring her home." I reached out and took his hand and we ran home in silence. The family was waiting in the living room. I left Edward's side and went to Jasper. I saw Carlisle nod to Edward and then Jasper started outlining the plan. I can only assume they talked about this when I was getting Edward.

"Ok we need to split up. It's likely that whoever took her went north to Canada or east to Seattle. It's also unlikely that they plan to stay in one place so we need to move quickly. Emmett, Edward, Alice and I will go to Seattle. Carlisle, Esme and Rose will head to Vancouver. Everyone needs to keep their phones close in case Alice sees something and we need to reach you quickly." Everyone nodded in agreement. I knew why Jazz wanted certain people with Edward. And Edward knew it too. He growled at what I can only assume was something Jasper thought. I tensed for a moment. Edward wasn't in his right mind and I was worried he might take a swipe at Jasper.

Jasper must have changed his mind because Edward nodded and Emmett set us all in motion. "Let's go already. We're wasting time standing here talking!" We raced out the door and into our respective cars. It was a silent drive to Seattle. When we got close to the city I knew we needed to talk about what the plan was so I asked Jasper. "What's the plan Jazz?" He looked at me while Emmett parked the car. "We split up, Alice with me and Emmett with Edward. If anyone finds anything call the others and wait until we are together. We meet back here in an hour. Emmett, make sure you have your phone on. Just in case." I glanced at Edward expecting him to argue with having a babysitter, but he didn't so Jazz and I took off.

We raced through the city moving too fast to be seen by humans. There was not even a hint of Bella anywhere. I kept looking into her future, as well as Edward's, hoping to see something. On our way back to the car I saw Edward enter a building. I looked harder and I saw the address. "It looks like Edward may have found something. Let's go." Jasper didn't even ask what I saw, he just followed my lead. We raced through the heart of Seattle and reached the location first. I was so anxious to go inside and see her. I didn't want to wait for Edward to get here even though based on the call from Emmett they would be here shortly. I felt Jasper slide his arms around my waist. I leaned back against his chest.

"I'm scared Jazz." He kissed the top of my head. "I know baby, but so is she. She'll need you to be strong for her. No matter what." I sighed. "What is we can't help her back from this?" Now it was Jasper's turn to sigh. "I don't know what will happen, but I do know that you love her and she loves you. We will all be there for her in whatever way she needs us to be and she will recover from this. She's a tough one." I heard the boys coming so I pulled away from Jasper. We would need to move.

Edward paused by our side, but moved inside before any of us took a step. We all raced after him and stopped just inside the door. It smelled so good in here. I knew it was Bella's blood and I looked over to check on Jasper. He met my gaze and smiled at bit to let me know he was in control. I did a quick survey of the room and saw the office across the warehouse floor and up a set of stairs. I was running for that room with everything I had. I threw open the door and my eyes immediately fell on the person in the corner. It wasn't the one I wanted to see. He was an average looking man, about 25-30 years old. His wrists were bound and he was gagged. He looked terrified.

I picked him and ran back to the boys. No need to keep them waiting. As I passed the center of the room the smell of Bella's blood increased and I knew that's where it was coming from. "This was the heartbeat we heard. But it's definitely Bella's blood. It's all over the floor." I set the man down and untied his hands and took the gag out. "Oh thank god! She told me you would come, but I didn't believe her. She- she what was she? Her eyes…were red." We all froze. This wasn't good. It could only mean one thing. Bella was being held by a vampire.

Emmett started at the human. "Did she say who she was or where she was going?" The man just shook his head. "She hardly spoke to me other than to tell me that when the ones with yellow eyes came I should tell them to play the video." He looked to his left and we all followed his stare. Edward walked over at a human pace over to the TV. He didn't push the button immediately and I knew he was struggling. We all surrounded him in the next moment and I pushed the play button. When the first image filled the screen I collapsed against Jasper. It was worse than we thought.

BPOV

Time had no meaning. I knew nothing of the outside world. I only knew pain and fear. My leg was screaming in pain, but that didn't stop Matt. I knew we had moved from where ever we were before. I briefly woke up in a car and immediately started screaming in pain. Victoria reached back and shut me up pretty quickly. I had no idea where I was, or even when it was. Already it felt like I had been in the dark for months. Matt was fully functional again as he was happy to demonstrate the instant I woke up. Actually he had no problem having some fun while I was unconscious.

I could only guess that was earlier today. I had woken up to grunting, pain, and the melody of my lullaby in the background. It took me a minute to understand what was happening and when I did I wished I was still unconscious. Matt was pounding in and out of me and he wasn't being careful with my leg. If the pain and humiliation of rape wasn't enough, he was killing my already broken leg. I screamed myself hoarse before he finished.

He took the blindfold off after he finished though. The only reason I knew it was I saw a pool of light when he left. Otherwise the room was as black as when my eyes were covered. I lay on the cold hard floor and waited for death to find me. It had to be better than this excuse of an existence.

Victoria came in a while after Matt left. "Well well. How is our guest of honor doing?" She laughed. "Why are you doing this to me?!" She laughed harder. "You stupid little girl. Your mate killed my James and I want him to hurt like I hurt." I steeled myself to the pain the next statement would bring. "Edward left me. He isn't my mate anymore. So all this won't hurt him at all. He doesn't care about me."

"Silly girl. Vampires mate for life. This will hurt him more than you know." That simple statement filled me with hope. Hope was a dangerous thing for me. "Well if that's true than Edward will kill you for this!" I hoped she would just let me go and leave me alone. I should have known better. "No he won't." I froze. "Why not?" She started laughing again. "Because I left him a little present in Seattle and if all went according to plan he thinks you're dead. If Edward Cullen is anything like I think he is, he is half way to Italy by now." I don't know if I should blame the constant darkness, the lack of food, the intense pain, or the continued rape, but I started to laugh.

"Edward wouldn't go to the Volturi for me…not anymore." I still couldn't see, but she could. She kicked me in the ribs hard enough to crack a few. "I know what I'm talking about you stupid bitch. I am impressed you figured it out so quickly though. But that's beside the point. Edward thinks you're dead and therefore will want to take himself out of this world and once he's gone I can use you to take out the rest of his loathsome family. Now should I send Matt back down? It's been about 4 hours since he last saw you. I'm sure he's ready for the next round and I think he even might bring a friend this time." I saw the pool of light again that signaled the opening of the door and she left, laughing the whole time.

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A/N: Before you hunt me down with an angry mob, the next chapter will reveal what was on the tape…now, I don't have much to say about this chapter…I think it speaks for itself, but tell me what you think. The response to this story has been amazing and you guys totally rock with reviewing, but I am getting quite a few story alerts and not as many reviews...so I am hoping to break 100 reviews with this chapter...I know you can do it just PLEASE PUSH THE BUTTON!!!


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight…**

A/N: You guys are amazing!! We made it to 100 reviews and as a reward here is the next chapter! Enjoy!

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EPOV

Four months. It has been four months since we found the warehouse. There has been no sign of Bella since then. I was going insane. I didn't even know is she was alive. That was the worst part I think. If I knew for sure she was gone I could follow, but not knowing left me with a tiny shard of hope. Hope. Everyone clings to it like some sort of savior, but I knew it for what it was, a demon. An evil demon that destroys lives more often than it helps them. My personal demon came in the form of that blasted tape. Even now I cringe with the memory of it.

_*********Flashback********_

_I walked at a human pace over to the TV. I needed to know what was so important about this tape, but at the same time I didn't think I could press the button. My siblings were suddenly at my side. Alice reached forward and pressed play. My world collapsed and my vision bled to red. The image on the screen hit me like a ton of bricks. My Bella was dead. It was my worst fear come to life. She lay on the ground unmoving. Before I could take it all in the picture shifted to Victoria._

"_Your pet is dead. You saw the evidence for yourself, and I wonder what you will do now. Will you, Edward Cullen, go running to the Volturi or will you avenge your mate's demise? I can't help but hope to have a hand in your death as well so I'm selfishly hoping you will hunt me. But just in case your grief is too much here's a little incentive." _

_The picture flashed again to Bella struggling under the same man Alice had seen before. The pictures came faster now. Victoria breaking her leg. Matthew Park violating her again and again. And if the picture weren't enough, the sound would have killed me where I stood, if I wasn't already dead. I heard her screams as she was raped and beaten, but that wasn't the worst part. The last image the video showed was another shot of my dead love, a close up of her beautiful face. Then the screen went black._

_I feel to my knees and immediately began planning. Yes I wanted to go to Volterra but I could not let this go. I would avenge my Bella. Victoria and that human would pay for this. I heard Alice sobbing into Jasper's chest. Me, I was silent. There were no words for this feeling. Thankfully Emmett and Jasper were just as silent. If someone tried to comfort me I would rip their head off. It was Jasper that broken the silence. His words barely registered. I heard Alice stop crying. "Oh my God! Edward, she's not dead!" She was lying. I had seen the proof for myself. My Bella was dead. _

"_Edward, listen to me! Bella is not dead! She's alive!" I looked up at her. "No Alice. She's –" I couldn't say it. Saying it made it real. "Edward, look at the damn tape!" Alice was angry. "I've seen enough." Alice grabbed my chin and turned it in the direction of the television. "Look damn it!" I pulled away. Why was she so insistent on showing me this again? I sighed and gave in. It didn't matter anyway. Nothing could hurt more than this. "Alright Alice, What am I looking for?" She looked at Jasper. "Play it." The video started a few seconds before the end. "Watch her eyes. There!" Alice was practically jumping up and down. I froze. "Play it again." Jasper didn't ask questions. "Again!" I watched that same spot five times. It was always the same. There, at the very end of the tape, my Bella moved her eyes. It was a tiny movement, too small for human eyes to see, but her eyes moved under her eyelids._

_**********_End flashback***********

And just that quickly, my own personal demon took up residence in my chest. I started hoping. Maybe she was alive after all. No matter how much time went by or how much my head told me otherwise, hope was always there with _what if she's alive and you are abandoning her?_ I hated it and needed it at the same time.

The police were having no more luck than we were. Charlie kept us updated, but his superiors were breathing down his neck about resources. They thought it was a lost cause. So Charlie decided to take some time off and continue the search on his own. He wasn't finding anything and he was losing hope. Maybe that was kinder. If Charlie thought she was gone he could grieve and more on. Human could do that. I couldn't.

Meanwhile, Carlisle and Jasper were coordinating our search. They hadn't lost hope. Carlisle was calling in favors from vampires all over the world and Jasper spoke to some of the nomads he befriended from before he found Alice. Emmett and Rose were currently on the East coast following up on a lead from one of Carlisle's acquaintances. They checked in on a regular basis.

Alice was devastated. But she continued to look for Bella's future. It wasn't promising. She still couldn't see anything. Which meant Bella was dead, or couldn't make any decisions. Neither of which made me feel any better. As for myself, I was utterly useless. I wandered around the house like a zombie, ironic is you ask me. I spent as much time alone as possible, but I was always reachable. I needed to be in case anyone heard anything about Bella. I tried to find ways to be closer to her. I went to our meadow. I played her lullaby. I even snuck into her room when Charlie was sleeping. I prayed to whatever god would listen to a soulless monster that she would survive this. I begged, bargained and pleaded.

I was lying on her bed when my phone went off. It was Alice. _"Edward, come home now."_ I leapt out the window and was running in the next instant. "What is it Alice? What happened?" She was silent for a moment then she spoke to Esme in the background. _"When? Ok good. Change of plans Edward. Meet us at the airport."_ I was getting angry. "ALICE! What happened?" She sighed. _"I had a vision. I'll explain more when I see you, but we are flying to Boston. The plane leaves in 1 hour. Get to the airport. I have to call Rose."_ She hung up without so much as a goodbye. I put my phone away and changed directions. That damn demon flared up again. If the whole family was flying out, did that mean they found her?

APOV

I hadn't lost hope. Even after four months I still believed she was alive. She was strong. The whole family was a mess, but we stayed strong for her and for Edward. He wasn't coping at all really. He was a shell of his former self. We had brought the tape back to show the others. They needed to know. Their reactions were to be expected. Rose punched the wall. The hole was still there. Esme sobbed. Carlisle's reaction was the most surprising. He is normally so composed and in control. He threw the chair he was sitting on through the window. That was replaced, strictly for the sake of appearances.

This whole situation was taking its toll on us. I hardly did anything but stand and stare, looking for something in Bella's future. I also kept an eye on Edward's. His future was very unclear. It depended too much on what happened to Bella. Jasper and Carlisle were calling in favors. Emmett and Rosalie were currently in South Carolina following up on a rumor of a vampire with wild red hair. Edward was lost. I think the not knowing was slowing driving him insane.

I was hunting with Jasper. It was one of the few times I wasn't actively looking into the future. I had just drained my second deer when the vision hit me. It was exactly what I had been looking for! I couldn't see much, but I saw Bella and another stranger, only this time he was showing her something. I concentrated harder. A driver's license! He was showing her his license. I looked harder. I could see the address. Boston! Bella was in Boston, or at least that was where the man was from and he knew where Bella was.

I came out of the vision with Jasper's arms around my waist. "What did you see?" I pulled away from him and took out my phone. "It's Bella. She's alive. We need to get home now!" We ran like the devil himself was chasing us. We raced in the back door. "Esme! Get us on the next flight to Boston. We found her!" Thankfully no one asked what I saw. "Where's Edward?" I looked around. He was gone. Carlisle answered me. "He's at Bella's." I pulled out my phone and dialed his number. He answered on the first ring. I didn't wait for him to say hello.

"Edward, come home now." I heard rushing wind and I knew he was running. _"What is it Alice? What happened?"_ Before I could answer him Esme was back with our flight information. I looked at her. "When?"

"We leave in an hour. And I got Emmett and Rose on the next flight to Boston from Charleston. It leaves in two hours."

"Ok good. Change of plans Edward. Meet us at the airport." _"ALICE! What happened?"_ I sighed. He was angry, but I didn't want to tell him over the phone. "I had a vision. I'll explain more when I see you, but we are flying to Boston. The plane leaves in 1 hour. Get to the airport. I have to call Rose." I hung up without saying goodbye and called Rose. "Rose, listen you and Emmett need to get to the Charleston airport. Your flight leaves in two hours." _"Alice you found her?!" _I sighed. "Yes. Now can you make it to the airport in time?" She asked Emmett who I presume was driving. _"Yes no problem. Where are we going?"_ "Boston. We'll meet you there. Be safe."

I hung up and looked at my parents. Esme buried herself in Carlisle's chest. She was crying again, only this time I think they were happy tears. Now that everyone was on their way to where they were supposed to be, I filled them in on my vision. When I was finished, no one spoke. Carlisle looked at the clock. "We need to go." He was right. Our flight was leaving in less than an hour and we needed to be on it.

BPOV

Time had no meaning anymore. The only reason I knew time was passing at all was because I was getting thinner and my hair was getting longer. It was down to my shoulders now. Shorter than it was before I cut it, but long enough that matt took advantage of it. I was in the dark so much that the light actually hurt my eyes. And light usually meant the worst was coming. Victoria never used light so I had no indication that she was coming, but Matt needed the light and he was doing much more than breaking my body. He was breaking my spirit and my mind. Victoria breaking my bones I could handle.

Light wasn't my only indication that he was coming though. Now every time he used me, he put on music beforehand, and not just any music, my music, my lullaby. How I hated that song now. I wish Edward had never written it for me so that it could never have been used against me. I had no idea how long I had been down here, but I knew it was a while, months maybe. I tried counting the days by the number of meals I got. I assumed they only fed me once a day, but I wasn't sure and I would always lose count and have to start again so it was useless. I wondered if people were looking for me. In the time between my screaming in pain and humiliation, I dreamed about getting out.

Every dream I had centered on Edward. I know he doesn't care about me anymore, but he is my knight in shining armor. He made me feel like a princess, like I was the most special person in the world, like I was his world. And I, like the fool I am, believed him. I hoped with all my heart that what he said was true and that when he left it was all a lie, but hope was my enemy. Hope was dangerous. It would crush me faster than Victoria.

Matt must have been getting board. He started bringing people to watch was he violated me and then he offered them a turn. Most took him up on his offer, but there were a few who just watched. Some never came back, and some came back often. Those who came back always took a turn, except one. One man continued to come back, but never once touched me. I didn't know his name, but I could breathe a little easier on days when he was there. I knew there would be no second round and for that I was grateful.

Today was one of those days. The music flowed through the speakers and the lights came on. Matt and his "friend" walked down the stairs and stopped across the room. It was the man that never touched me. They looked like they were having an argument. They stopped talking and both turned to look at me. Matt walked across the room and kicked me in the ribs. "Today's your lucky day bitch. My friend here wants to test you out, but he's a bit shy. So I am going to leave you two love birds alone for a while. But don't worry sweetheart, I'll be back a little later." He turned and walked across the room and up the stairs without a second glance.

The man in question walked toward me. I didn't even try and crawl away. My chest of on fire and I couldn't breathe. "Are you alright? I'm really sorry. I told him to just leave you to me, but he wouldn't listen. I want to help you, but you need to answer some questions for me first." I stared at him. No one ever talked to me but Matt and he was usually yelling at me. I didn't answer him. "Bella, can you do that? Will you answer some questions for me?"

"H – How do you know my name?" Matt didn't tell anyone who I was in case they somehow knew me. "I saw you on the news a few months ago. I wasn't sure if it was you or not. You are so much skinnier now and your hair is shorter, plus I usually couldn't see your eyes. That's why I kept coming back so much. I needed to be sure." I stared at him. This had to be a dream. No one was looking for me. Edward probably didn't know I was missing and Charlie and Renee both washed their hands of me when they put me in that place. I started to cry. "Why are you crying? It will be okay now. I promise." I shook my head. "This is a dream. It has to be. No one cares where I am. Not anymore." He reached out and wiped my tears away. "That's not true Bella. Your father and the Forks police have been searching for you for months."

"How long have I been here?" I looked at me for a moment. "Well I don't know how long you were here before I came along, but I know for sure 3 months and you have been missing for just over 4." A thought suddenly struck me. "Is she here?" I was panicked. If Victoria heard us she would kill him. "Who, the red head? No, I told Matt she made me nervous so he only brings me here when she's gone. She's not human is she?" I let go of the breath I was holding and shook my head. "I thought so. Her eyes gave her away. Bella listen to me very carefully. I live close by, I can deal with Matt and take you with me, but I need your help." I stopped him before he went on.

"No." He looked shocked. "What do you mean no? You can't want to stay in this place." I took a deep breath. This stranger was offering me everything I wanted, and I was going to pass it up. "I mean I can't come with you. You're right, Victoria isn't human and if I escape she will hunt you down and make you beg for death. I won't do that to another person. Ever. There is one way you can help me though. If I can get away from them on my own I will need a place to go. It's very unlikely, but you never know." He looked at me like I was crazy and honestly I probably was. Other people had screwed me over in more ways than one, and here I was still concerned for someone other than myself. He pulled out his wallet and showed me his license.

"Well Paul, thanks for the offer and I may take you up on it if I get out of here, but when you leave, don't come back. You may not get another chance." He looked at me one last time, got up, walked across the room and pounded on the door. It was opened almost instantly. Matt sneered at me from across the room. "That was quick. Was she any good?" Paul glared at him. "Please. Don't insult me. She's too weak. I like a more substantial woman. Even alone she held no appeal to me."

Matt just laughed. "I've told you before. Don't think of her like a woman, she's just a toy put here for our amusement." Paul gave him another withering look. "Still, not gonna happen buddy. Sorry." Matt shook his head. "Hey man no problem. You can show yourself out right? I have some business to take care of down here." Paul glanced over at me. "Sure man no problem. Just remember what you told me. If you kill her Victoria is going to be pissed and that is one chick you don't want to have mad at you." Matt just laughed again. "No worries. I won't kill her. I hate her too much for that."

"What did she ever do to you, if you don't mind me asking?" Matt stopped laughing and glared at me from across the room. "Nothing, man, she did nothing to me personally, but all women are whores at heart. I'm doing whoever her Edward is a favor by teaching her a lesson. Not that she will ever see him again, but she would have cheated eventually, all bitches do." Paul shook his head. "You my friend have some issues you need to work out." Matt laughed again. "Yeah I guess I do. If you don't mind, I'm gonna go get started on some of those issues right now." Matt turned away and walked over to me. I looked past him to Paul who looked at me, shook his head, mouthed _I'm sorry_ and walked away. I was an idiot. I was never getting out of here alive. I closed my eyes and waited for the inevitable.

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A/N: *hides behind Emmett* Don't hate me! I wrote this while listening to the score of New Moon…which is amazing by the way…but that's beside the point…push the button and tell me what you think…I would really really like to get to 120 reviews this time around…I know you can all do it!! JUST PUSH THE BUTTON!!!!!! Thanks!


	16. Chapter 16

A/N: I'm sorry!!! I know it's been two weeks since my last update, but I was at home for Thanksgiving break and my house was the place to be apparently and I didn't get anything done. So I hope this makes up for it. Enjoy!

**Disclaimer: i don't own Twilight...sigh**

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EPOV

I raced to the airport and met my family in the terminal. Everyone was whispering too fast for any human to follow. Alice looked up and met my eyes. She nodded once to let me know she saw me and then turned back to Carlisle. Before I could ask why we were going to Boston on such short notice, the attendant called for the final boarding of our flight. Everyone moved at once. I wanted to be stubborn. I wanted to stay where I was until I got an explanation, but I that was selfish. They wouldn't hold the plane for me and if Alice had indeed found Bella I needed to be there.

I followed my family onto the plane and slide into the vacant seat next to Alice. She had some explaining to do. Before I could even open my mouth she turned and looked at me. "I know you want to know what happened, and I will tell you, I promise, but we need to get in the air first." I stared at her for a moment longer, trying to see if she was avoiding the issue, but she seemed sincere. I nodded and settled back in my seat and began counting down until the flight was over.

After the flight attendants began serving drinks, Alice turned to me again. "I saw Bella in a room with a stranger." I immediately tensed. I was afraid of what she would tell me next. "The man was showing her something. At first I couldn't tell what it was, but when I concentrated I saw his driver's license. We have his address." I sat frozen in my seat. We had an address. We knew where she was. I was going to see my Bella again. "The only problem is we don't know if Bella is at the address I saw or somewhere else, but either way we will find her soon. She'll either be there or this man will know where she is." I nodded. This was going to be a long flight.

Long flight doesn't even begin to cover the agony that I had to sit through. It was the longest four hours of my life. As soon as the plane hit the ground I was out of my seat. We were the first ones off the plane. It was torture to move through the lobby of the airport at human speed, but we needed to keep up appearances until we were clear of the people. Emmett and Rose met us at the terminal exit. Alice had not actually told anyone the address so we were following her lead. As soon as we cleared the main road we were running. It didn't take long before we stopped in front of a ranch style home.

I took a step toward the door and Carlisle's hand came down on my shoulder. "Son, you need to be prepared for what we might find. She may not even be here, but if she is she may not be exactly happy to see us. She may not be in her right mind. We need to find out what really happened. We have Alice's visions and what the police think, but the Bella we knew wouldn't hurt a fly." I knew everything he said was true, but I couldn't seem to care. I needed to see her and hold her in my arms. Everything else would fall into place. I knew it.

I knocked on the front door. I heard someone moving inside so I managed to keep myself from breaking down the door. The moment the door opened I grabbed the man by the throat. "Where is she?!" I heard my family discussing what to do behind me. I ignored them. "WHERE IS SHE?!" I shook him. Hard. His mouth was moving, but now words were coming out. I assumed he was trying to answer my question so I set him on the ground. I waited for his answer as he coughed and attempted to find his voice.

"Your eyes…they're black. They remind me of hers, except hers were bright red." Esme was the one who asked. "Whose eyes?" The man looked nervous. "Victoria. That's what Matt called her." I hissed. That bitch! I was going to rip her apart and put her back together just so I could rip her apart again. I was getting impatient. Of course Alice saw my plan before I even moved. "Edward, focus. She's not here. There is no other person in this house." Carlisle stepped forward and placed a restraining hand on my shoulder. "Please forgive my son. He is not himself at the moment. My name is Carlisle and this is my wife Esme, my sons Edward, Jasper and Emmett, and my daughters Alice and Rosalie. We believe you may know where a member of our family is. It's imperative that we find her as soon as possible."

The man looked confused. "I have never seen anyone like you before." I sighed in frustration. "She wouldn't have looked like us. She has brown hair and brown eyes and has been missing for about 4 months." The man froze. "You're looking for Bella." It was a statement, not a question. Carlisle was thinking very loudly in my direction. _Be careful Edward. If we spook him he may not tell us what he knows._ I nodded to let him know that I understood. Before I could speak Alice stepped forward. "Will you tell us where she is Paul?" His eyes got very wide. "H-how do you know my name?" Alice was treading on very thin ice here. I didn't even need him to say it out loud; I just needed him to think it. "You look like a Paul. Won't you help me find my sister? I miss her terribly." Alice did the best pout out of all of us. She could get an answer from a mute. Paul took a deep breath and I had my answer.

He gave us the address and a warning to be careful. He told us everything he knew about Matt and Victoria. Little did he know we wanted to catch both of them, but Bella was our first priority. I turned to leave when a thought struck me. "How long have you known where she was?" Paul was suddenly extremely uncomfortable. Carlisle looked at me. "HOW LONG?!" I took two steps toward him. He took a deep breath. "I guess I've known the whole time she's been here, about 3 months, but I only knew for sure for about a day." It was my turn to take a deep breath. "Did you know what was happening to her?" He looked at the ground. "Yes." I let a low hiss escape me and Emmett and Jasper were at my side immediately. Jasper was sending calming waves my way, but they weren't working.

This man knew what was happening to my Bella and yet he did nothing to help her. "Why didn't you help her? WHY?!" This time Paul met my angry eyes. "First of all, I didn't know for sure until yesterday. Secondly, the instant I but the pieces together I tried to get her out of there, but she wouldn't leave." He stopped speaking and my anger left me in a sudden rush. "She wouldn't leave? Did she say why?"

"She said something about Victoria being angry and coming after me. Though she did say that if she got out on her own she would come here." I sighed. It was typical Bella, always worried about someone else when she really needed to worry about herself. It made me miss her even more. "Thank you, for trying to help her. I'm sorry if I offended you, it's just that she is my other half. I'm nothing without her. I need to see her." Paul lost his anger. "I understand. You are a lucky man. She's special, but she will need a lot of help to recover from this. I don't know what went on before she came here, but I saw firsthand what happened when she was here and let's just say it's nothing that you want to know about." He was right I didn't want to know, but I owed it to her to step up and face it. I looked at the images in his head and wanted to throw up.

I couldn't speak so Carlisle came forward and thanked Paul again. "Please take this, as a thank you for all your help." Carlisle handed him a stack of bills. I think it was $5,000 but I wasn't sure. We all turned and left while Paul tried to get over the shock of the amount of money. After we left the house, the rest of the family was unusually quiet. I looked at each of them and I could see the fear and worry in their eyes. They were trying not to think about what we would find at the house and failing. I too was worried about my Bella, but as long as she was alive we could get through anything.

We raced through the shadows of Boston to the address Paul had given us. It was important to move quickly because if Victoria smelled us before we got there, she would act and it wouldn't end well. We found the house easily. We stopped far enough away not be overheard. Everyone started talking at once. I wasn't really listening. I was too busy listen to the greatest sound in the world, her heart beat. It was a little faint, but it was there. Just hearing it made me happier than I had been since I left her.

Rose reached over a punched me in the shoulder. It didn't hurt, but it got my attention. My whole family was looking at me. "Sorry I was distracted." Rose raised an eyebrow at me. "We know, but we need you to focus now so we can get in there and get her home." I nodded. Carlisle repeated what to do when we got inside. "Esme, Rose, and Alice you find Bella and get her out of there." I opened my mouth to protest but Carlisle cut me off. "I know you want to be there Edward, but after what was done to her, she will probably be more comfortable about women. It's just for now." He was right of course. I nodded. "Good. Edward, Emmett and Jasper if Victoria is in the house you take care of her." This time I did protest. "No. Victoria is mine." Carlisle sighed. "I thought you would say that. Fine. Emmett, Jasper and I will secure the rest of the house and help the girls with Bella if need be. Is everyone ok with this?" He looked around and everyone nodded.

"Good. Any last minute questions before we go?" Rose looked at me and then back at Carlisle. "If you find Matt, don't kill him." My jaw dropped. "What?!" Rose looked at me. "I know everyone here wants him dead, but trust me. Don't kill him. When Bella's better let her decide what to do with him. She will need some form of closure and she can't get that if he's dead. We can keep him locked up until then." Rose would know all about closure, since something similar happened to her, but she wasn't kept for months. I couldn't help but be grateful that she would be able to relate to Bella and help her through this. Carlisle looked at me then nodded. "Ok, don't kill Matt, for now. Let's go bring her home."

We all turned and raced for the house. As soon as we burst through the door we froze and all our plans were shot to hell. Bella was suspended from the ceiling fan by her wrists. She was covered in blood and absolutely nothing else. The smell of that much of her blood hit me like a freight train. Carlisle was the only one not affected. He darted forward and cut her down. He laid her on the ground and covered her with a blanket from the couch. I pulled myself together enough to go to her side. I fell to my knees beside her. That's when she started to scream.

APOV

We meet Edward at the airport. I knew he was going to badger me with questions about why we were going to Boston, but I didn't have time to answer them now. I acknowledged his presence with a nod, but I was saved from having to tell him that by the attendant called for the final boarding of our flight. We all made our way to the gate. I noticed Edward hadn't moved yet, but before we had to drag him along he caught up with us.

We all settled into our seats. Edward slid in next to me. Before he could even ask me to explain I turned and looked at him. "I know you want to know what happened, and I will tell you, I promise, but we need to get in the air first." Edward finally nodded.

After the flight was underway I turned to him and told him what I saw. "I saw Bella in a room with a stranger." Edward tensed. "The man was showing her something. At first I couldn't tell what it was, but when I concentrated I saw his driver's license. We have his address." He froze in his seat. "The only problem is we don't know if Bella is at the address I saw or somewhere else, but either way we will find her soon. She'll either be there or this man will know where she is." He nodded. This was going to be a long flight.

I don't think Edward moved the whole time we were in the air. Not that I could blame him. We were all anxious to get Bella home. As soon as the plane landed we were the first ones off. It was agonizing having to move at a human pace through the airport. Rose and Emmett met us at the door and then we were running. We found the house easily enough. Edward was the first to move toward the door. Carlisle stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. "Son, you need to be prepared for what we might find. She may not even be here, but if she is she may not be exactly happy to see us. She may not be in her right mind. We need to find out what really happened. We have Alice's visions and what the police think, but the Bella we knew wouldn't hurt a fly."

Edward nodded and knocked on the door. Once we saw the man I stopped really listening. I was hit with a vision. I came back to consciousness gasping for breath with Jasper's arms around me. He leaned down and whispered in my ear. "What did you see?" I just shook my head. Telling them about it wouldn't help anyone at this point. Everyone but Edward was looking at me. "Edward, focus. She's not here. There is no other person in this house." I knew Edward heard me. Carlisle stepped forward and placed a restraining hand on my shoulder. "Please forgive my son. He is not himself at the moment. My name is Carlisle and this is my wife Esme, my sons Edward, Jasper and Emmett, and my daughters Alice and Rosalie. We believe you may know where a member of our family is. It's imperative that we find her as soon as possible."

"I have never seen anyone like you before." Edward sighed. "She wouldn't have looked like us. She has brown hair and brown eyes and has been missing for about 4 months." The man froze. "You're looking for Bella." It was a statement, not a question. I stepped forward. "Will you tell us where she is Paul?" His eyes got very wide. "H-how do you know my name?" I had to be very careful. "You look like a Paul. Won't you help me find my sister? I miss her terribly." I could get an answer from a mute if I really wanted to. No one seemed to be able to deny me anything. Paul took a deep breath and gave us the answer.

As soon as Paul gave us the address I had another vision of how Edward was going to react. So I knew that everyone would be focused on him. No one would notice if I stepped outside. I turned and ran out the front door and two blocks down. At the exact same moment I saw Edward shouting at Paul, I looked up at the night sky and let out the scream that had been trapped in my throat since my vision of Bella. I knew we would be too late and there was nothing I could do about it. She was already dead.

I was back in the house before anyone noticed my absence. The rest of the family was just leaving. We ran through Boston and found the house. I hardly heard a word Carlisle said. There was a heartbeat inside the house and although I had the vision of Bella hanging from the ceiling covered in blood I couldn't help but hope she was alive. Edward was focused on the same thing I was, but for different reasons. He wasn't the one who thought Bella was dead. I was. Rose punched Edward in the shoulder and the directions were repeated. We all ran through the front door and froze in our tracks.

The smell of blood was like getting punched in the gut. It was the total embodiment of my vision. Bella was hanging from the ceiling fan by her wrists, naked and covered in her own blood. Her heart was still beating but it was faint. Carlisle raced across the room and cut her down and covered her with a blanket. Edward finally pulled himself together enough to kneel by her. The moment his knees hit the ground she started screaming and my heart was ripped out of my chest.

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A/N: I initially thought this chapter would contain Bella's POV too, but I wanted to get this out since I haven't updated in awhile. So the next chapter will have Bella's POV of the hours before the Cullens found her and we will find out why she's screaming. Please, please don't hate me for taking so long to update. Also just a fair warning finals are quickly approaching so if I don't update that's why. I will try really really hard to get another chapter up before finals actually start, but I'm not sure.

Also, I was thinking about posting an alternate chapter for the one coming up. I have a couple different things running through my head at the moment and I'm not sure what is going to win out yet, but if it's something you think I should consider let me know. I'll wait until I get the response from the next chapter to make my final decision.

As always thanks so much for reading and leaving me your thoughts!! Now **PUSH THE BUTTON!!**


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight…**

A/N: Sorry everyone this one is a little shorter than usual, but I wanted to get Bella's POV of the last chapter up. So here it is. Enjoy!

_I need you  
I need you here  
I need you now  
I need security somehow  
I need you  
Like you would not believe  
You're the only thing I want  
Cause you're everything I need_

_Explore the cave that is my chest  
A torch reveals there's nothing left  
Your whispers echo off the walls  
And you can hear my distant calls  
The voice of who I used to be  
Screaming out "someone, someone please  
Please shine a light into the black  
Wade through the depths and bring me back_

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BPOV

After Paul left, Matt stalked over to me with death in his eyes. I had just heard him say he wouldn't kill me, but the human body was a remarkable thing. You'd be amazed what you could live through. For the first time in a long time I was actually scared. Before I meet Edward I thought that worst thing that could happen was death. Then he came into my life and I knew the worst thing that could ever happen to me would be to be without him. Well surprise surprise, it happened and I survived.

After I was kidnapped the worst I came to fear was rape. Death would have been far kinder. But looking into Matt's eyes, this time was different. I had been offered freedom and life and I turned it down and now I feared death. Matt stopped and removed his pants. He fell upon my body like a pit bull. I screamed. I had learned long ago that calling out for Edward was useless and usually just made thing worse. But this time I couldn't help myself. Matt was crazed. He bit my shoulder and my breast. I screamed for Edward. Matt raised his face to look at me and there was blood on his chin.

"Shut up! Your precious Edward can't help you now." I didn't stop until his hands closed around my throat. He was trying to strangle me. I don't know what happened to make him this angry, but he was going to kill me. I knew it. He forced himself inside me and I didn't have enough air to scream. I clawed at his hands and arms as he started to move. The edges of my vision went black and my struggling became weaker. I think he noticed I had stopped moving under him because he let me go.

"Oh no you don't. You don't get to pass out on me, yet." He grabbed my waist and pulled me against his body as he thrust forward. I was coughing and gasping for breath. My throat burned with every breath I took. He started to move faster and harder against me. I couldn't scream because my throat burned, not that is mattered much. Screaming didn't help. Nothing helped. He finished not long after that and collapsed on top of me. He was panting, but didn't move. A few moments later he pushed himself up and looked at me. My shoulder and breast stung where he bit me. I knew I was still bleeding, I could smell it. I looked him in the eyes and the next thing I knew his fist collided with the side of my head and darkness over took me.

I don't know how long I was out for, but when I woke up I was blindfolded. I slowly took an inventory of all my aches and pains. My throat still burned. My shoulder and breast still stung and my wrists were sore. I focused on that. It was a new pain. I tried to move and released my wrists were bound together. "Now don't try and struggle, that rope is unbreakable." I froze. It was Victoria. "Now then, it's about time you woke up, we're running out of time. I didn't want to do this while you were unconscious. It's so much more fun when their awake." She picked me up and suspended me in the air. I don't know how, but I can only assume she attached the rope around my wrists to something.

"Now Bella, I could kill you, and trust me, I really, really want to, but I think I will leave you as a message instead." I was confused. "A message to whom? No one knows where I am." She laughed. "Silly, stupid child. The Cullens of course." Now I was really confused. Edward left me. She knew that. He didn't care about me anymore. "Why? Edward doesn't care about me. Not anymore. What could you possibly gain from leaving me as a message?" She pulled the blindfold off and looked me in the eye. "You really don't know do you?"

"Know what? I know he left me for his distractions. I know I am not good enough for him and I know he finally figured it out. What more is there to know?" Victoria grabbed my chin. "Vampires mate for life. Nothing can change that but the death of one of the mates and the other usually follows shortly after that, but not before taking vengeance for their mate's demise."

"I'm not Edward's mate. I can't be. I'm only human and he – he's so much more." She laughed again. "That doesn't matter, not if he would do what came naturally instead of fighting it. But enough about that. It doesn't matter what you think. We don't have much time, but this shouldn't take long." She released my chin and grabbed my hair. She pulled my head to the side and lowered her mouth to my neck. "Mmmm…mouth watering. This will only hurt a little." I felt her teeth a moment before she broke my skin. I screamed and she was gone.

I was confused again. I looked around. I was alone in a large room suspended from the ceiling fan in full view of the front door. The bite on my neck was burning, but not as badly as when James bit me. It was spreading though. I tried to break the bonds at my wrists but it was useless. Just when I thought they had forgotten about me, Matt walked through the front door.

"Well, what do we have here? It seems Victoria had her fun after all. Now it's my turn." He crossed the room to the stereo and pushed play. Instantly my lullaby filled the room. I don't know what he had planned, but if I was lucky the fire would consume me before then. Come to think of it, the burn at my neck was spreading, but it was moving very slowly, which was strange. When James bit my wrist the fire raced up my arm and tried to move across my body, but Edward stopped it. This time it was like molasses moving through my veins.

Matt walked over and stopped in front of me. He reached behind him and pulled out a long knife. "Victoria told me I had exactly 2 hours to play with you. I can't kill you, but I can bleed you." And with that he cut me. It was a shallow cut across my stomach, but it hurt. He wasted no time in making another cut this time on my hip. Every cut he made hurt a little more than the one before. I cried. I don't remember the last time I cried. I let my tears fall, not for the pain, but for what my life had become. I had everything I ever wanted and it was all taken from me with one decision. I think I hated Edward a little for that. When Matt was finished I was covered from the neck down in blood and the burn had reached my fingers and toes, but not my heart. Not yet. Matt looked at me with can only be described as lust.

"So beautiful." He reached up and pressed his lips to mine, then made one final cut, across my forehead. The blood was pouring down my face, but the cut wasn't that deep. Head wounds bleed a lot, I would know. He took a step back and looked at me. My vision was blurring and I knew it was from blood loss. Matt cleaned the knife and put it away. He walked to the front door, took one last look at me and stepped outside. The darkness was pulling me under again and I didn't fight it. If I was unconscious then I couldn't hurt. The last thing I remember was the sound of my lullaby.

I thought being unconscious would help. I was so very very wrong. When the burning reached the center of my chest it pulled me out of the darkness and threw me into the fire. I screamed and gave myself over to the pain.

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A/N: I don't have much to say about this one…the next chapter will pick up where this one and chapter 16 left off. I hope to have it finished and up on Saturday, but I can't be sure since it is finals week. The song in the beginning is part of "I Need You" by Relient K. I think it sums up perfectly what Bella is feeling without Edward around. I am debating about posting an alternate version of events for these two chapters, but only if enough people want me to so let me know what you think. Reviews are better than 12 inches of snow in one day! PUSH THE BUTTON!!! PLEASE AND THANK YOU!

PS: Anyone who reviews may get a little something extra to get them going until the next chapter is up… ;)


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight…**

A/N: I'm really sorry it's taken me so long to update. I had a severe case of writer's block. I think I rewrote this chapter four times. I'm finally happy with it…I think…lol…enjoy.

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EPOV

My family was talking, that much I knew, but I was too worried about Bella to care. Her body was covered in blood and she was screaming like her life depended on it. I reached out to touch her cheek, but Alice stopped me. "Don't touch her Edward. Not yet." I growled at her. "Why not?" She looked at me and didn't say anything, but she didn't have to. She showed me the vision in her head. I sighed and knew she was right. If I touched Bella now she would hurt herself struggling to get away and I couldn't bear to cause her more pain.

Alice turned to Rose. "Turn that blasted music off." It was only then that I realized there was music in the room. Classical piano music, but more specifically, my music, Bella's music. Understanding dawned on me. I had helped them hurt her. My vision bled to red and I raced out the front door. I don't know where I was headed, but I had to get away. The very thing that was supposed to bring her comfort and security had been used bring pain and bloodshed.

I let my grief overtake me, again. This was all my fault. As if I didn't feel bad enough about leaving her alone, now I had to feel guilty about being part of those bastards causing her pain. I didn't know if I could live with that. Not that it mattered what I could or couldn't live with if she died. If she died everything would cease to matter. The very idea buckled my knees. I feel to the ground and sobbed, or would have been sobbing if I was still human. I think I may have been sick if it were actually possible. I don't know how long I stayed like that, but eventually my phone rang.

I didn't bother looking at it. Only my family had my number now. I ignored it. They kept calling. I finally reached into my pocket and answered it. Alice's annoying pixie voice immediately filled my ear. "GET BACK HERE NOW! I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU THINK YOU ARE BUT IT'S NOT ALL ABOUT YOU! PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER AND GET YOUR SORRY ASS BACK HERE NOW!" She hung up before I even had time to give a response. She was right, once again.

I always considered myself a selfless person. I did what I needed to in order to protect my family, never taking anything for myself. And then I met Bella. I suddenly found myself being selfish. I should have walked away and never looked back once Bella figured out our secret, but I wanted her. I wanted her, so I did the most selfish thing ever, I stayed. The only truly unselfish thing I had done since I meet her was leaving and look how that turned out. Now I was being selfish again, only this time I wasn't happy doing it. I pulled myself to my feet and ran back the way I had come.

I did a quick sweep of the room as soon as I walked in and noticed two things. One, Bella, Carlisle and Alice were missing and two, the rest of the family was staring at me. Esme came forward and wrapped her arms around me. "Everything will be fine son. Alice and Carlisle and just getting her cleaned up and checking her wounds. We rented a private jet that won't ask any questions so we can bring her home." Esme's kindness never failed to amaze me. I couldn't speak so I just nodded. I looked up and Carlisle was standing in the door way.

"She has three bite marks. Two smell of human saliva. One is definitely a vampire bite. She has a few deep cuts that would normally require stitches and numerous shallow cuts. Alice is finishing binding the worst cuts now then we can be on our way home." My heart shattered. She was changing. It was the one thing I always wanted to avoid. But if I was being honest with myself, deep down inside, I was pleased. Not with the way it happened of course, but it was the only way we could be together forever, and we would be together even if it was the last thing I ever did.

Alice came out of the backroom carrying Bella. She was unconscious. I rushed to her side and took her from Alice. There were no words to express my gratitude to Alice. "Thank you Alice, for everything. I will never be able to repay you for everything you've done for Bella and for me." She didn't speak out loud but I heard her loud and clear. _You don't have to thank me for anything. You would have done the same for me. Let's just focus on getting her home and better._All I could do was nod. I looked at Carlisle. "When do we leave?" He glanced at his watch. "Right now actually. Our jet should be waiting at the airport to take us back to Forks."

We ran out into the night toward the airport and never looked back. We made it to the airport and onto the plane without incident. I don't know how much Carlisle was paying the pilot to not ask questions, but I was grateful. We were in the air before Bella started to show signs of regaining consciousness. Not long after she started screaming again and nothing I could do seemed to make it better. I knew she was in pain, but this seemed to be a different kind of scream.

I looked to Jasper who was sitting as far away from Bella as possible. "Why is she screaming like this?" Before Jasper could answer Emmett piped up. "She's in pain. Duh!" I glared at him and Rose smacked him upside the head. I looked back to Jasper. "Fear. She's deathly afraid right now, but I don't know why." That made everyone stop and think for a moment. Rose was the first one to speak. "Do you people really not get it? Think about what she went through and who is currently the closest person to her." I was confused and by the looks on the other's faces I wasn't the only one. Alice understood next. "Oh my God. I never thought of that. Edward put her down and step away." I growled at her.

"Don't you growl at her Edward Cullen. She's right. Put Bella down and come over here." I stared at my mother. It looked like the men were the only one not to get it. I focused on Alice's mind and picked out the idea. _Edward, listen to us. Even before Bella was kidnapped, what happened to her in the mental institution? And then she was kidnapped by a human working for a vampire. Right now you represent everything negative in her life. You are a man and a vampire. Come over here and let us take care of her._ My jaw dropped. They were right. How could I not take into account the fact that she might be scared of me? I gently laid her on the seat next to me and moved away. As soon as I wasn't touching her the screams died down to whimpers and moans.

I ran a hand through my hair. This was going to be frustrating. I couldn't touch her without causing her pain, but if I wasn't touching her I wasn't convinced this was actually happening. I sighed. I would let my mother and sisters take care of my love. I would have the rest of my life to hold her in my arms. I walked to the other side of the plane and sat down. I made sure I was facing her. I watched as my mother and sisters tended her, with as little actual contact as possible. It was like watching an intricate dance. They had to give her enough space to feel safe and still be able to stop her from hurting herself and try to keep her comfortable.

Time was irrelevant. In my mind I knew it was a 4 hour flight from Boston to Seattle, but it seemed to take much longer. I didn't move until the plane was on the ground. I moved to Bella's side. The last hour had been hard. She was screaming again and this time it was from the pain. Every scream tore at my heart. I moved to pick her up, but Carlisle stopped me. "Son, we need to be careful here. People know us and they know her. Her screams are going to attract unwanted attention." I nodded. "I know that, but I don't see how we can avoid it."

My entire family was staring at me like I missed a very obvious point. Alice was the one to step forward. "Edward, she can't make any noise if she's not awake." I hissed and dropped into a crouch. She wanted to hurt Bella. My mind registered Emmett and Jasper stepping up in front of Alice. Jasper was sending calming waves my way. I could still hear Alice talking from behind the wall of my brothers.

"Edward. EDWARD! Calm down! It's only enough to keep her quite until we reach the house. She's already changing so she probably won't even feel it." I knew she was right, but it went against everything I believed in to stand by and let any harm come to her. I pulled myself upright and nodded. "Sorry Alice." She nodded and crossed the plane to Bella. She glanced back at me and when I nodded her fist shot out and hit Bella in the side of the head. I cringed at the sound of the impact, but Alice was right, in comparison to the burning it was probably nothing.

We moved quickly from there. We got Bella into the house and into my bed before she started making noise again. Carlisle placed a hand on my shoulder. "All that's left to do is wait it out." I nodded. "Could you leave us alone for awhile?" Now it was Carlisle's turn to nod. "We'll be right down stairs if you need anything." I thanked him and they all left. I knelt next to the bed and took Bella's hand. I don't know if she was able to hear me, but I needed to tell her everything.

"I don't know if you can hear me my love, but I'm so very sorry for everything. I only left because I thought it would be best for you. I'm not good for you. I wanted you to have a normal life away from all the violence and constant danger. I never thought anything like this would happen. If I had known what was going on I would have been here sooner. I know you may not be able to forgive me, but I will do whatever it takes to earn your trust again. I love you so much and I don't care how long it takes to make you see that. We have forever after all. I'm sorry for that too. I 'm sorry I didn't find you in time to save you."

I spent the next three days glued to the floor next to the bed. My family came and went and everyone tried to persuade me to go hunting, but I couldn't leave her side. The last time I left her she disappeared. On the third day Carlisle came in to check on Bella's progress. He checked her pulse and frowned. "What's wrong?" His expression was not comforting. "She should be nearing the end of the change, but her vitals and her physical appearance indicate she is only about half way through." He didn't give me a chance to ask what that meant. "Alice, come in here please."

Alice ghosted in and appeared by his side. "Can you see when she will wake up?" I was looking at Alice as she eyes glazed over and she went into her trance. I was so used to seeing the visions with her that when I saw nothing I thought she was blocking me. Alice shook her head. "No." Carlisle looked surprised. "What do you mean no?" She looked confused. "I mean that I can't see when she will wake up because I can't see her future at all. It's all black." I looked at Carlisle. "What does this mean?" He frowned. "I'm not sure, but for now I guess the best we can do is wait and see what happens. The speed of the change is directly related to the amount of venom and the point of entry. It's possible that Victoria only bit her for a moment and therefore only a small amount of venom entered her system."

So we waited. It was another three days before there was any sign that her transformation was coming to an end. I listened to her heart rate take flight. "Carlisle, something's happening." He was in the room in a moment. He listened for a second and finally smiled. "She's nearing the end, finally. It won't be long now." The rest of the family gathered in the room and we waited. It was another 15 minutes before her heart stopped. I squeezed her hand. "Bella?" I was staring at her face willing her to open those beautiful brown eyes. Alice stepped forward. "Bella, I know it's scary, but you're safe here I promise." I don't know if it was Alice's voice in particular, or the fact that it was a woman's voice, but my Bella opened her eyes and looked at me. It was the most beautiful site in the universe.

BPOV

I was being burned alive. If I could only open my eyes I would see my charred, ruined body. I heard people talking, but I didn't know what they were saying. I whimpered and moaned and when that didn't help I screamed. I was vaguely aware that I was being moved and then a very slight cooling sensation all over my body. I was aware that I was screaming and then nothing but darkness.

I knew I was moving, but I didn't know where I was. I was still burning, but beyond that I felt hard arms holding me and I panicked. I started screaming for an entirely different reason. She was here. She found me again. I wouldn't go back with her. Maybe someone would hear my screams and help me. She let me go and I stopped screaming. With nothing to distract me, I was back to being consumed by the fire. Occasionally I would be touched, but the touches confused me. They weren't hurting touches. Someone was trying to make me feel better. I think. Every so often my head would cool down by a fraction of a degree.

When was my suffering going to end? Screaming didn't help. Thrashing and flailing didn't help. Nothing helped. I was burning and no one cared. In one of the lulls of the fire I heard voices again. I focused on what they were saying, but I didn't hear all of it. "…and they know her. Her screams are going to attract unwanted attention…" I clung to the fact that we were going somewhere people knew me, which narrowed it down to Forks, Jacksonville, or Phoenix. I wasn't paying attention the voices anymore, but I felt the sharp pain in my head again and the darkness overtook me…again.

The first thing I noticed was that I was still burning. Then I noticed that I was on something soft. I didn't get to appreciate it for long before I was too busy burning again. I felt someone take my hand and I tensed for a moment. After a minute, I stopped caring who it was. I screamed. And then I heard him. My Edward was talking to me. Maybe it was all in my head, but it was my lifeline. I focused on every word and worked very hard to hear everything.

"I don't know if you can hear me my love, but I'm so very sorry for everything. I only left because I thought it would be best for you. I'm not good for you. I wanted you to have a normal life away from all the violence and constant danger. I never thought anything like this would happen. If I had known what was going on I would have been here sooner. I know you may not be able to forgive me, but I will do whatever it takes to earn your trust again…"

My mind may have wanted to hear the end, but my body had other ideas. The fire flared up and I lost the voice of my angel. I stopped trying to be aware then. My mind shut down and I gave myself over to the pain.

I didn't think it could get any worse, but it did. My heart was racing so fast I thought it was going to burst from my chest and the fire burned even hotter than before, but it was retreating from my limbs. It seemed to concentrate on my chest so that my heart burned hotter than ever before. My heart gave one last thump and then stopped. The fire of gone and I was alive, sort of. I didn't open my eyes right away. The scents in the room were overwhelming enough. Someone was holding my hand. It wasn't the stone cold hand I wanted. I tensed to pull away when I heard his voice again.

"Bella?" I was going crazy. I had to be. He wasn't here. He didn't care about me. Unless everything I heard was true? I felt like I should be confused but my new mind had power to spare. The whole time I was trying to figure out if I was crazy or not, my mind was cataloguing the scents and scanning for danger at the same time. "Bella, I know it's scary, but you're safe here I promise." That was Alice. Does this mean they are really here? I guess there was only one way to find out. I opened my eyes and looked at who was holding my hand. It was the most beautiful site I had ever seen.

APOV

Carlisle was talking. I don't know what he was saying. I was watching Edward's reaction to Bella's condition. He reached out to touch her and I stopped him. "Don't touch her Edward. Not yet." He growled at me. "Why not?" I didn't say anything. I just showed him the vision. Bella would hurt herself trying to get away from any male touch at the moment. Without having to worry about Edward touching Bella, I could take in my surroundings. It was an average living room, but the one thing that was different was the music. Edward hadn't noticed the it yet, which was strange since it was his composition.

I turned to Rose. "Turn that blasted music off." She did as I asked. I watched understanding bloom on Edward's face. It was followed quickly by horror and anger. He didn't say a word. He just ran out the front door. Carlisle looked at me and I shook my head. I looked into his future and saw that he would return before we needed to leave, with a little help from me of course. Carlisle placed a hand on my shoulder.

"Give him a minute Alice. He's just had a big shock." I nodded and Carlisle continued. "We need to get her cleaned up before he gets back." I nodded. "I'll carry her. She doesn't need to be touched by a man right now." I picked Bella up and followed Carlisle to the bathroom. He pulled off the blanket and turned on the water. I placed her in the tub and stepped back. The bathroom was too small for more than one person to be standing around. "I'll go see about Edward. She'll pass out in about 30 seconds so you won't have any problems. I'll be back in a minute." Carlisle looked over his shoulder and nodded.

I walked back out into the living room where the rest of the family was discussing our next step. Emmett wanted to see if Victoria and Matt were still in the area. Rose was on board with that idea too. Esme wanted to get Bella home as fast as possible. Jasper was oddly quiet. He looked at me as I entered the room and I gave him a small smile. He came to my side and wrapped his arms around me. "She'll be alright darlin'. She's strong." I nodded and turned to the rest of the family. "She's in pretty bad shape. We need to get her home. Esme, can you call around and find us a private jet that won't ask too many questions?" She nodded. Emmett looked disappointed for a moment, but he got over it quickly.

I pulled out my cell phone and dialed Edward's number. He didn't answer so I kept calling. He finally picked up his damn phone and I didn't even give him a chance to say anything. "GET BACK HERE NOW! I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU THINK YOU ARE, BUT IT'S NOT ALL ABOUT YOU! PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER AND GET YOUR SORRY ASS BACK HERE NOW!" I snapped the phone shut without waiting for a response. I looked at my family. Rose had a small smile on her lips. "You were too nice." Rose would think that.

I went back into the bathroom to check on Bella. Carlisle was finished cleaning her wounds. He looked at me as I walked in. "She has three bite marks and numerous cuts. I'll go check on Edward if you can finish biding the deepest cuts." I nodded and he left the room. I knelt by Bella's side. I picked up the towel Carlisle had been using and ripped off another piece. I tied the piece around a cut on her arm and repeated the process. When I was finished with the worst of the cuts, I just stared at her for a moment. "I don't know if you can hear me, but please don't die. You're my best friend and I need you." I kissed her forehead, wrapped her in a bathrobe that I found in the closet, and carried her back into the living room.

Carlisle had finished filling everyone in and Edward was back. He rushed to my side and took Bella into his arms. "Thank you Alice, for everything. I will never be able to repay you for everything you've done for Bella and for me." I didn't speak, but I knew he heard me. _You don't have to thank me for anything. You would have done the same for me. Let's just focus on getting her home and better._He nodded and looked to Carlisle. "When do we leave?" He glanced at his watch. "Right now actually. Our jet should be waiting at the airport to take us back to Forks."

We raced into the night, every step bringing us closer to home. We managed to get on the plane and in the air without incident. It was only then that Bella started moaning and then screaming. Nothing Edward could do was calming her. He looked to Jasper for answers. "Why is she screaming like this?" Before Jasper could answer Emmett piped up. "She's in pain. Duh!" Edward glared at him and Rose smacked him upside the head. Jasper answered. "Fear. She's deathly afraid right now, but I don't know why." That made everyone stop and think for a moment.

Rose was the first one to speak. "Do you people really not get it? Think about what she went through and who is currently the closest person to her." Everyone was confused for a moment more and then the light bulb went on. "Oh my God. I never thought of that. Edward put her down and step away." He growled at me…again.

"Don't you growl at her Edward Cullen. She's right. Put Bella down and come over here." Esme scolded Edward, but I knew he didn't really mean anything by it. I started thinking in his direction, and very loudly I might add. _Edward, listen to us. Even before Bella was kidnapped, what happened to her in the mental institution? And then she was kidnapped by a human working for a vampire. Right now you represent everything negative in her life. You are a man and a vampire. Come over here and let us take care of her._ His jaw dropped. He laid her on the seat next and moved away. As soon as he wasn't touching her the screams died down to whimpers and moans.

As soon as Edward was far enough away, Esme, Rose and I converged on Bella. We tried to touch her as little as possible and every touch was meant to be a comfort. I only hope that's what it came across as.

It was a 4 hour flight to Seattle, and Edward was a statue the whole time. The last hour was the worst. Bella started screaming again. Every scream broke my heart a little more. As soon as the plane touched down he was back at Bella's side. Carlisle stopped Edward from picking Bella up.

"Son, we need to be careful here. People know us and they know her. Her screams are going to attract unwanted attention." Edward nodded. "I know that, but I don't see how we can avoid it."

Edward was missing the very obvious point. I was the one to step forward. "Edward, she can't make any noise if she's not awake." He hissed and dropped into a crouch. Emmett and Jasper stepped in front of me. I could tell Jasper was sending calming waves Edward's way. All the while I continued to talk to Edward, even through the wall of my brothers.

"Edward. EDWARD! Calm down! It's only enough to keep her quite until we reach the house. She's already changing so she probably won't even feel it." He seemed to process what I was saying and pulled himself upright and nodded. "Sorry Alice." I nodded and crossed the plane to Bella. I glanced back at Edward and when he nodded my fist shot out and hit Bella in the side of the head. We both cringed at the sound of the impact, but it had to be done.

We moved quickly from there. We got Bella into the house and into Edward's bed before she started making noise again. Carlisle placed a hand on Edward's shoulder. "All that's left to do is wait it out." He nodded. "Could you leave us alone for awhile?" Now it was Carlisle's turn to nod. "We'll be right down stairs if you need anything." We all left him alone.

Edward spent the next three days glued to the floor next to the bed. We came and went and everyone tried to persuade him to go hunting, but he wouldn't leave her side. On the third day Carlisle called for me. "Alice, come in here please."

"Can you see when she will wake up?" I looked into Bella's future, only her future was all dark. I shook my head. "No." Carlisle looked surprised. "What do you mean no?" I was confused. "I mean that I can't see when she will wake up because I can't see her future at all. It's all black." Edward looked at Carlisle. "What does this mean?" Carlisle frowned. "I'm not sure, but for now I guess the best we can do is wait and see what happens. The speed of the change is directly related to the amount of venom and the point of entry. It's possible that Victoria only bit her for a moment and therefore only a small amount of venom entered her system."

So we waited. I heard Edward call for Carlisle on the sixth day. I knew why. Everyone in the house could hear her heart rate. We heard Carlisle reassure Edward that her change was indeed coming to an end. "She's nearing the end, finally. It won't be long now." Everyone filed into the room and we waited. It was another 15 minutes before her heart stopped. Edward was the first to speak. "Bella?" When she didn't respond I stepped forward. "Bella, I know it's scary, but you're safe here I promise." Bella opened her eyes and looked at Edward and we all breathed a huge sigh of relief.

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A/N: Now for a slightly longer AN…

To everyone who celebrates Christmas…I hope you all had a Merry Christmas…to everyone else I hope you have a very Happy Holiday.

Happy New Year to everyone! I hope this year brings you nothing but happiness.

Now hopefully this chapter makes up for my long absence. It won't happen again…I hope…but I won't put up a chapter that I'm not happy with. As a reader, I would prefer a writer to take more time and put out something good rather than a whole lot of crap, so that's the philosophy I'm going by. Let me know what you think! PUSH THE BUTTON!!!


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: I own nothing! Haha**

A/N: This one's kind of short sorry! Enjoy!

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BPOV

I opened my eyes and the first thing I saw was Edward's face. "Edward?" He smiled and my heart melted. "Yes my love." I launched myself into his arms, knocking him to the ground in the process. I buried my face in his chest and let him hold me. My world was right again. Edward stroked my hair and kissed my head. I pulled away from him and sat up. My face must have shown my confusion because his smile slipped. "I don't understand. What happened? I remember the party and then everything gets fuzzy. How long ago was that?" My mind was going a mile a minute. Even as I spoke to Edward I was hyper aware of the rest of the room. I knew the rest of the Cullens were between me and the door. Edward cringed and his smile fell completely away.

"You really don't remember anything?" I frowned. "I just said that." I was suddenly very angry. It was like I was looking for a fight and Edward had just given me the reason. I saw Emmett and Jasper step forward. I spun into a defensive crouch without giving Edward my back. I made sure to keep all three of them in my line of sight. Edward took a step forward and I hissed at him. He stopped moving. "Bella. It's ok love. No one here is going to hurt you. We all just want to help you." Emmett and Jasper stepped back and I immediately calmed. I straighten out of my crouch almost before I had the thought to stand up straight, which was a sufficient distraction from my anger.

Carlisle stepped forward. "Bella are you alright?" I thought about his question for a moment. Was I ok? I felt good, better than I could ever remember, but my emotions were all over the place. I was feeling everything at once. I finally nodded. "I think so. I'm a little overwhelmed. I'm feeling everything at once and I'm not sure which once I should follow." He smiled at me. That is completely normal for a newborn. However I can't figure out how you are focused enough to have this conversation. Aren't you thirsty?" As soon as he mentioned the thirst my throat was burning. I glared at him. "Well now that you brought it up I am." He looked surprised. "You really weren't thirsty before now?" I was suddenly angry again. "Why does everyone keep asking me that?! I wouldn't say it if it wasn't true." Edward stepped in front of me and distracted me from Carlisle. "Come on love, let's hunt."

Alice stepped forward before I could take a step toward him. "Hold on. She can't go out in that robe." Alice looked at me. "Bella, will you let me dress you?" I looked at Alice like she was crazy. Not because she wanted to dress me, that was to be expected, but because she asked. Alice didn't ask anything. She told me what she wanted and then she usually got exactly that. I cocked my head to the side. "Why are you asking me Alice? Normally you would just drag me from the room and force me into something appropriate." She frowned. "I resent that. You act like it's some form of torture. Besides you're stronger than me now. I can't drag you anywhere." I smiled at that, but let her lead me to her closet anyway.

She gave me designer jeans, which I was grateful for - the jean part anyway, and a deep blue knit sweater. She also handed me a pair of black panties and a matching bra. Everything was surprisingly normal for Alice. She helped me dress, stating that I didn't know my own strength yet and would ruin the clothes before they could be useful. Everything fit me perfectly, of course. She didn't bother with shoes. "Would you let me do your hair?" I was too surprised to do anything but nod. I followed her into the bathroom. She brushed my hair and pulled it back into a tasteful ponytail and left it at that. She didn't even attempt to put make-up on me.

"What's up Alice? These clothes, the hair and no make-up just are not your normal style." She gave me a look. "Like I said you're stronger than me now. I don't want to fight over the clothes or the hair and you are too beautiful to need make-up now." I didn't believe her for a minute. It was almost like she was trying to make up for something. I had a feeling I was forgetting something big. I shrugged it off and let her have her fun.

My eyes found Edward the instant I walked in the room and his eyes locked with mine. He reached out to take my hand. I hesitated for no more than half a second but he noticed. "Bella?" I just shook my head and took his hand, but the feeling that I was forgetting something was still there. He pulled me into his chest and leaned down to whisper in my ear. "You're absolutely stunning." I waited for the blush, but it didn't come. I smiled into his chest. He pulled me toward the window and I stopped. "We're going out the window?" He smiled at me. "Trust me love. It's easy."

I watched him step out the window and frowned. It looked easy enough. I took a deep, unnecessary breath and stepped out after him. It was like the ground floated up to meet me. I hit the ground and absorbed the impact on the balls of feet. It was so easy. I giggled. Edward was staring at me in fascination. "What?" I asked. He was making me self-conscious. He smiled my favorite crooked smile. "Nothing love. Let's go." He grabbed my hand and took off running. When we reached the river, we stopped. I raised an eyebrow in question. "Allow me to demonstrate." He jumped over the river like it was nothing more than a trickle. "Now you try." I took a few steps back to get a running start and leapt. I landed next to him and another giggle escaped me. He was watching me again. "What now?" He just shook his head and took off into the trees.

I sighed and followed him. It wasn't long before he stopped. He turned to me. "Now what do you smell?" I took a deep breath. "I smell…something." I didn't have a word to describe it. "That's good. Now just let your instincts guide you. Your body knows what to do." I did as he instructed and soon I was running. He gave me enough room that I didn't feel the need to turn and protect my kill. I tracked the scent to a clearing and without pausing to think about it I sprang. I took down the biggest buck without difficulty. I let my teeth sink into his neck and first rush of blood made me groan. It was perfect, exactly what I needed.

When the buck was drained I pulled away and looked for Edward. He was leaning against a tree across the clearing. He had that look on his face again. "What?!" You have been looking at me like that since we left. It's pissing me off!" He looked sheepish. "I'm sorry love. It's just I'm not used to this new you yet. I keep expecting you to trip on your own feet and I never thought I would sit back and watch you hunt. Do you remember wanting to see me hunt?" I nodded. I did remember that. He was so angry with the suggestion. Then it hit me that I should be insulted but his comment about my feet. "Hey! I didn't trip over my own feet. Something usually got in the way."

"Very true my love. I'm sorry. Forgive me?" He looked so cute when he was pouting. I laughed. I couldn't help it. After a moment he chuckled and we both ended up on the ground. When we stopped laughing I took another breath and a new scent hit me. I felt Edward go very tense next to me and he reached over a latched onto my arm. "What is that?" Edward looked confused. "Do you want to hunt it?" I thought about it for a minute. It smelled good, but it was the kind of smell that meant someone other than your mom was cooking dinner. It smelled good, but not the best. I answered honestly. "Not really. It smells good, but the kind of good that means there is something better out there."

Edward was studying my face. "Really? I think we should get home and talk to Carlisle." Now I was confused and a little worried. "Why Edward what's wrong?" He stood up and pulled me to my feet, never losing contact with me. "That is the smell of human blood Bella. There is nothing better out there for a vampire. You are acting nothing like a newborn. We need to talk to Carlisle." I was instantly relieved. I didn't like the smell of human blood! Maybe this meant we didn't have to live in seclusion for years.

We raced home hand in hand. When we entered the living room the whole family was waiting for us. Before Edward even had a chance to talk Alice started. "We already know what you are going to say about the human blood, but we have more pressing issues to deal with, like Bella's memory." Edward growled. "Why do we need to worry about that? Anything she wants to remember she can ask me about." Alice just shook her head. "It doesn't work like that Edward. I've seen it. This needs to be done now." After a moment Edward sighed in defeat. He turned to me. "I'm so sorry love, for everything. Just promise me one thing. No matter what you remember, know that I've always loved you and I always will and together we can overcome any obstacle." He stroked my cheek and crossed the room.

Alice came over to me. "This is so hard to do to you. I wish you didn't have to face the last four month. Remember we love you and will always be here for you." Before I even had the chance to question the four month comment she pushed the play button for the stereo and a song filled the room. It was my lullaby. Something was stirring in my memory, something I wasn't sure I wanted to remember. "Alice, stop this." She didn't stop it. I could feel something bad clawing its way to the surface. I was suddenly scared. "Alice please! Don't do this." She ignored my pleas. I lunged for her, but she stepped to the side at just the right moment. I landed on my hands and knees as everything from the past four months poured into my head. I couldn't speak. I just knelt on all fours and focused on my breathing.

I saw everything and wished I hadn't. When the images finally stopped I stayed still. I felt someone come and stand next to me. My mind registered that is was Esme, but before she could touch me I scrambled away. I back into the corner and looked around the room and all I could see was the black of the basement. I closed my eyes and screamed.

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A/N: Sorry this is a short chapter, but I've been on break so I haven't had much computer time, other than the early morning hours…when everyone else is asleep. Sooo…what do you all think about Bella's memory?? And I promise Alice had a reason for doing what she did. Now all you have to do is PUSH THE GREEN BUTTON AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THOUGHT!!

P.S. I know Renee is not a good cook, but my mom is an excellent cook. So there you go.


	20. Chapter 20

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight…sigh**

A/N: So I'm really behind on responding to reviews...I want you all to know that reviews mean the world to me ad I read them all...so plasedon't be angry is you don't get a response. If you need to ask a question just PM. Now enjoy the next chapter!

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EPOV

Bella was a thing of beauty. Everything about her was absolutely perfect and now she was practically indestructible. When she woke up and launched herself into my arms I was speechless. Then when I found out that she remembered nothing past her birthday party I was worried, but relieved at the same time. I listened to the thoughts of my family as they worried for Bella as well. She was nothing like a typical newborn. She was calm and composed. A little easy to anger, but nothing like what we expected. I wanted to take her hunting to give Carlisle some time to discuss things with the family, of course Alice had other ideas.

"Hold on. She can't go out in that robe." I sighed. She was right. Bella needed clothes. Alice pulled her from the room and immediately my family was mentally screaming at me.

_You need to take it slow Edward. I can't get a read on her emotions, which in and of itself is enough to unsettle me, but she's a newborn, no matter how grown up she acts._

_Even if she doesn't remember what happened to her, it's still there. Something is going to remind her and it will most likely be something you do so tread lightly with her. Trust me. I would know._

_Son, I'm worried about her lack of memories. I believe her mind is trying to protect itself, but I'm more worried about her reaction when she does remember. I think it would be for the best if you weren't alone with he when that happens. Please come back here right after she feeds so we can figure all this out._

_If you hurt her again I will kick your sorry ass from here to China. Got it bro?_

Esme was the only one not trying to get my attention. She was focused on something else entirely. _I hope she doesn't leave._ I was suddenly cold. I had never considered that. Bella and I were meant to be together. I never gave the idea that she would leave me any thought. Before I had time to sink into the deep seated panic that was taking hold Bella came back. I held my hand out to her. She smiled, but hesitated for a fraction of a second. She shrugged it off as nothing, but I couldn't help think it had something to do with her memories.

The hunt was amazing. I never thought I would get to see my Bella in that setting. She was so graceful I couldn't help but stare. I didn't think she could get any more amazing and then I heard her laugh. It was infectious. We ended up on the ground. We lay side by side and just laughed. That is until I caught the scent of human blood. I latched onto Bella's arm, but it was unnecessary. She said the blood didn't appeal to her. I was once again shocked. We made it back to the house as fast as possible after that.

We walked into the house and were immediately ambushed by Alice. "We already know what you are going to say about the human blood, but we have more pressing issues to deal with, like Bella's memory." I growled. "Why do we need to worry about that? Anything she wants to remember she can ask me about." Alice just shook her head. "It doesn't work like that Edward. I've seen it. This needs to be done now." The vision Alice showed me stopped me from protesting more. It was a vision of Bella on her knees in a clearing. She was terrified and she wasn't alone. Victoria and Matt were there. I didn't know what that had to do with Bella's memory until Alice went farther back. Bella was forced to her knees by the very action of her memories returning and she was helpless to defend herself.

As much as it killed me to put her through this I knew that if she ended up in the clearing she wouldn't come back. I sighed in defeat. I turned to Bella. "I'm so sorry love, for everything. Just promise me one thing. No matter what you remember, know that I've always loved you and I always will and together we can overcome any obstacle." I stroked my cheek, crossed the room, and said a prayer that she would be able to forgive me.

I watched, helpless, as Alice played her lullaby and Bella begged her to stop. I watched as my love fell to her knees and was assaulted all over again by her memories. I watched her stay frozen until the memories stopped, and the whole time my heart was being ripped from my chest. After what seemed like an eternity I could tell the onslaught was finished. I longed to go to her, hold her in my arms and tell her everything would be ok, but I didn't and I couldn't. Esme was the first to approach her, but as soon as she got within reach, Bella scrambled away and backed herself into the far corner.

I watched completely helpless as she looked around the room and saw something that wasn't there. When she screamed I sank to the floor and died inside.

BPOV

My new vampire mind was much quicker than I was used to. It only took me a fraction of a second to register that I wasn't back in that basement. I was safe, theoretically. I knew no one here would hurt me physically, but emotionally, well let's just say the people in this room could cripple me forever. I looked around the room again and saw everyone watching me with concern. Esme was the closest to me with Carlisle behind her. Alice was clinging to Jasper like she was drowning. Rosalie and Emmett were holding hands and watching me. Edward was the only one not looking at me. He was on the ground trying to hold himself together. Trust me I know what it looks like.

I managed to pull myself together enough to get up off the floor. No one spoke, they all just watched me. I didn't say anything as I crossed the room and went upstairs. I walked into Edward's bedroom and locked the door behind me. I sat in the middle of the bed and pulled my knees to my chest and just sat. I tried not to think about what happened, but I couldn't help it. I listened to them discuss what to do from downstairs. I listened as they decided that the presence of the men would not be helpful. I heard them leave and I heard the women come up the stairs. There was a light knock on the door.

"Bella can we come it?" It was Alice, the one person I thought was my best friend. "Go away." I heard her sigh. "Bella please. We just want to help. Open the door sweetheart." Esme was the mother I never had. It wasn't until that moment that I realized how much I missed her. If I was being honest I missed all of them, but I wasn't going to let them know that. "Please just leave me alone. I don't want your help." And I didn't. I would pack a bag and get out of here before the boys returned. I pulled myself off the bed and turned toward Edward's closet. I heard more whispers beyond the door followed by a loud crack. I didn't have to turn around to know they had entered the room.

I felt them behind me and then a tiny hand landed on my shoulder. "Bella please don't leave. We just found you. We can't lose you again." Alice sounded so sincere I almost gave in, but my anger reminded me why I shouldn't. "You can't lose me? Well what about me Alice. I won't survive being hurt again. I can't put myself in that situation. Not again. Not after everything that's happened. You say you don't want me to leave, but why does that matter. I didn't want you all to leave, but you still did. I can't go through all this again Alice. I won't."

Alice's hand fell away like my shoulder was suddenly on fire. I turned around and finally looked at the three of them. Alice and Esme looked like they would start sobbing at any minute. Rosalie looked thoughtful. She walked past Alice and Esme and stopped right in front of me. "You must think I hate you after the way I treated you and I am so very sorry for that, but I've seen the way Edward is with you and he is a better person for it –"

I stopped her there. "That's where you're wrong. He doesn't care about me anymore. He left me all alone here to rot so he could run off with his distractions." I was angry. "Bella I don't know what happened between you too but I do know that he has been miserable these past months without you. But enough about him I just wanted to tell you that if you need someone to talk about…what happened. I'm here."

My confusion must have shown on my face because she smiled. "Edward never told you my story did he?" I shook my head. "He's more noble than I give him credit for. Bella I know what you're going through, better than you think. Before I was changed, I was engaged. I was happy. I had everything I could ever want. I thought I would get my fairy tale ending. I was wrong. I was walking home from a friend's house, it was late. My fiancé and some of his friends, who were in town for the wedding, found me walking alone and gang raped me. They left me for dead in the middle of the street. Carlisle found me and saved me. This is not the life I would have chosen for myself. I wanted the world on a silver platter. I wanted the husband and the pretty babies and the jealous girlfriends. I was a fool."

I was stunned. Rosalie had opened up to me without a second thought. "Thank you Rosalie. I appreciate the fact that you could share your story with me, but our situations are a little different. The actual rape wasn't even the worst part for me. It was knowing that somewhere you were all out living your lives and no one cared. After all the kind words and promises you all just left me here! I can't do this right now. I won't leave, yet. I need to make sure I can be around people before I go, but this changes nothing between us." They all nodded and reluctantly left the room.

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A/N: Sorry it's another short one…the next chapter will involve Bella confronting Edward. Should be pretty interesting. But in the mean time let me know what you think of this one. I was kind of sleep deprived when I wrote it…PUSH THE BUTTON!!!


	21. NOT A CHAPTER! Please read anyway!

Hey everyone, I just wanted to drop you all a quick note. Trust me, I know you all probably hate these things, I know I did, before I started writing. Now I know they are the fastest way to get a message to all of you. I know I have been very lax in updating this story and it's not over I promise, but life keeps getting in the way. I am working really hard to find time between school and work and other commitments to get the next chapter finished. I am super stressed and my schedule is crazy and I am having roommate issues on top of it all so stick with me. It will be well worth it I promise. I will update as soon as humanly possible. Just knowing you are all out there waiting is a huge boost to my normally sucky days. I know some of you won't want to wait, but for those of you that do I thank you in advance. Now I must get back to my homework before it buries me alive! Thanks again for all your support!

Bridge


	22. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

A/N: Sorry for the delay…real life got in my way…Just a few things before the chapter…First thing let me apologize to anyone who was offended by the fact that this story involved rape. It was pointed out to me that I should put a warning in my summary, which I have done. So I'm sorry if it was unexpected and offensive in anyway. It was not my intention. This is my first dip into fanfiction and I am still learning the ropes. Second, to everyone who took the time to review the last chapter - a great be round of applause to you! I got some really thoughtful reviews and some good suggestions/critiques. It made my week to read them all, so a great big thank you to all of you. Third, one of my reviews addressed the issue of repetition between POVs. I too have noticed that I tend to say the same thing in each POV so from now on I am going to try to stick strictly to Edward's and Bella's POV. Hopefully that will help fix the problem. Fourth and finally, to everyone who has added the story to your favorites or alerts a great big thanks to you as well. I would love to hear how you think I am doing with this story so feel free to drop me a review. They really do mean the world to me. Now…on to the chapter!

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BPOV

I don't know how long I sat there. It was long after the sun set that I even thought about moving. I didn't want to be around anyone at the moment, but I knew I was too much of a risk to humans to be out on my own. It was a dilemma. After Alice, Esme and Rose left me alone, I did some thinking. I remember everything that happened before the change. I shook just thinking about it.

I thought about Edward and what he told me. _I'm so sorry love, for everything. Just promise me one thing. No matter what you remember, know that I've always loved you and I always will and together we can overcome any obstacle._ I know he meant it at the time, but it was hard to believe that he always loved me. I shook my head to try and clear my thoughts. It was a surprisingly human gesture that still didn't help. I listened to Alice and Esme downstairs in the kitchen. I heard Rosalie working on a car in the garage.

Time had no meaning for me, but I heard them before I even heard the front door open, the boys were back. I knew I didn't really want to see anyone, but especially not any of the men. I figured I needed to be prepared if Edward was going to come up so I listened to the conversation. Surprisingly it was only Carlisle talking to Esme. "Where is she?"

"She's upstairs in Edward's room. Carlisle, she wants to leave. She says she can't stay here for long." Carlisle took a deep breath. "She's too new to be out around humans, but we can't force her to stay here. I'll go speak with her." Esme sighed. "Be careful dear. She's very fragile right now." I heard Carlisle kiss her and walk up the stairs at an almost human pace. He was probably giving me time to compose myself. I called out before he could knock on the door. "Just come in Carlisle."

He stepped into the room and closed the door behind him. "How are you feeling?" The ridiculousness of the question made me laugh. "Well, let's review shall we? I was abandoned by the people I thought of as family. I was dumped by my real father, locked away, kidnapped, changed into a vampire against my will, and oh yes in the middle of all that. I was raped…repeatedly. So how do you think I'm feeling?" Carlisle visibly cringed. I felt bad for a moment and opened my mouth to apologize, but stopped myself. I didn't owe anyone anything.

"Bella I can never express how sorry we are that we left and about everything that happened to you and we are all here for you if you need it, but Esme tells me you want to leave. I think it would be best for the time being if you stayed here. You are too young to be around people just yet." I stopped him before he could go any further. "I know that Carlisle. I was prepared for this, remember? I wanted this life once. I just don't think I can stand being around all of you right now." He looked thoughtful for a moment. "I'll be right back." His speed, which once I couldn't even see, was now easy to follow, but the joy I should have felt was missing. I just felt empty.

He returned with a notebook. "I know it's not much, but sometimes it helps to write things down. Not necessarily memories, but your feelings and your fears. Sometimes getting everything down in one place helps you process things better. Hopefully this will at least help you manage your emotions so a little while. It won't solve all the problems, but it should give us enough time to fully test your resistance." I thought about it for a moment and decided he must be crazy. He thought writing things down was going to help. I opened my mouth to tell him so, but he stopped me. "Just try it and if it doesn't work we will figure something else out." I sighed. "Fine, give me the damn notebook I have a lot I need to get down right now." He gave me a small grin and set the book down on the dresser and left the room.

I stared at it from across the room. I didn't want to do anything at the moment. I wanted to wallow in my self-pity. I wanted to be left alone. I wanted to curl up in a hole and disappear. I wanted to die. That one thought stopped me. I didn't want to die. I wanted revenge. I leapt off the bed and ran downstairs.

The whole family was in the living room. They all looked up when I entered. I didn't give them time to speak. "I know what I have to do. I want revenge. I will hunt them to the ends of the earth if I have to, but I swear to whatever god is listening I will slaughter them all."

EPOV

After Bella's breakdown, the men left the house. Carlisle and Esme decided that our presence wouldn't be helpful, and rightly so. We went hunting. Emmett and Jasper tried to talk to me, but I ignored them. I didn't want to be consoled. I wanted to feel everything I had brought upon myself. Bella was hurting and I couldn't help her, again. I was a failure.

Carlisle was the only one who let me be. He didn't try to force me to talk about my feelings or my thoughts. We found a herd of deer and drank our fill. After we had sated our thirst, we decided to just run for awhile. Running was the thing I loved the most, after Bella of course. Running helped me clear me head. I don't know where we went and I don't know how long we were gone, but eventually we returned to the house.

When we walked in, Esme and Alice were in the kitchen and Rose of in the garage. Emmett immediately left to find her. Jasper went to Alice and Esme came to Carlisle. She seemed distraught. Carlisle spoke first "Where is she?"

"She's upstairs in Edward's room. Carlisle, she wants to leave. She says she can't stay here for long." My heart clenched. It was my greatest fear. She hated us. She wanted to leave us forever. Carlisle took a deep breath. "She's too new to be out around humans, but we can't force her to stay here. I'll go speak with her." Esme sighed. "Be careful dear. She's very fragile right now." Carlisle left the room. I heard him upstairs talking to Bella.

When he came back down he looked hopeful. "I gave her a notebook to record her thoughts and emotions in. It's a technique sometimes used for rape victims. They need somewhere safe to express themselves and sometimes that is on a piece of paper. Hopefully this will help her heal. She also agreed to stay for the time being, pending the helpfulness of the notebook." I breathed a sigh of relief. She was staying, for now. It at least gave us some time to figure everything out.

Everyone seemed to take that in. After a moment, they all left and went about their business. I didn't move. I stood in the living room and just stared out the back window. I listened to Bella upstairs in my room. She wasn't moving at all. It was driving me insane. Not know what she was doing or thinking. I stared out the window until I heard her move. She was coming downstairs. Everyone heard her, she was quite new after all, and we all gathered together.

We all stared at her as she entered the room. She wasted no time. "I know what I have to do. I want revenge. I will hunt them to the ends of the earth if I have to, but I swear to whatever god is listening I will slaughter them all." My cold, dead, unbeating heart broke, again. To hear my once gentle, caring Bella speak like a cold hearted killer, like a monster, was torture. I left to spare her this existence and it didn't help. She ended up exactly like me.

I stepped forward. "Bella, love, please think about this. You don't want to be this person. You don't want to become a killer. You're understandably angry and –" She interrupted me before I could finish. "Don't tell me what I want Edward! You don't know me, not anymore, and you certainly lost any right you might have had to tell me what to do a long time ago." She was right.

I sighed. "I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to tell you what to do and I may not know you right now, but the girl I knew, the girl I know you still are, even if you don't, wouldn't want this." She glared at me. "No Edward! I'm not that girl anymore. She was ripped to pieces by the one person she trusted more than anyone in the world. She was abandoned by her chosen family and locked away by her blood family. She was left alone and forgotten. She was kidnapped, raped, and tortured. So no, I'm not that girl anymore and I never will be again."

Alice stepped forward. "Bella, please try to understand –"

"NO! You don't get to do that. You don't get to talk to me like we're sisters. You lost that right when you left without saying goodbye, when you didn't fight his decision to leave me." She rounded on Esme and Carlisle. "I thought of you as family. I thought you cared about me, but you left too. You let him make a decision, that I should have been a part of, without me without question." Emmet and Jasper were next. "And you! You say you thought of me as a little sister, but you left too Emmett! You didn't even say goodbye. And Jasper, despite what you may think I don't blame you for what happened at my party, but I thought after all that I might have earned an explanation for why you all left. Out of all of you here, Rosalie was the only one who was honest from the start. You all made me feel welcome and loved and then ripped my heart out and smashed it to pieces. At least she was honest about not liking me from the start."

Her anger was winding down, so I tried one more time to get through to her. "Bella, please don't blame them. This was all on me. I didn't give them a choice. I made them leave. Don't be angry with them." She took two steps forward and stopped within touching distance of me. I stared into her eyes and tried to find the Bella I knew was in there. She took a deep breath and slapped me across the face. "I hate you Edward Cullen and I wish I had never met you." Then she turned and walked away.

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A/N: Ok…I know I'm a terrible person for not updating, but school this semester crazy. My classes are trying to kill me. I am not abandoning this story, but you are going to have to be patient with me. There may (and probably will be) long periods of time between updates…just know I am still writing. As for this chapter, I'm not sure I'm entirely happy with it. I have been working on it for a few weeks now and honestly I don't know what seems off about it, so I'm posting it and hopefully you like it, but if you don't or think I should have done something differently…tell me…there is always a chance I will redo it and then re-post it…but enough from me…thanks for sticking with me…now all that's left to do is tell me what you thought…PUSH THE BUTTON!!


	23. Chapter 22

A/N: OK here's the next chapter…To everyone who reviewed the last chapter a great big THANK YOU!! This school semester is very stressful and I have been questioning myself a lot about my school choices lately, but then I read your reviews and they make me smile. I quick word about Bella's personality, I know some of you want her to go back to the old Bella and some of you like my version of her…I can't please everyone, but I will try. The story I have going in my head requires a somewhat cold-hearted Bella for a while, but don't intend for her to stay that way. I have every intention of making this story a have a happy ending so just stick with me and I'll try to make you all happy. Now…on to the chapter! PS…songs I think fit each part will be in italics at that section…you can find them on …enjoy!

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight…or any of the songs used here…**

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BPOV

_Song: One Step Closer – Linkin Park_

_I cannot take this anymore  
I'm saying everything I've said before  
All these words they make no sense  
I find bliss in ignorance_

I didn't let myself dwell on what I had just done. I walked out of the house and into the forest behind the house. I started running. I didn't have destination in mind, but I needed to get away. Not long after I started running, I found a clearing in the woods. I stopped and let myself sink to the ground. I slapped him. I slapped Edward. I couldn't believe it. I think what surprised me more was that I didn't feel bad about it. I wanted to hit him. He needs to understand that I am not the same person he left behind.

Just thinking about it made me angry all over again. I looked up and I could see the sky between the trees. The stars were out, it was beautiful, and I hated it. I screamed. I put all my rage and fear into that one scream and pour it into the heavens. When I was done I just sat and listened for any signs that I would have company, but there was nothing. There were no signs of wildlife either, which made sense when I thought about it. I had probably scared them all away.

I looked around the clearing I was in and suddenly felt trapped. I couldn't stay here. I started running before I knew where I was going. I thought as I ran. I needed away from green, away from the trees, away from the closed space. I needed the beach. I was half way there by the time I realized that's where I was headed. I needed the open space.

I reached the beach in La Push faster than I thought I would. I found a decent sized rock and perched myself on it looking out over the water. The moon and stars reflected off the surface. The scene was so serene it was infectious. I could hear the waves hitting the beach. The sound drew me from my perch to the waters edge. I slipped out my shoes and stepped into the water. And just like that, the ocean took my rage and my fears with each slap of the water on my feet. I was at peace for the first time since before my dreaded birthday.

Time was meaningless. I stood in the water and let the water bring me peace. I closed my eyes and tried to imagine what my life would have been like if I never came to Forks. I never thought of having my own family. I was too busy being the mom to my mother. I always wanted to get away, go to school, and finally figure out who I was, without my mom. But I had moved to Forks and I met Edward and my life was forever changed.

I then tried to imagine my life if Edward had never left. I would like to think we would still be just as in love now as we were then, but I just wasn't sure. I knew I was never enough to hold his attention, so I imagine he would have left eventually anyway. And I would have been just as heartbroken, but I imagined that I could have picked myself up, gone away to school, and forgotten him. I really tired to imagine it, but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't convince myself that I would have gotten over him and moved on with my life. I sighed. It was hopeless, no matter how angry I was, no matter how much I hated him at the moment, I still loved him.

A branch snapped in the trees behind me. I spun around and scanned the tree line for the danger. What I saw made me pause. There were 3 sets of eyes staring at me from the trees and even my enhanced vision couldn't see exactly what they belonged to. Wild animals were no threat to me, not anymore, and they usually ran from our kind. These were different. I dropped into a crouch and hissed at them, hoping to scare them away, but it just seemed to make them bolder. They all loped out of the trees at the same time.

They were massive, more like bears than wolves. The largest came forward and growled at me. The fact that they weren't running away scared me. I knew it was an irrational fear, I was indestructible, but I was scared. I ran. One second I was standing still and the next I was racing down the beach. I had to get away. The wolves gave chase. I pushed myself harder than ever before. I had to lose them in the woods.

The wolves were fast, but I was faster. I was going to make it, I was pulling away, but at the last moment, instinct told me to duck. I ducked. The largest wolves flew over the spot where my head had just been. And just like that, I was surrounded. I stood my ground and waited. The wolves circled me like vultures. It was then that I heard him. "BELLA! BELLA!" He was in the distance, but he was there. The wolves stopped for a moment and seemed to look at each other. The biggest one disappeared into the trees.

A minute later a man emerged from the exact spot the wolf disappeared from. I was thoroughly confused. The man spoke. "You're Isabella Swan?" I just nodded. "Who is your father?" The question was so random I froze for a second. "Umm…Charlie Swan, the chief of police in Forks. Who are you?" The man ignored my question. "Who turned you?" My jaw dropped. He knew what I was, or maybe he was just fishing. "I don't understand." He was angry now. He stalked forward and grabbed my upped arms and shook me. "Don't play dumb with me. Who turned you into a bloodsucker?"

How did he know? I decided to change the topic. "What are you?" He frowned but didn't answer my question. "Fine, don't answer me. We'll find out soon enough. Follow me." He let go of my arms, turn and walked away. I now had a choice to make. Did I follow him or try and run and risk being chased again? I decided to follow him; he was walking toward Edward's voice after all.

I followed him through the forest. We broke through the tree line and all the Cullens were there. Edward was pacing alone the same path as if he were held in place by an invisible wall. When he saw me he stopped pacing, but the man in front of me stopped moving. Had I still been human I would have run into him, but my new reflexes had me stopped before I could form the thought. Edward was obstructed from my view by the large man in front of me so I tried to step to the side to see him, but the two wolves behind me growled, which in turned caused Edward to growl.

The man was the first to speak. "What is the meaning of this Carlisle? Tell me this newborn doesn't belong to you. I would hate to have this be a breach in the treaty." Carlisle froze. "You know who I am and you know of the treaty?" Sam laughed, and it wasn't a nice laugh. "Of course I do. I am Sam Uley and my ancestors make the treaty with you and yours. Now what is the meaning of this blatant breach in our agreement?"

Carlisle sighed. "I'm sorry Sam. She is family, but we did not turn her and she was unaware of any treaty. I believe she was even unaware of your existence just as we were unaware that there were any wolves left here." The man, Sam, looked at me for confirmation. He sighed. "It doesn't matter if she knew about us or not and the treaty didn't have a time limit on it. She was on our land. And why are her eyes red?"

Carlisle glanced at me before answering. "She is new, less than a month old. Her eyes will fade over time. I'm sorry she was on your land, but she didn't know. She ran from the house seeking solitude. We didn't have a chance to warn her. It won't happen again." Sam looked at me for a moment. I still had no idea what was going on so I didn't say or do anything. He sighed. "Fine, just go. You get this pass because this life was forced upon you, but do not return to our land Bella Swan. We don't give many second chances." He stepped aside to let me pass, but apparently the other two wolves did not agree. They both moved closer to me and growled. I dropped into a defensive crouch and hissed. That's when all hell broke loose.

EPOV

She hit me. I know I deserved it, I actually deserved much worse, but it was such an un-Bella like thing to do. I wanted to follow her out of the house but Carlisle stopped me. "She needs time to calm down. Give her some space. I'm sure she will be fine." He looked to Alice for confirmation. I saw the vision. She would be fine, angry but fine. Alice spoke up for everyone else. "She'll be fine. She will be back before sunrise." Everyone let out a sigh of relief.

I stood by the back windows and stared out into the trees. Everyone else went about their business. Something wasn't right, I just couldn't figure out what it was. So I stood and I waited for her to return. I was actively tuning out my family's thoughts. I couldn't stand the idea of hearing them right now. I heard a small gasp behind me. I whipped around and saw Alice's eyes. She was having a vision. I tried to see what she was seeing, but all I saw was black. I didn't understand. "Alice what's wrong?"

She looked pained. "Bella just disappeared. I was looking into her future and she disappeared." I was worried, but I didn't understand why Alice was in panic mode. My confusion must have shown. "Edward you don't understand. She decided to go to the beach in La Push and she disappeared." Now I froze. She was going to La Push. The wolves were in La Push, or at least they were many years ago. Maybe they had died out after we left, but I knew I was wrong. I had a bad feeling all day and this was the reason. It still didn't explain why Alice couldn't see her though.

_Song: __Requiem for a dream by __Clint Mansell_

I turned from the window and looked at my family. While I was having my revelation, they were preparing to go to the border. In the next moment we were running toward the trees. I didn't know what would happen when we got there, but I needed to get to Bella. We got to the border quickly and while I was ready to run headfirst into whatever lay on the other side, my brothers and father were thinking more clearly.

Emmett and Jasper stepped in my path to block my progress and Carlisle spoke from behind me. "Son, we need to be careful here. For all we know she is absolutely fine and the wolves are no longer a problem." I sighed. "She's not fine Carlisle. I can feel it. Something's wrong. It has been since she left. It may be the wolves, but it could be something different. I'm just not sure and I don't want to take that chance."

He was silent, but then Emmett spoke up. "What if she wants to be alone?" I looked at him like he was crazy and he frowned at me. "Think about it. What if all she wants is to be alone and you go barging in on her. She is already angry with us. I think we should wait for a bit and see if she shows up." I rounded on the rest of my family. "I can't even believe we are having this discussion! She's in trouble. I can feel it. And if you won't come with me, so help me I will go by myself!" Emmett and Jasper may be stronger than me, but I was faster. I spun to run past them, but Alice stopped me. "Edward wait. She may be in trouble now, but she will be fine. I can tell."

I rounded on her. "How do you know when you can't even see her?" She looked me straight in the eye. "Because I can see your future. You have already decided what you are going to do if something happens to her and I don't see you doing that, ergo Bella will be fine." Her logic was sound, but that didn't mean that Bella was completely safe. I started pacing the invisible line that separated me from my love.

Then I heard it. Someone was moving in the trees, they were a long way off yet, but I could hear them. And then they stopped. "BELLA! BELLA!" I shouted as load as I could, hoping she would hear me. I didn't know for sure it was her, but I had to try something. After a moment, they started moving again, only this time at a much slower pace and I started pacing the line again. They were coming in this direction. A few moments later they broke through the line of the trees.

I relatively large man was walking towards us and from his thoughts he knew exactly who and what we were. I was more interested in where Bella was. She moved from behind the man and one of the wolves behind her growled, which immediately caused me to react.

All of my attention was focused on her and the danger that was behind her. I knew Carlisle was talking to the man, Sam I picked from his thoughts, but I wasn't listening, so I didn't know what was happening when he stepped aside. I quickly ran through Carlisle's thoughts and got caught up on the whole conversation. He was letting her go. He was letting us all go. I felt some of the tension in my shoulders ease, but it didn't last long. When Bella tried to come toward us, one of the wolves growled and lunged at her.

I was moving toward her before she hit the ground. I felt Emmett and Jasper behind me, but what happened next stunned us all. Bella twisted and hit the ground with the wolf on top of her, but before he could do any damage she rolled and used his momentum against him. She kicked him away from her and he landed at our feet, but we were too stunned to do anything. Bella sprang from the ground without a scratch on her and there were suddenly two more wolves between us and their fallen comrade.

Bella took one look at the three wolves and calmly walked over to us. We were all staring at her. "What?" I couldn't wrap my mind around this new version of my Bella. Carlisle spoke. "Well I think we all have had enough action for one evening. Let's go home." I expected Bella to object to the idea of our home being her home, but she was silent. We all followed ran toward the house in silence.

* * *

A/N: I know I'm terrible…it's not as long as I would have liked, but it seems like a natural place to end…and not too cliffy this time! But not to worry there is much more angst and drama coming up…I promise…again I'm not sure when I will be able to update next, but stick with me. I have spring break coming up and I am getting my wisdom teeth pulled so I will either be totally out of it or bored out of my mind and writing all the time…I'm not sure which yet…now push the little green button and tell me what you think…thanks!

Less I hear the less you'll say  
You'll find that out anyway  
(Just like before)

Everything you say to me  
(Takes me one step closer to the edge)  
(And I'm about to break)  
I need a little room to breathe  
('Cause I'm one step closer to the edge)  
(I'm about to break)

I find the answers aren't so clear  
Wish I could find a way to disappear  
All these thoughts they make no sense  
I found bliss in ignorance

Nothing seems to go away  
Over and over again  
(Just like before)

Everything you say to me  
(Takes me one step closer to the edge)  
(And I'm about to break)  
I need a little room to breathe  
('Cause I'm one step closer to the edge)  
(I'm about to break)

Everything you say to me  
(Takes me one step closer to the edge)  
(And I'm about to break)  
I need a little room to breathe  
('Cause I'm one step closer to the edge)  
(And I'm about to break)

Shut up when I'm talking to you  
Shut up, shut up, shut up  
Shut up when I'm talking to you  
Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up  
I'm about to break

Everything you say to me  
(Takes me one step closer to the edge)  
(And I'm about to break)  
I need a little room to breathe  
('Cause I'm one step closer to the edge)  
(I'm about to break)

Everything you say to me  
(Takes me one step closer to the edge)  
(And I'm about to break)  
I need a little room to breathe  
('Cause I'm one step closer to the edge)  
(And I'm about to break)


	24. Chapter 23

A/N: I know it's been far too long and I'm really sorry but here is the next chapter that you were all waiting for. Just one thing before you start…after rereading and thinking a lot about the last chapter I wasn't really happy with it. At this point I'm not going to go back and change anything, but it feels like I was trying to force the wolves into a story they didn't belong in. So that part of the story won't be going anywhere. So if you were excited and waiting to see the wolves again, sorry, but they just don't belong in this story. This chapter is twice as long as normal and has quite a lot in it. I hope that makes up for my extremely long absence. Now on to the chapter! Enjoy!!

* * *

EPOV

I had royally screwed up. Bella was a totally different person now, one I had no idea how to approach. We returned to the house in silence. No one knew what to say. I gave a cursory glance to my family's thoughts, but I was more focused on Bella. I watched her to whole way home. I was able to get a read on her emotions through Jasper. He was focused on her too. He wanted to make sure she wasn't going to snap and turn on the family. She was angry, of course, but more than that she was confused, and I didn't know why.

Before I had time to dwell on this, Alice caught my attention. _Edward, when we get back, you NEED to talk to her. This has gone on long enough. Talk to her! You two will work it out. You two belong together after all. The rest of us will disappear for awhile to give you some privacy._ I knew she was right, but I was scared.

We reached the house in what seemed like record time, probably because I wasn't looking forward to the conversation that was about to happen. True to her word Alice cleared the rest of the family out within moments of walking though the door. Bella was standing staring out the back of the house. She made no move to approach me so I moved toward her. "Bella, we need to talk." For a moment I thought she was going to ignore me, but then I heard a very quiet sigh. "I know. Let's talk."

BPOV

I knew he was right. We did need to talk, but I was afraid of what he was going to say. I was afraid of what I was going to say. I was even afraid of how I felt. I wanted to hate him for leaving me and causing all of this, but deep down I knew I didn't hate him. I turned around and looked at him. I would never admit it, but his beauty never ceased to amaze me. Every time I looked at him with my new eyes I was dazzled all over again. I hid it well though.

It was his turn to sigh. "Bella, I'm sorry, for everything." That pissed me off. "You're sorry?! Well sorry doesn't help me Edward not anymore. You left me. You were my world and you threw me aside without a second thought. You walked away and never even thought about what would happen to me without you."

"I thought about you every day. I wasn't the same person without you, but I was trying to do the right thing. I only wanted to keep you safe and I wanted you to have a normal life with someone who didn't have to worry about losing control and killing you! I love you Bella. I have always loved you and I will love you until I no longer walk this earth. I will do whatever it takes to earn your trust and make you see that I will never leave you again."

"But you said you didn't want me and that I wasn't good for you."

"I lied. I had to. You wouldn't have let me go any other way and I would have done anything to give you a normal life." He paused and let that sink in. "Can I ask you something?" I couldn't speak so I just nodded. "How could you believe me so quickly? I thought it would take hours to convince you that I didn't love you. I thought you were so sure of my feelings for you that you wouldn't believe me."

"It never made sense for you to love me. I mean I am nothing special and I was constantly in danger making you save me. I could see how that would get annoying. I was only human after all."

"Isabella Marie Swan, you really have no idea how important you are to me do you? I was useless without you. I couldn't even stand to be around my family. I isolated myself and waited to die. I was nothing without you and I can only be nothing without you. Please, tell me what I have to do to get you back."

I sighed. "I don't know."

**********Two months later************

BPOV

It had been two months since the Cullens found me. And my life was better than it ever had been. I was working through my trust issues and could now spend time alone with any of the Cullens. Esme, Alice and Rose were the easiest. Rose especially because she knows how I feel, kind of. Emmett, Jasper, and Carlisle were patience as ever and although it took awhile, they broke through my defenses too. And then there was Edward. He would have spent every minute glued to my side if I would allow it. We did a lot of talking over the past two months and I was just as confused as ever.

My anger at him was dissolving though. How could I hate him when he only wanted what was best for me? Even it was totally moronic to not talk to me about it. I was alone in the living room, which was rare in and of itself. I heard him come up behind me and I managed not to jump. "How are you today?" I thought about it for a minute. I needed to tell him what was going on.

"I don't know. I'm so confused. I wanted to hate you for a long time, but even when I told you I hated you I didn't. I can't. It would be like hating my own heart. I will always love you, but I don't know if I can trust you so completely again. I guess the only thing is to wait and see. I want to trust you, but only time can prove it to me."

He spun me around to face him. "Did I hear you right? You still love me?" I nodded. A low growl escaped his chest and suddenly his lips crashed over mine. It was like no time had passed. Everything that happened when we were apart fell away and my world was right again.

I had kissed Edward before, but this was totally new. I was no longer breakable and he no longer had to hold back. He kissed me like he was a drowning man and I was the air. It was a strange feeling, not needing to break the kiss to breathe. Another growl escaped Edward's chest and his lips left mine, but they never left my skin. He kissed along my jaw and my neck. A low moan escaped me, but before I could be embarrassed about it, Edward's lips were back on mine. He picked me up and carried me up the stairs to his room. All the while he kept kissing me.

We reached his room and he froze. I pulled away. "Damn it!" I looked at him. "No bed." I started to laugh and he smiled my favorite smile. "We can use the one in Alice's room if you like. I'm sure she would just love an excuse to go shopping for new furniture." I thought about it for a moment and decided against it. I shook my head and he sighed. "I suppose you're right. We will have to take care of that right away." He gently placed me back on my feet and placed a kiss on my lips, followed by the tip on my nose and then my forehead. "I've missed you."

I smiled at him. "I've missed you too." As I as speaking a stand of hair fell over my eyes, he brushed it back and ran his fingers though my hair as he did. I froze. Matt liked my hair too. I started hyperventilating. I jerked away from Edward's outstretched hand and back myself into a corner. "Bella? What's wrong love?" I couldn't speak. I didn't want to explain. I heard a phone ringing and I knew it was Edward's, but he just ignored it. He took another step toward me and I panicked. I bolted from the room like it was on fire. I had to get away. I wouldn't let him take me back. I ran out of the house and crossed the river. I knew he would follow, but I kept running. I eventually came across a small cave and pulled myself inside. All I could do was sit and keep the memories from taking over.

EPOV

I watched Bella bolt from the room and I took off after her. She was fast but I followed her scent. My phone rang again. I sighed in exasperation. It was Alice of course. I picked up the phone and she was already talking. "What did you do? Why do I see Bella curled up in a cave somewhere?" I sighed again. "I don't know Alice. Everything was fine. It was better than fine, it was perfect and then something set her off and she bolted. I'm following her now."

"Edward, stop. If something you did made her run she is not going to want to see you right now. Meet us back as the house and I'll go find Bella and bring her back." Her logic was sound but it was difficult to stop and leave Bella alone, again. "Just come home Edward and everything will be fine. She just needs some space right now."

"Ok Alice I'll see you in a minute." I hung up the phone and headed for home. They were all waiting in the living room when I got there. Alice didn't give me a chance to explain. "Tell me what happened." I sighed. "I don't know. We talked and sorted everything out. And then she ran." There were other details of course, but my family didn't need to hear them. _God he is as stupid as he seems._ I glanced sharply at Rosalie. She glared back at me.

"Well it's true. We all know something else happened between the talking and the running. I can smell the arousal in the air. You really don't think do you?" Now I was frowning. I didn't know where she was going with this. She sighed. "Edward think, what happened to her?" I froze, of course. How could I be so stupid?! "We kissed and would have done more, but there was an obstacle. That's what set her off."

"I don't think so." We all looked at Alice. I didn't see her bolt until you were already in your room and my guess is things started before then." She looked at me for confirmation and I just nodded. "It had to be something else. What did you do upstairs?"

"Nothing! We laughed, smiled, and then brushed a stand of hair out of her face. Then she bolted." Alice gave a sad smile. "Well that's it then. It's her hair. There must be something we don't know that caused her to remember. I can see that she will be okay, so I think we should just let her work this out on her own for now. She'll be back soon." I wanted to protest, but Alice was right. Some things Bella needed to deal with on her own, or so I have been told, many times in the past two months. I just nodded. Alice turned to Jasper. "Let's go hunt!" He smiled at her and they ran out the door. Everyone else resumed their normal activities, while I just stood and stared, waiting for her to come back to me.

BPOV

I sat in the dark of the cave and tried to talk myself down from my freak-out. I knew I was over reacting. It was Edward. I knew he would never physically hurt me, but my mind just snapped back to that awful place and I panicked. I decided to stay where I was until I was sure I had myself under control.

I could tell time was passing because the shadows were changing, but I really didn't pay any attention to it. I knew Edward would be worried, but I also knew that Alice would keep him calm until I could come back. She would see that I would be ok and he would see it too. And I WOULD be ok. I was not going to let this happen again. I could lock those memories away and go on with my life, at least that's what I told myself. I decided that I should hunt before I head back. That was another weird development in the past two months. Ever since my first hunting experience, we have known that human blood doesn't really appeal to me, but over the past two months we have tested that theory.

First we went by a little used trail and waited. A lone human walked by and everyone watched me, but his blood held no appeal to me. Then Jasper had the idea to see if someone who was actually bleeding was different, but rather than put someone at risk that way, we got blood from the blood bank. It was same as before. It smelled ok, but no different than the animal blood I was used to. Then Jasper wanted to see what would happen on a hunt. So he hid blood soaked clothes in the forest and I went to hunt. I think I actually managed to give him a heart attack when I didn't follow the scent mid hunt.

No one could figure it out. My final test was a group of people, but since the other tests gave the same results no one was really worried about it. It was our first family outing. We went to the mall. Alice felt I needed more clothes. I shook my head at the memory.

I had allowed myself to wander the forest with no destination in mind. So I was surprised when I found myself in our meadow. I felt a momentary sense of panic, but I stopped it in its tracks. This was not the same place; this was mine and Edwards' place. I smiled at the faint memory of my first trip here. It seemed like it was decades ago.

I lingered for a moment and let myself enjoy the memory, but I needed to hunt. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I smelled the usual wildlife, but there was something different. I knew that smell. There was a vampire close by and not one I knew. I felt the phone in my pocket go off, a gift from Edward so I could always reach him, but I ignored it. I scanned the tree line and saw nothing unusual, at first. But after a second, a figure stepped out of the trees and I froze. If I had been human I would have passed out, but this new body couldn't do that so I became a statue instead. I felt my phone buzz again, but I was too far gone to even think about answering it. The figure took a step toward me and smiled and my already bloodless skin became pale.

APOV

Bella would be fine. I saw that, at the time. So I went hunting with Jasper. Then something changed. Bella decided to go hunting before she headed home, only she didn't have a destination in mind, so I couldn't see what would happen. This didn't worry as much as it once would have. But still, it was Bella, and she was a magnet for trouble. She was still a newborn vampire, but she was strangely mature. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, even as a human she was more mature than anyone I had meet at her age. I sighed. Jasper felt my unease.

"Don't worry darlin'. She'll be fine." I just nodded. She may not have consciously made a decision about her destination, but subconsciously she decided to go to the meadow. The moment she made that choice a vision hit me. I stopped dead in my tracks and Jasper rocketed past me, only to be at my side a moment later. "What is it?" I saw what was going to happen. "NO!!"

Jasper had his hand on my shoulders and gave me a quick shake. "Alice what happened?" He was worried about me. "There's no time. Call Edward. Tell him to get to the meadow as fast as he can. Tell him to bring everyone. We need to get there now! Bella needs us." He didn't ask questions. He pulled out his phone and told Edward everything I said. I pulled out my phone and called Bella. I saw that she wouldn't answer, but I had to try. I could also see we might not make it in time, but again. We had to try. Jasper and I moved though the trees as fast as we could. I told him what I saw. He let out a low growl and we both found a new speed. "Will we make it?" I couldn't lie to him. "I don't know."

EPOV

I was still waiting for Bella to come home. I trusted Alice that she was ok, but still, I didn't like being away from her. It felt wrong. I was acutely aware of the time passing. It had been an hour with no word from Bella or Alice, both of which were understandable. I was surprised from I felt my phone go off. My family were the only ones with the number so that meant it was Bella or Alice and Jasper. I was hoping for Bella. Jasper was talking almost before my phone was at my ear.

I was immediately on edge. He didn't have to tell me it was about Bella. Why else would he call me when he was hunting with Alice? I was numb. I don't know what was going on, but Jasper sounded worried. I couldn't lose her. I just got her back. "We need to go. Now! Bella is in trouble." No one asked questions. We were flying though the forest. I explained the phone call, then shut up and found a new speed. I needed to save her. If anything happened to her I would never forgive myself.

BPOV

I think I was in shock. I never expected to come across him here, although I always knew I would see him again. He came closer to me and I still didn't move. "Well, well, well. What do we have here? Bella Swan, look at you. Apparently the last two months have been kind to you." I flinched. This man haunted my every waking moment for a long time. He looked me over and pulled out a cell phone. "You will never guess who I ran into. Yep. You know where I am. No. Ok see you soon." He hung up the phone and closed the distance between us, much too quickly.

He reached out and caressed my cheek. I flinched again. His skin was the same as mine. I glanced quickly at his eyes. They were ruby red. I looked away quickly so he wouldn't see the pure terror in my eyes. "Well it seems you haven't forgotten me either. That's good." He slapped me hard enough to turn my head. Instinct took over. I growled at him and dropped into a defensive crouch. "Ah there she is. I was hoping this would be more interesting than before." He sneered at me and dropped into a similar crouch.

Before either of us could make a move, a voice broke through the trees. "Now Mattie, play nice. And save some for me." I knew that voice. "Hello again Bella. Long time no see. Do you like my new toy? I figured you would. He has been so eager to see you, but we weren't sure where to look. We figured you would be with the Cullens, but we never thought they would come back to this place. Luck, it seems was on our side." I couldn't help but agree with her. Luck apparently was on their side. One of the only times I have been alone in the past two months and they manage to find me. This wasn't going to end well. I could only hope Alice had seen this and they were on the way.

"Victoria." I snarled at her. "Now now, is that any way to speak to your maker?" She smiled and then without warning she flew across the clearing and kicked me square in the chest. I flew into the trees and landed in a heap on the ground. I wasn't hurt, which was strange for me. I leap to my feet, but before I could turn and run the other way Matt was behind me, holding me in place. I struggled against him, but he too was a newborn and he was bigger than me.

He dragged me back to the clearing, to Victoria. She laughed. "Good. Can you hold her until they get here?" Matt grunted when my head found his nose, but his grip never faltered. Victoria came closer and pulled the phone out of my pocket. She scrolled though the contacts and apparently found what she was looking for. "Hello Edward." There was a pause. I could hear his voice, but I couldn't make out what he was saying. "Oh temper, temper. I would be very careful if I were you." Another pause. "Yes well, I'll take that into consideration, now if you'll excuse me; I'm a bit busy at the moment. I'm sure you understand. See you soon." She hung up the phone and crushed it.

She stalked toward me. "Now where were we?" She reached out and slapped me. Again it didn't hurt, but it was degrading. When I didn't say anything she stepped back. "Huh…it seems we are going to have to think of something else since you are indestructible now. I don't what to kill you until Edward gets here, which should be any minute. Think, think, what to do. Oh! I know." She reached forward and ripped my sweater down the middle and then did the same with my jeans. I was suddenly standing there in my bra and panties.

"It's just like I remember it, only more so." Once the tattered remains of my clothes were removed, Matt pulled me against him and his arms snaked around and pinned my arms at my side. I could feel him though the cloth of his pants. He was happy. I shivered. I would die before I let that happen to me again. "Matthew, you remember the plan don't you?" He sighed. "Yes. I remember." Victoria looked pissed. "Good. It has to be immediate. If you hesitate at all, we will both die. Do you understand?" I assume he nodded because she looked satisfied.

The instant they finished that exchange I heard movement in the trees and half a second later Edward burst though the tree line.

EPOV

After my conversation with Victoria, I ran even faster. I was pulling away from my family but I didn't care. I had to reach her. The meadow wasn't that much farther. Two minutes later I burst though the tree line and into our meadow and froze in my tracks. Bella was being held captive my Matthew Park, which would have been bad enough, but she was in her underwear. I dropped into a crouch and growled at him.

My family entered the clearing. Although they were strongly outnumbered Matt looked smug. I reached out to his thought, but he was reciting nursery rhymes in this head. "Now Edward let's now be hasty." I snarled at her. Victoria. I owed her a lot of pain for hurting Bella the way she did. I owed them both pain, but according to Rose, Bella would probably want to take care of Matt. I would gladly take them both, but if it was something Bella needed, then she would get it.

I kept Victoria in my peripheral vision, but my focus was Bella. She looked terrified and it broke my heart. I had failed her again. While I watched Matt moved his hands and let them roam over her exposed stomach and up toward her still covered breasts. The look on Bella's face made me want to die. She was not longer afraid, she was empty. She had shut down and it killed me to see it.

I heard Alice, Emmett, Jasper, and Rosalie growl behind me. Esme gasped and Carlisle was silent, but I knew they felt the same as me and any one of them would gladly take Matt out of the picture. "You're outnumbered Victoria. You are going to die here if you keep this up. Let her go." She actually laughed. "We may be outnumbered, but the real question is can you get to her before she gets hurt?" It was a good point. I was fast, but was I fast enough? I thought so, but did I want to risk Bella getting hurt?

I made the decision to take that chance, she was vampire after all. Then three things happened at once. I leapt toward Matt, Emmett and Jasper went for Victoria, and Alice had a vision. I saw how this moment would end and I could do nothing to stop it. Time seemed to move in slow motion. I saw Matt smile and bend his head. I heard the sound of his teeth piecing Bella's skin. I heard her gasp as she came back to herself. I locked eyes with her and saw the realization there and then it was over. I dropped to my knees where I landed. This couldn't be happening.

He dropped her body to the ground and laughed. My family was frozen for moment, and then all at once with a scream of rage Alice launched herself over me and landed on Matt. Jasper and Emmett were working and securing Victoria and Alice needed help. Rose flew over me as well together they managed to secure Matt. Jasper spoke first. "Start the fire." I couldn't seem to move. I couldn't take my eyes off of what was left of my Bella. Someone started the fire. I wasn't sure who, but I assumed Carlisle. Esme came and dropped to the ground next to me. She enclosed my in her arms. I could feel her shaking with tearless sobs.

I could hear the screeching of the rest of my family dismembering the two vampires. But I couldn't care about that. I shrugged out from under Esme's arms and crawled over to Bella's body. Her head lay 10 feet away. She looked so peacefully, like she used to when she was sleeping. One level of my mind wondered if vampires could go crazy. Carlisle took charge as usual. "Edward." I didn't acknowledge him. "Edward!" I looked up startled because Carlisle never yells. "We need to get her home."

"What difference does it make?! She's dead!" The instant I said the words the reality of what happened came crashing down on me. I was no longer numb. I was engulfed in a pain far greater than the pain of the change. I pulled her body into my lap and broke down. I felt my family move around me but nothing mattered anymore. I knew they were trying to get my attention, but I was buried under a mountain of agony. It felt like someone had punched a hole in my chest. Someone tried to take Bella's body from me and that did break though the wall of pain. I growled.

"Edward!" It was Alice. "Listen to me. See the vision I just had. Everything will be ok." I was shocked. "How can you say that? Bella was your best friend and you don't even care that she's gone!" I knew I was being ridiculous, but I couldn't seem to stop. Alice rolled her eyes at me. "Hardly, if you would pull yourself together and see what I have seen you would say the same thing." I did as she asked and watched the vision play out. Bella was standing in the middle of our meadow, alive and well. There was snow on the ground so it was future vision to be sure. "How? I don't understand." Alice sighed. "Edward, think for a minute. What is the only sure way to kill a vampire?"

I winced, but answered her question. "Fire." She smiled. I was still missing something. "Exactly. Why?" I thought about that. "Because vampires can – oh my God! Will it really work Alice?" She smiled. "Of course it will. I've seen it." She had given me hope. Carlisle spoke up then. "We really need to get her home. I think it will be less traumatic if she is somewhere familiar and safe." I agreed. I picked up her body and Alice picked up her head and we ran back to the house.

We laid Bella on the couch and covered her with a blanket. She looked like she could be asleep except for the gash in her neck. "How long will this take Carlisle?" He thought for a moment. "I honestly have no idea. I haven't seen anything like this before. I have seen other body parts reattach in a few minutes, but this is far more traumatic. I would assume at the very least a few hours." He looked at Alice. "Can you nail down a time?" Her eyes glazed over. "It looks like about 12 hours from now. I looked at the clock. It was 3pm.

No one wanted to leave, even though Alice had said 12 hours so we all sat and waited and watched. While they waited, the family took turns hunting, each one bringing back some blood for Bella. She would need to feed when she woke up. Alice managed to get her in a new outfit without moving her too much, which I was grateful for. The change was slow, like a flower blooming. You can't see it happening, but it does. When you are immortal, time is irrelevant. We don't measure time like humans do. Our idea of "soon" is a few decades. So when I say that those 12 hours were the longest of my life you know I mean it.

At 2:55am everyone went on high alert. I looked at Alice. She was bouncing up and down. "Just a few more minutes. She'll be perfectly fine." I trusted her, but I wouldn't be satisfied until I could hold her in my arms and see those beautiful eyes again. Her neck look completely healed. It was amazing actually. At 3am on the dot Bella moved. Not a lot, but it was like she jumped a little. I took her hand and squeezed. "Bella, love, can you hear me? Open your eyes. Please? Come back to me. Open your eyes love." I felt a slight pressure on my hand and then against all odds I was looking down on the most beautiful pair of burnt amber eyes I had ever seen.

"Edward?" Her voice was exactly the same, a little softer, but she needed blood. "Edward what's going on? What happened?" I had a moment of panic what if she didn't remember anything. How could I explain this? Before the panic could get out of control Jasper sent a wave of calm our way. I glanced at him. "Bella what do you remember?" Her face scrunched up as she really thought about it. "I remember our talk and how I freaked out and ran away. I'm really sorry about that. I don't know what happened. I know you would never hurt me." Typical Bella, always worried about everyone else. "It's fine love, I promise. What else?"

"I went and sat in a cave and pulled myself together and then decided I needed to hunt. I was walking and thinking and somehow ending up in the meadow. Matt and Victoria were there. I wanted to run, but I couldn't. She said something about a plan and then you showed up and he tried to – then there was a sharp pain in my neck and I remember seeing your face and wondering what could cause you that much pain, but that's it. Where are they? Did they get away? How did I get back here?" I barely contained my anger. But I had to stay calm for her. "Shhh. It's ok Bella. They didn't get away. We got them both. They will never hurt you again. I promise." She looked so relieved. "Really?" I smiled at her. "Really. As for how you got here, before I answer that, how are you feeling?"

"I actually feel fine, but weak." I nodded. "That's to be expected, Alice will you get her some blood." Alice disappeared and was back in a second with a cup of blood. Bella gulped it down then glared at me. "Now tell me how I got here." I sighed. "Ok well you remember the meadow and how Park had you captive. Well apparently the plan was to kill you as soon as one of us moved. Only I didn't realize it until it was too late. I lunged at him to get you free and he – " I couldn't continue. She looked at me, reached up and cupped my cheek. "It's ok. You can say it. Whatever it is, it doesn't matter. I'm ok now." I smiled a sad smile at her and took a deep breath. "He took your head off." I watched her for a reaction. She froze. "Bella are you ok?"

"I'm ok. Just give me a moment to process the fact that I died." I flinched at the word. She noticed and of course tried to comfort me. "It's ok. I'm fine, Edward, really I am." Just to prove her point she got up off the couch. I tried to protest by she silenced me with a look. The moment she was off the couch. Alice flung herself at her. "I'm so glad you're ok. You had me worried for a minute there." Bella just laughed. "Sorry. I'll try not to do it again." The whole family broke out in laughter at that. The next few minutes were filled with hugs and stern warnings not to do anything like that again.

Eventually the whole family filtered out of the living room and we were alone again. I grabbed Bella's hand, swept her up in my arms and ran up to my room. I opened the door and she started laughing. "When did that get here?" She was referring to the large bed that now occupied the center of my room. I grinned. "Apparently Alice saw a need to get a new bed. This was delivered about an hour before we got home. The delivery men had a key." I set her down and she walked over to the bed. She pulled herself into the middle of it and motioned for me to join her.

We both just lay side by side facing each other. She looked fine, but I couldn't get over how close I came to losing her. "Why so sad?" I sighed, sometimes she was just too perceptive. "I lost you today." She smiled. "But you got me back again. And I'm fine I promise." I let go of her hand and pulled her to me. I buried me head in her neck and placed a soft kiss there. "I know you're ok, but it was the scariest moment in my very long life. I think I went a little crazy." She wrapped her arms around me. "It's ok now. We don't have to worry about that happening again. I have no immediate plans of dying again. If that changes you'll be the first to know."

I pulled back sharply. Why would she say something like that? And then I saw her face. She was smiling. And when she saw my face she started laughing. I scowled at her. She leaned forward and kissed me. "You silly boy. Don't you know that the only place I want to be is with you? So as long as you are alive I will always find my way back to you." The kiss was too short so I leaned in for another and she indulged me. The kiss escalated and soon we were both panting. I broke away and she looked disappointed. It was my turn to laugh. "You look so cute when you pout. But I have something to say. Bella, I love you more than life itself. You are the only one to even touch my heart and I will want never anyone but you. I want to spend the rest of my existence with you, however long that turns out to be. Marry me, Bella."

For a moment she sat frozen and then she threw her arms around my neck and kissed me. "Is that a yes?" She laughed. "Yes. Yes. God yes Edward. I loved you before I meet you and I will never love another. Yes I will marry you." I kissed her again, this time with the intention of turning it into more, but apparently my _sister_ had other ideas. Alice came bouncing into the room without knocking. She launched herself at Bella and very nearly knocked her off the bed. "Congratulations! I'm so happy we get to official be sisters. You have to let me plan your wedding. Please?" Bella just laughed. "Ok Alice." She squealed. "BUT there are some rules."

"I know. I know. Keep it small, but honestly Bella, you are going to have to get used to parties." Bella laughed again. "I'll get right on that Alice. Now go away." Alice laughed this time and ran from the room. Bella turned to me. "Why do I think I just released a demon?" I shook my head. "You did. But its ok we can always run away to Vegas." I pulled Bella back to my lips and we fell back on the bed and spent the rest of the day just holding each other. Today had very nearly been the end of everything and we both realized that. But tomorrow was another day.

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A/N: First off, this is not the end. I think there are going to either be one longer chapter and then the epi or two shorter chapters and then the epi. I don't know when I will get a chance to work on them because of finals but I will work as fast as I can. Please review! A lot happened in this chapter and I didn't really intend it to be this way, but it's the way it ended up. I felt is I broke this up the story would have just been dragged out. Now push the button and tell me what you think! Thanks!!


	25. Chapter 24

A/N: Ok guys…again…I'm sorry for the wait. I won't bore you here so Enjoy and now on to the wedding!

**Disclaimer: As usual I own nothing...it all belongs to the wonderful SM.**BPOV

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I was getting married tomorrow. It was kind of insane actually to think how far we had come. I survived the darkest period in my life. Hell, I even survived death, twice technically. I giggled at that thought. "What's so funny?" Edward leaned in and kissed the tip of my nose. "Oh nothing. I was just thinking about everything we went through to get here." He looked confused. "And that was funny to you?" I laughed again. "No silly! But you have to admit, if three years ago Alice told me everything that was going to happen I would have laughed in her face and called her insane. We went through a lot to get here and even though most of it sucked. I think it made _us_ better."

He frowned at that. "Bella, I will never forgive myself got leaving and allowing you to go through that hell and then when you actually…well I'll never forgive myself. I will spend the rest of eternity making it up – " I stopped him with a kiss. "Stop blaming yourself. I know why you did what you did and I've dealt with what happened to me." He looked like he wanted to argue, but there was a booming knock on the door.

"Send him out or we come in." I laughed again. Emmett and Jasper were here to take Edward for the night. Alice really was the wedding Nazi. She insisted on traditional and that meant no Edward for the next 15 hours or so. I sighed, it would be the most time we had spent apart since we got engaged. "You better go before they break down your door." He leaned into me. "Let them break down _our_ door. Esme won't be too happy if they do." I smiled. "I like the sound of that. _Our_ door. But really you should go enjoy your last night of the single life." He sighed. "Bella, I couldn't be happier about our wedding. I have been waiting for this moment since I meet you." I kissed him quickly and then slid out from under him. I heard him groan from the bed. I opened the door before Emmett could do anymore damage.

"As tempting as it would be to see you too in trouble for wrecking Esme's door, I figured I should save it from anymore damage. But before you take him I have a few things to say to both of you. Number one, no strippers. I mean that. If I find out there were nearly naked females anywhere around the three of you I will make your lives hell. Number two, you better have him back in time for the wedding. The same threat applies. And number three, I'm sorry." They both looked slightly amused while I had been laying out my rules, but now they were confused. "I'm sorry for the way I acted. It wasn't you I was angry at and you didn't deserve anything that I said, so please forgive me?"

Emmett let out a booming laugh and picked me up into a crushing hug. "There's nothing to forgive little sis. You were rightfully angry at all of us, and quite honestly I'm surprised you didn't do worse." I smiled. He would think that way. Jasper surprised me by pulling me from Emmett's hug into one of his own. "He's right you know. You were pretty tame. But seriously, you have nothing to apologize for. Also don't worry about Edward. We Cullen's have a kind of tradition. Just some hunting and manly thing." When he said manly things, he released me and flexed his muscles. I just about doubled over in a giggling fit.

Emmett was growing impatient, and like the big kid he was he started whining about it. "Let's go already. There's a bear out there with my name on it!" This had everyone laughing. Edward wrapped his arms around me and kissed behind my ear. "Don't miss me too much. I'll be back before you know it." I smiled at him. "I'll be waiting." And then they were gone. Before I had time to start moping, Alice came bouncing into the room. "Come on Bella! It's time for some much needed girl time." She didn't give me time to object. She all but dragged me down the stairs. I was laughing by the time I reached the bottom.

It was a very tame night, for which I was thankful. I was half afraid that Alice would get _me_ strippers. I shuddered at the very thought. We talked about the weeding and the honeymoon. That was an awkward conversation to have with your mother and sisters, let me tell you. If I were still human I would have been brighter than a tomato. I tried to apologize multiple times, but they would let me. I eventually just gave up and muttered a quick sorry before they could shut me up again. It was nice. I hardly had time to miss Edward, I said hardly. One part of my mind was always wondering where he was and what he was doing. It was one of the benefits, if you could call it that at this moment, of having a vampire mind. I could think of and focus on so many different things at once without difficulty.

The night passed, slowly, but it did pass. Then it was my weeding day and Alice was dragging me upstairs to her bathroom. "We have work to do. Let's go Bella. We need to get you ready." I sighed. I was all for getting married in my jeans and sneakers, but Alice had other ideas. She sat me on a stool in her bathroom. Thankfully I didn't need much makeup anymore. I was already stunning. I could hear Esme and Rose downstairs setting up the living room for out little ceremony. I say little because it was just the family. Carlisle was presiding. I mean it's not like we could really invite anyone else, everyone thought I was missing some probably thought I was dead.

I sat and Alice played Bella Barbie for 2 whole hours. How she managed to fill the time I have no idea, but she did. About half way through my torture, I heard the boys return. I wanted to jump up and run to Edward so badly, but Alice saw my plan and stopped me in my tracks. "Don't you dare, Bella Swan. I will tackle you before you reach the door and then we will have to start all over again." I sighed. It wasn't the thought of Alice jumping on me that stopped me, I was pretty sure I could take her, but the very idea of starting all over made me cringe. So I sat like a good Barbie and waited for her to finish.

After my hair and makeup were done it was time to get dressed. Alice helped me into my dress. It was a simple gown. Alice had fought me on it the whole way. She wanted me in a princess ball gown that cost more than most people made in a year, but I put my foot down. This was my wedding damn it and I would get the dress I wanted. The dress was perfect for me. It had a sweetheart neckline and was straight down from top to bottom. It hit the floor at just the right length when I was in my heels. There were some sparkly details under the bust and at the bottom and it was just enough to make the dress perfect, without being outrageous. And then it was time to get married.

The downstairs had been transformed into a flower garden. It was beautiful. Alice had really outdone herself. White flowers covered every surface available. There were slashed of color that came from the roses, red, pink, yellow, blue, purple. I never knew you could get purple roses, but leave it to Alice to find something no one knew about.

The ceremony was perfect. It was intimate, yet to the point. I was not one of those girls who dreamed about the big church wedding where half the people weren't sure how they knew you. And I always hated those weddings where the person presiding drew it out. This was my dream I was marring the man I loved in a front of my family. I was a little sad that Charlie wasn't there, but he still thought I was missing. I wonder what we were going to do about that, or if we were just going to leave it alone and let them all assume I died. I mentally shook myself for thinking of this during my wedding. I pushed the thought aside and gave my whole focus to Edward.

Our vows were simple and traditional, but they worked for us. Carlisle pronounced us husband and wife, we kissed, and it was over. Like I said, perfect. According to Alice we were leaving for our honeymoon in an hour. I still didn't know where we were going. All I knew was that we had to take a plane. After we had been passed around for hugs and congratulations, Edward pulled me over to sit next to him on the piano bench. I was slightly nervous. I don't know if I was ready to hear any classical music yet, especially my song. Edward leaned over and kissed me. "I wrote this for you." He must have seen the apprehension in my eyes because he continued. "Don't worry, it's a new one." I relaxed against him. I could handle this. I hoped.

He started playing and I melted. It was beautiful. The beginning was soft and kind of heartbreaking really, I guess that was when we were apart. The middle was hopeful, probably from when I was being a total bitch but at least we were together. And the end was bright and filled with all the things that our future would hold. My eyes filled with venom, but the tears couldn't spill over like they did when I was human. He finished playing and finally looked at me. He looked a little fearful actually. He didn't say anything just looked at me and I was too emotional to say anything either. His fear turned to concern. "Are you alright love?" All I could do was nod. And then I leaned forward and kissed him. I put all my love and appreciation into that kiss. He kissed me back and I could feel our love pouring into each other. He shifted to face me and I crawled into his lap. I wanted as much contact with him as possible. We would have continued had Emmett not cleared his throat. "Alrighty kids. Break it up or get a room. And since you really don't have time for a room I suggest you break it up."

I pulled away from Edward and leaned my forehead against his. "Thank you. That was beautiful." He smiled. "Anything for you love." He kissed me again, but pulled away before it could progress. I pouted. He laughed. "Don't be like that love. We'll be alone soon enough." As soon as he said it he butterflies in my stomach started up in full force. I was nervous about being with Edward. I didn't know if I could handle it. Thankfully, before I could go into a full out panic Alice pulled me upstairs to get me into my going away outfit.

I needed to talk to her, but I didn't want Edward to hear. She pulled my dress off and I leaned down to speak in her ear. "I'm scared." She looked at me for a moment and then sat me on the bed. It didn't even matter to me that I was sitting my underwear. She spoke softly. "Bella, do you love him?" I nodded. "More than anything." She smiled. "Do you want to be with him?" I bit my lip and nodded. "Then what are you worried about?" I avoided her gaze. "What if I'm too damaged? What if I'm not good enough? Ok I know I'm not good enough for him, but what if he figures it out and leaves me again? I couldn't survive that Alice." I was working myself into a panic. "Bella calm down. He loves you. He married you. The whole time you were gone he was an utter mess. He couldn't leave you again even if he wanted to, which he won't. As for the rest, you two will figure it out. It's going to take some time Bella, and you may not be able to be intimate right away, but after what you went through that's normal. Should I get Rose? She might be more help with this than me." I thought about it for a moment. We talked a little about this last night, but my fears weren't settling themselves. "Yes please."

Alice disappeared downstairs and I heard her ask Rose and Esme to join us upstairs. Edward was probably wondering what was going on. The girls came back into the room and Alice and Esme started getting my outfit ready and Rose sat with me on the bed. "What's wrong Bella?" I looked at her for a moment before I had to look away. "What if I can't do this?" Rose reached out and took my hand. "Bella, we covered this. It's going to take time, but I don't think being intimate will be a problem with you two. You both love each other so much. And if something triggers a memory or makes you uncomfortable in any way you have to let him know. He may be a mind reader, but he can't read you. You have to tell him what you want and what doesn't work, ok?" I nodded. She was right. We could do this, I just had to focus on the fact that Edward would never hurt me and loves me. I smiled. "Thanks Rose. I know I'm being silly." She shook her head. "There is nothing silly about it Bella. What happened to you was traumatic and you have every right to be nervous, but just remember that you can talk to Edward about anything and if you need us we are only a phone call away."

I reach out and hugged her. "Thanks." She patted my back and then Alice was pulling me up so I could get dressed. "If you don't get a move on you're going to miss your plane." I laughed. The pixie was back in full force. She got me dressed and then we all head back down stairs. Edward was worried I could see it in his eyes. I just smiled at him. I'm sure one of the girls was filling him in. Sure enough, I saw him cringe a little and knew that he was feeling guilty again. I went over and he pulled me into his arms. "It's ok. We're ok." He kissed the top of my head. "We better get going if we don't want to spend our honeymoon in the airport." We managed to make it out the door after another round of hugs and promises to call if we needed anything.

We reached the airport and made our flight with perfect timing. "Dallas?" He grinned. "Just a stop along the way." I sighed. He really wasn't going to tell me where we were going. We reached Dallas in about 3 hours and made out connecting flight to Rio. I raised an eyebrow at him. He chuckled. "Just another stop love." I huffed. I was getting impatient. He sighed. "Are you alright love?" I knew he wasn't talking about my irritation about our travel arrangements. I turned to him. "I'm better than ok. I love you so much. I just had a moment of what if syndrome." He sighed again. "You know I love you more than my life. I would never do anything to hurt you again. You know that." I nodded, I did know that. "I know. It was just my old insecurities making another appearance. I'm fine now." He leaned over and kissed me. "Don't worry about anything my love, leave all the worrying to me." I giggled. "That sounds like a plan. I know how good you are at it."

He rolled his eyes and pulled me to snuggle into his side. We spent the rest of the flight in a comfortable silence.

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A/N: Ok…I know…I'm awful! I'm sorry. I finished up the semester and then spent a week trying to get my life together before heading to England for the summer, which is where I am now. I am doing my senior research project in England until August 2nd so I apologize for the really long delay, but there is probably going to be another one, I'll try my best not to make it another month though. PUSH THE BUTTON! Tell me what you think. Thanks!


	26. Chapter 25

**Disclaimer: I only own Twilight in my dreams…these characters all belong to the wonderful SM.**

A/N: Ok so this didn't take as long as I thought it would. Yay me! **Lemon alert!**…finally huh…bet you all thought I would leave you without one. Unfortunately this is also the last chapter before the epilogue. :'( I know…sad right…but on with the honeymoon!

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EPOV

We landed in Rio in the middle of the night and continued our journey to our destination. I could tell Bella was even more confused when we neared the docks, but to her credit she stopped asking where we were going after I told her Rio was just another stop. We climbed in the boat and sped off into the night. After about an hour I could see the outline of an island on the horizon. I pointed to it. "There it is love. Our final destination." She jumped to her feet, which immediately caused a slight panic attack on my end. What can I say, I'll always worry about her.

"What is it?" I chuckled. "That, my dear, is Isle Esme." Her jaw dropped. "She has an island?" I smirked. "It was an anniversary gift from Carlisle." She huffed. "Well now I know where you learned it all from." I laughed. "What can I say, we Cullen men like to spoil our women." She grin and slid her arms around my waist. "How much longer?" I grinned down at her. "Only another 20 minutes or so." She sighed and sat back down with a quick peck on my cheek.

We pulled into the dock exactly 20 minutes later. I grabbed the suit cases and swept Bella up into my arms. She giggled. "I am perfectly capable of walking to the door you know." I kissed the tip of her nose. "I'm nothing if not thorough." I speed up to the house and opened the door. As soon as we were inside I carried her to the bedroom we would be occupying. I set her and the bags down and let her take in the room. "Edward it's beautiful."

"I'm glad you like it, love. Now, join me for a swim Mrs. Cullen?"

BPOV

I gasped at the sound of my new name. As much as I wanted to throw myself into Edward's arms I knew I needed a few moments to gather myself. "You go ahead. I want to look around the house first. I'll be down in a few minutes." For a split second I saw the disappointment in his eyes, but it was soon covered by pure love. "Of course. I'll be waiting." He reached out and pulled me into his arms. In the next instant his lips were moving over mine and I was melting into his embrace. He pulled away. "But don't take too long. I'll be missing you." With that he turned and raced out the door.

I waited a few seconds until I knew he was far enough away. I knew he would still hear me, but I think he knew this wasn't about the house. Somewhere between the boat and the house my fears returned, stronger than ever. I knew I was being crazy. Edward was everything I wanted, but I couldn't help but feel this was too good to last. My life just didn't work like well. Not for long anyway. I sighed and figured I should find something to wear, although it didn't escape my notice that Edward didn't bring a suit with him. I opened my suitcase and to my surprise there was a note on top of my clothes. It was from Alice.

_Bella,_

_Stop worrying. Everything will be fine. He loves you. Now go have fun. Call me if you need to talk._

_Love,_

_Alice_

She obviously saw me freak out over this again. I put the note aside and started digging though my clothes for a swimsuit to wear. Of course all I had were teeny tiny bikinis. Oh well, if I was really going to do this (which I really really wanted to) Edward was going to see me in less than this soon anyway. I pulled out a dark blue halter and quickly pulled it on. I looked in the mirror and saw that the suit actually looked good. Damn Alice and her fashion sense. I shook my head, grabbed two towels from the bathroom closet, because Edward didn't bring that either, and walked out the door.

EPOV

I waited in the water. I could hear Bella moving in the house and desperately wanted to know what she was thinking. I knew her excuse of wanting to see the house was just that, an excuse, but I gave her the time she needed. I knew this wouldn't be easy and I would do anything for her. So I waited in the water. I felt her the moment she came outside. I turned and gasped. She was stunning. The dark blue of her bikini was perfect for her skin. Bless Alice and her fashion sense. The closer she got the more I wanted to run to her, but I held myself back and let her come to me. I didn't want to scare her.

She reached the edge of the trees and draped two towels over a branch before continuing on to the water's edge. She didn't hesitate to enter the water and was at my side a moment later. I was speechless. She hadn't looked me in the eye yet though and it caused me to worry. "Are you alright love?" She nodded but still didn't look at me. "Look at me, please." She started nibbling on her bottom lip and slowly raised her eyes to mine. The moment her eyes meet mine I saw all the doubts and fears she was carrying. I pulled her into my arms. "It's alright love, everything is ok." She started sobbing. "Edward I don't know if I can do this. I love you with all my heart and God knows I want you, but my head just won't let the memories go." I shushed her and smoothed her hair. "Bella listen to me. We don't have to do anything you don't want to do." She groaned. I tried not to let it affect me, but I couldn't get the picture of her making that noise in a very different setting out of my head. "But that's just the thing, I WANT to. God knows I've wanted you since forever. I just don't know how I'll handle being under someone again, even someone as wonderful as you."

It was my turn to groan. The image of Bella withering in pleasure under me was enough to make my already hard erection even harder. My mind was racing. I wanted her, badly, but I didn't want to push her. "It's ok love. Let's think about this a minute. It is the idea of being intimate or the thought of being trapped under someone that is really scaring you." She opened her mouth, but I stopped her. "Think about. Really think about it." And she did. I saw her forehead wrinkle. She spoke softly. "Being trapped." I sighed in relief. That was easy enough to get around. "Ok we can work around that." She looked confused for a moment before everything seemed to click. Her eyes lit up. "Do you think that would be ok?" She nodded her head, vigorously. I laughed.

She dropped her eyes again. "What love? You can tell me anything." She sighed and buried her face in my chest. "This is so embarrassing." I was intrigued. "What love? Tell me, please?" She sighed and mumbled into my chest. "What if I'm no good?" I couldn't help it I laughed. She looked up at me with fire in her eyes. "Don't you laugh at me Edward Cullen!" I stifled my laughed quickly. "I'm sorry love I wasn't laughing at you, but at the absurdity of that statement." I pulled her body flush against mine and I knew she could feel my very prominent erection because she let out a small gasp. "You see what you do me? You drive me crazy and you don't even try. There is nothing on this earth that you could do or not do that would disappoint me."

Before she had time to respond I leaned down and kissed her. It started out as a way to make her feel better and suddenly became so much more. She threw her arms around my neck and pressed herself as close as she could get. Her tongue licked across my bottom lip requesting entry which I happily gave. God I would never get tired of her taste. She was exquisite. I moaned into her mouth which only seemed to drive her further. She pulled away for a moment before literally jumping on me. She wrapped both legs around my waist which caused her to rub up against my painfully hard member. I groaned and pulled away. "I do believe you are over dressed Mrs. Cullen." She smirked. "I do believe I am Mr. Cullen, but might I suggest we take this to the bedroom."

I attacked her lips again. I started toward the house. She reached out and grabbed the towels as we passed the trees and then we were on the deck. I of course was ready to jump right into bed, salt water be damned, but she stopped me. "We need to rise off, and then dry off before we head in." I groaned and pouted a bit. She just laughed. "It'll take 2 minutes you big baby." I sighed and put her down. We walked over to the outdoor shower and rinsed off before quickly drying off with the towels. When she turned to look at me her eyes darkened and I could smell her arousal. I growled and swept her up in my arms before racing inside and depositing her on the bed.

BPOV

Rose had been right. We just needed to talk. I told Edward my fears and like the angel he is, he dealt with them. Of course him suggesting that I be on top nearly made my head explode. As if I wasn't having performance issues before. He talked me out of those too. And thank God he did. The feel of his erection against my core nearly made me lose it right there, but the sight of Edward in his full naked glory made me want to drag him to bed and never leave. Thankfully he had the same idea. He tossed me on the bed and I let out a small squeak. He was immediately next to me. We lay side by side and attempted to devour each other's tongues. It was strange not needed to breath, but oh so helpful when kissing.

He was holding himself back. I could tell he wanted to move things along, but he was waiting for me to move first. I pushed him down on his back and moved to lie on top of him, all while we continued the kiss. As soon as we were in our new position I reached up and untied my halter. I sat back and let it fall off exposing my breasts to Edward for the first time. He froze. When he didn't make a move I started to get nervous and made a grab for my top so I could put it back on. He grabbed my wrists before I could get it. "Unbelievable. Perfection." He pulled me back down to kiss him and the tension that had crept into me disappeared.

Edward released my wrists and moved his hands to my sides. He ran his hands up and brushed the sides of my breasts, which caused me to gasp. I was sitting up and straddling his waist by now. His hand found what they were looking for and I threw my head back at the feeling. He massaged my breasts and tweaked my nipples. I let out a low moan and he did it again. He was driving me crazy!

He sat up slightly allowing his mouth to close around my nipple. I arched my back to give him better access and let out a loud throaty moan, which he echoed right into my chest causing me to grind into his erection. He moved to my other nipple and the process repeated. When he was down I felt like my limbs were jelly. "Edward I need you." He grinned up at me. "I know the feeling love." To emphasize his point he bucked his hips. I had to get the bathing suit bottoms off before I went insane. I rolled off him and removed the bottoms. He hissed at the loss of connection, but I was right back where I started before he could finish.

The sensation of being skin to skin with Edward was indescribable. I lifted my hips and reached down to guide him to my entrance. His eyes rolled back when my hand closed over his member. I filed that away for later. I slowly lowered my hips and let Edward fill me. Once he was completely sheathed in me we both froze. We locked eyes and the utter love and devotion I say shining through Edward's eyes made everything right in the world. I felt silly for worrying about this at all. We fit together perfectly and it felt right. He saw something in my eyes that reassured him that I was in the same place he was and bucked his hips, eliciting a loud groan from both of us.

I started moving, slowly at first and then faster. I moved up and down his shaft while he gripped my hips and moved with me. Every thrust and grunt from Edward brought me closer to the edge, but what pushed me over was when he released my hip and brought his thumb down to my clit. As he moved inside me and rubbed my clit, my moans increased in volume until with one last thrust he pushed me screaming over the edge. I felt my muscles clamp down on him while I screamed his name. I vaguely heard Edward yelling my name as he fell over the edge right after me. After we came down, we lay side by side panting.

He spoke first. "Can we do that again?" I giggled and buried my head into his chest. I was happy. It was the perfect moment and I didn't even have one flashback. I sent a silent thanks up to God for letting me have this moment with my husband. I shifted my head and looked up at him. He was beaming down at me. "I love you so much Bella. You are my everything. All this, the absolutely perfect that is your body and the way we are together, is just icing on the cake. You need to know that you never have to prove anything to me. I love everything about you, just the way you are."

I would have been crying if I could. "Edward you have no idea how happy it makes me to hear that. The same can be said for you, you know. I know you carry around a lot of guilt, but I want you to let it go, for me. I don't blame you. Not anymore. I love you forever and always. Thank you for this, for letting me work though my issues without pushing for more. I honestly believe that I won't have any problems anymore."

I beamed down at me. "Well then are you ready for round two?" That was all it took.

EPOV

When Bella dropped her top I thought I had died. Of course when she rode me to a mind blowing orgasm, I thought I had died and gone to heaven. She was perfect and we were perfect together. I needed her again. I was already hard. That was one of the nice things about being a vampire, you were always ready to go. I rolled over and hovered about her, all the while watching for any sign that she was uncomfortable. Even after her little speech I was worried, sometimes no matter how much you think you are ready for something, you really aren't.

Her eyes were dark with desire and I captured her mouth with mine. Her hands tugged on my hair, which caused a growl to escape from my chest. Eventually I moved down to kiss her neck and upper chest before kissing and sucking each of her breasts. Her back arched off the bed and she moaned and wriggled under me. I didn't stay at her chest long. I had more exploring to do. I trailed open mouthed kisses down her stomach and abdomen. I teased her bellybutton with my tongue. She was staring down at me with wide eyes, finally having figured out my plan. "Edward" I looked up at her. "Do you want me stop?" She bit her lip and slowly shook her head. I'm sure I was grinning like the Cheshire cat. I continued my exploration of her body with my mouth.

I kissed, licked and sucked my way across her hips and down each leg before finally arriving at her center. I lay between her legs and looked up at her. I gave her another chance to stop me if she was uncomfortable. She didn't say anything so I dove in. I licked up her slit and we both hissed at the contact. She tasted divine.

I licked and kissed her folds before slipping one finger inside her. She arched her back and moaned. I added another finger and started pumping in and out. I was looking for the spot that would drive her mad. I knew when I found it when she almost came off the bed. "Oh God Edward!" I chuckled and the really went to work. My mouth latched onto her clit while my fingers pumped in and out of her. She was grunting and moaning and bucking her hips. I could tell she was close. "Cum for me baby." With those words she came screaming. She grabbed my head and shoved it harder into her, which I didn't mind in the least. I get pumping my fingers through her orgasm. When she finally came down she looked down at me. "Holy shit that was amazing." I gawked at her, and then burst out laughing. She joined in after a moment. I crawled back up her body and we cuddled.

"Just so you know, you are going to have to do that again, preferably every night. Also as soon as I can move I plan on returning the favor." My laugh turned into a groan. The thought of Bella going down on me was almost enough to make me cum on the spot. "You have no idea how much I would love to do that for you every night and every day for the rest of forever. I love you Isabella Cullen" She snuggled into my side. "I love you Edward Cullen." We watched the sun rise and I couldn't help but think that today was the first day of the rest of my life.

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A/N: Aww…ok so that is actually the last chapter. I could drag the honeymoon out, but you all know how that would go. Sex, sex, hunting, more sex…and so on, which I know you all love to read, but use your imaginations. So, I will be doing an epi that will go up…I have no idea when. But let me know what you think. PUSH THE BUTTON!


	27. Epilogue

A/N: Here is it ladies and gents, it's the epi! I'm so sad that this is the last chapter is what has been a wild ride of my first attempt at fanfiction. I hope I didn't disappoint…too much. Read the note at the bottom for info about what's next if you're interested. Now enjoy!

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_**20 years later**_

BPOV

My father was buried today. He wasn't even 60 years old. It was my fault. When I gave up living when Edward left, Charlie took it hard, but when I disappeared he fell apart. He never got over losing me. I say it was my fault and it was. I could never figure out a way to give him peace. Edward and I talked about it for years but we couldn't think of how to let Charlie know that I was ok while keeping the secret. Edward reached over and took my hand. We were driving back to Forks so I could visit his grave.

I know Edward was worried about me. I hadn't spoken much since I found out, but I just couldn't talk about it, not yet anyway. We pulled into the Fork's cemetery and in customary Washington state weather, it was raining. I didn't bother with an umbrella, there was no one around to see me anyway. I got out of the car and walked over to the fresh grave. When I saw his headstone immense pain ripped though my chest. I dropped to my knees and sobbed. "I'm so sorry Daddy. This is all my fault." I don't know how long I stayed there before Edward carefully gathered me in his arms and rocked me until my cries subsided.

He picked me up and carried me back to the car. "Ready to go home my love?" I looked at my husband, who was clearly very worried about me, and slowly nodded my head. "I think I am. This was hard, but I needed to say goodbye. I'm sorry you had to see that, but I think I'll be ok now. I knew this would happen eventually, but I just didn't think it would be so soon." He nodded in understanding, picked up my hand and brought it to his lips for a chaste kiss before putting the car in gear and heading home.

_**80 years later**_

EPOV

I can't believe a full century has passed since I found Bella. After the death of her father, I was worried she would spend years burdened by the unnecessary guilt of his death, but she surprised us all when she recovered after a few months. She still felt the loss, but it was easier now. Every year on the anniversary of his death we would return to Forks and she would visit him. This year it would be easier than ever because this year we would be living in Forks again.

The decision was made after a much needed family meeting. No one wanted to upset Bella by suggesting it so we had a meeting to try and decide where to go next. Imagine our surprise when Bella was the one to suggest Forks. She never stopped amazing me. So here we were, back where it all started so many years ago. Tomorrow we started school. Alice, Bella and I were transferring in as juniors, while Emmett, Rose, and Jasper were starting their senior year. Carlisle was starting work at the hospital again and Esme was working for an interior design company based in Seattle, but she could work from home so that worked out well.

I stood in the doorway of my old room and thought about how everything was the same but changed. I laughed at that thought. I turned to go in search of my mate. I had barely taken two steps when I heard her screech. "GOD DAMN IT EMMETT! WHAT DID YOU DO WITH MY BOOKS?" I chuckled to myself. After 100 years you would think that Emmett would learn to stop messing with my Bella. I raced downstairs to see the outcome of this little argument. The sight before me almost had me doubled over in laughter. Bella had backed Emmett into a corner and he looked genuinely frightened.

"Calm down Bells. I didn't do anything I swear." He looked to the rest of the family, all of whom were just as enthralled as I was. His pleading eyes landed on Rose. "A little help here Rosie?" She just laughed and shook her head. "Oh no dear. You got into this mess and you can get yourself out of it. Besides, you should know there are two things that will set Bella off the deep end, messing Edward and messing with her books." Bella spared a glance at Rose before turning her gaze back to Emmett. "I swear Emmett if those books don't show up in this living room in the next thirty seconds I will spend the next 50 years making your life a living hell."

Bella was incredibly sexy when she was angry. Emmett looked to me for help. "Edward can't you control her?" It only took him a second to realize his mistake. Bella let out a loud growl and lunged at him. He raced around her and out the back door. Bella gave chase until she reached the river. "YA YOU BETTER RUN! I SWEAR EMMETT CULLEN I WILL DESTROY EVERY VIDEO GAME YOU HAVE." The whole family was cracking up from the back porch. I walked up to Bella and wrapped my arms around her waist.

"You are so sexy when you're angry. Do you know that?" She turned in my arms. "I have been told that a time or two." I leaned down and captured her lips with mine. She deepened the kiss when she licked along my bottom lip. I growled, but pulled back for a moment. "What about your revenge?" She leapt into my arms and wrapped her legs around my waist. "Later. Right now I want to go upstairs and love my husband. I have eternity to get even with Emmett." I smiled at that and without a word turned and carried her upstairs to our room.

As soon as the door closed she attacked me. Her lips crashed over mine and our tongues dueled for dominance. Our clothes were shredded in the next instant and I spun her around so her back was to the door. I pulled back from the kiss to look in her eyes. She was just as worked up as I was. I claimed her mouth again as my hips surged forward and I entered her in one hard thrust. She tore her lips from mine and cried out.

She locked eyes with me and I started moving. I would never get used to the feeling of being inside her. It was everything. As I continued my movements she threw her head back as she started moaning. My mouth latched onto her neck and I proceeded to trail open mouthed kisses down to her breasts. I took one nipple in my mouth and rolled the other. She cried out at the sensation. Her hips started bucking against mine and I knew she was getting close.

"Oh God Edward! I'm close baby…don't stop…please don't stop." Her pleas drove me forward and I picked up the pace. She screamed my name as her wall clamped down on me. I didn't stop. I released her nipple and attacked her neck. I rode her through her orgasm and I felt mine rapidly approaching. I pulled back and looked into her eyes. "Mine." I growled. "Yours, forever." She hissed. I turned my head and bit down on her neck. That was all it took to send her over the edge again and I followed right behind.

We were both panting and shaking from the intensity of our orgasms. I walked backward to the bed and we both lay down and clung to each other. "I love you my Bella. Forever and always." She leaned up and kissed my jaw. "As I love you Edward. You are my everything." We both snuggled down into the bed, not needing to, but enjoying the feeling anyway. Sometime later there was a knock on the door. It was Alice and she knew better than to come in, so she talked through the door. "I just thought Bella should know that she still has it. Her box of books magically appeared in the living room not too long after Emmett went running for the hills." Bella giggled. "Thanks Alice!" I just held Bella close and reveled in the fact that we had the rest of forever together, and I couldn't be happier.

**THE END**

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A/N: I can't believe it's actually over! It was been a crazy ride and I couldn't be happier with the response I received from all my wonderful reviewers, not to mention all the favorite/alerts. You guys have been amazing and if it wasn't for you I probably wouldn't have finished this. I know it was a long time coming and I apologize for the long delay between updates.

Now what's next for me? Well I just adopted a fanfic from joy102601 called "Abused" so I will begin work on that as soon as possible. A great big thank you for trusting me with your story and I will try to make everyone happy. After that I am thinking of doing a sequel to She Sleeps, but I'm not sure yet. Let me know what you guys want.

So now I bid you all a fond farewell with a reminder to tell me what you thought about my story and also if you want to read my future works make sure to add me to author alert. Thanks for everything! NOW PUSH THE BUTTON!


	28. Chapter 28

Hey everyone,

I know it's been a long time since I have published anything so this is probably a giant surprise. Unfortunately it's not a good surprise. I just wanted to reassure everyone that in light of the, in my opinion, quite ridiculous witch hunt with stories being pulled and whatnot, I will NOT be pulling this story myself. If it disappears, it is completed over at the writer's coffee shop which has no such problem.

I truly appreciate each and every one of you who have read, reviewed, and/or alerted this story and me. It was my first attempt at anything remotely writing related. I don't think my foray into fan fiction is completely over but I just started graduate school so my time is not my own. I have a few idea though so maybe a new story might come out soon…I'm sure I'll need something other than chemistry to entertain me.

Thanks again for all your support!


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